Homer: "Marriage is a coffin. And each child is like another nail."
dolphins invade springfield
mayor kwimbe adressing the town folk trying to calm them down
"people,people we are all frightened and horny"
dont know why but i just love that quote
mayor kwimbe adressing the town folk trying to calm them down
"people,people we are all frightened and horny"
dont know why but i just love that quote
i downloaded an mp3 called "the best of Ralph". ahhh what comedy. my favorite is when the school does a presidents' day play and ralph says, "Is Pres. Lincoln Okay?" or "Miss. Crubaple and Prin. Skinner were in the closet making babies and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me".
No wait my FAVORITE is "Hi Supernintendo Chalmers", yeah that's the one.
No wait my FAVORITE is "Hi Supernintendo Chalmers", yeah that's the one.
Homer
*ahem* La la la la.... *ahem* LAAAAAAA!!
DO...... the stuff... that buys me beer...
RAY..... the guy that sells me beer...
ME...... the guy... who drinks the beer,
FAR..... a long way to get beer...
SO...... I'll have another beer...
LA...... I'll have another beer...
TEA..... no thanks, I'm drinking beer...
That will bring us back to...
(Looks into an empty glass)
D'OH!
*ahem* La la la la.... *ahem* LAAAAAAA!!
DO...... the stuff... that buys me beer...
RAY..... the guy that sells me beer...
ME...... the guy... who drinks the beer,
FAR..... a long way to get beer...
SO...... I'll have another beer...
LA...... I'll have another beer...
TEA..... no thanks, I'm drinking beer...
That will bring us back to...
(Looks into an empty glass)
D'OH!
Why in tarnation is this thread not a permanent at the top thread whatever you call it slippery, stuffy...Anyway,
The episode where Mr. Burns (my most favorite episodes star Mr. Burns) is dating the younger woman and has to bring Homer along on all their dates...at the end Mr. Burns says something to Homer about the heart being the strongest muscle in the body, and Homer goes, Really? What about the wiener? I saw a guy on TV lift a can of paint with his once....
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
The episode where Mr. Burns (my most favorite episodes star Mr. Burns) is dating the younger woman and has to bring Homer along on all their dates...at the end Mr. Burns says something to Homer about the heart being the strongest muscle in the body, and Homer goes, Really? What about the wiener? I saw a guy on TV lift a can of paint with his once....
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
episode where homer buys lisa a pony
skinner: these things get worse every year
walks on stage:this show is the best one yet
ralph: My dingaling, my dingaling, i want you to play with my dingaling
skinner: these things get worse every year
walks on stage:this show is the best one yet
ralph: My dingaling, my dingaling, i want you to play with my dingaling
Here's a great one from this past week's episode where Krusty runs for senator (congressman??):
Krusty: Look at this list of words I'm not allowed to use
Bart: I've never even heard of #9 before
Krusty: 2-ing her 11 while she's 5-ing your 13
5 that 13 baby, 5 it!
<ComicBookGuy>
Funniest Simpsons quote ever!
</ComicBookGuy>
Krusty: Look at this list of words I'm not allowed to use
Bart: I've never even heard of #9 before
Krusty: 2-ing her 11 while she's 5-ing your 13
5 that 13 baby, 5 it!
<ComicBookGuy>
Funniest Simpsons quote ever!
</ComicBookGuy>
since my unemployment, i've been watching lots of simpsons downloaded off the internet (Homer: is that thing still around?).
when they go to the american restaurant in japan:
Homer: oh man, they stuck us in Taxachusetts!
more japan episode:
-Bart: Knife goes a in, guts a come a out, that's what Osaka fish collective is all about! i think i finally found my calling.
-Homer: All hail Emperor Smashasaurus!
My personal favorite is Doctor Nick:
"This won't hurt a bit...until i jam this down your throat!"
"The most rewarding part was when he gave me my money!"
ben.
when they go to the american restaurant in japan:
Homer: oh man, they stuck us in Taxachusetts!
more japan episode:
-Bart: Knife goes a in, guts a come a out, that's what Osaka fish collective is all about! i think i finally found my calling.
-Homer: All hail Emperor Smashasaurus!
My personal favorite is Doctor Nick:
"This won't hurt a bit...until i jam this down your throat!"
"The most rewarding part was when he gave me my money!"
ben.
That was funny. I can't believe they got away with it.
Willie:
"There's nary an animal alive that can outrun a greased Scotsman."
Aaaah, Good stuff
"There's nary an animal alive that can outrun a greased Scotsman."
Aaaah, Good stuff
Homer is reading the story of Joan of Arc which is portrayed by Lisa
Lisa: God has chosen me to lead the French to victory over England
Homer: Victory? We're French! We don't even have a word for Victory.
Lisa: God has chosen me to lead the French to victory over England
Homer: Victory? We're French! We don't even have a word for Victory.
The Simpson't are French?Originally posted by Joe Pozer
Homer is reading the story of Joan of Arc which is portrayed by Lisa
Lisa: God has chosen me to lead the French to victory over England
Homer: Victory? We're French! We don't even have a word for Victory.
It was an episode where Homer was reading Lisa stories and the Simpsons were acting them out.
http://www.snpp.com/episodeguide/season13.html
Tales from the Public Domain: A variation on "Simpsons Tall Tales", this time with Bart as Hamlet, Lisa as Joan of Arc, and Homer as...Homer (well, Odysseus actually).
http://www.snpp.com/episodeguide/season13.html
Tales from the Public Domain: A variation on "Simpsons Tall Tales", this time with Bart as Hamlet, Lisa as Joan of Arc, and Homer as...Homer (well, Odysseus actually).
oh yeah...I remember that one...the last episode last night was hysterical...Lisa is taking gymnastics and the coach tells her she did good and says you can have your cat back and pulls snowball II out of his jacket and gives him to her...then the two college girls are in the locker room and he says everyone did good today, you can have your cats back...and he hands the girls some cats and one of them says but I had a dog, and he goes...is cat now...Originally posted by BobTheEngineer
It was an episode where Homer was reading Lisa stories and the Simpsons were acting them out.
http://www.snpp.com/episodeguide/season13.html
Tales from the Public Domain: A variation on "Simpsons Tall Tales", this time with Bart as Hamlet, Lisa as Joan of Arc, and Homer as...Homer (well, Odysseus actually).
Yes, Lugash the gymnastics coach has been in a couple episodes.
From the "Behind the Laugher" VH-1 Spoof:
Homer: After a while, the pain became like a drug, but what was even more like a drug were the drugs
Lisa (announcing her expose book): Homer fed us anti-growth hormones for years to keep the series alive
Marge: I learned that when people reach for their diaphragm, they don't want to see my face
Karl: ...One time Bart paid us $50 to kiss each other
Lenny: Yeah, did we ever get that money?
Bart: ... I was tired 'cuz I stayed up all night paying people to kiss
Lisa: I got invited to so many birthday parties, it got to where I had to read the cake just to know who I was singing to
That's got to be one of my all-time favorite episodes, classic stuff
Homer: After a while, the pain became like a drug, but what was even more like a drug were the drugs
Lisa (announcing her expose book): Homer fed us anti-growth hormones for years to keep the series alive
Marge: I learned that when people reach for their diaphragm, they don't want to see my face
Karl: ...One time Bart paid us $50 to kiss each other
Lenny: Yeah, did we ever get that money?
Bart: ... I was tired 'cuz I stayed up all night paying people to kiss
Lisa: I got invited to so many birthday parties, it got to where I had to read the cake just to know who I was singing to
That's got to be one of my all-time favorite episodes, classic stuff
That episode is absolutely hysterical...there is one part where Marge says, we used 50 (or 100) dollar bills for toilet paper...and regular toilet paper for dog toilet paper...HAHAHAHA
Gotta represent the "Behind the Laughter" episode a little more:
Homer: I just want to get one thing straight: I thought the cop was a hooker
(Interstitial going out to commercials): FAME. MONEY. MILHOUSE. DONUTS.
Marge: Nobody told us raising kids would be so difficult. It almost drove me to fortified wine
Homer: We had a hard time until we found out we could just plop them in front of the TV. That's what my parents did, and I turned out TV.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
And from the episode "Lisa the Tree Hugger" where she lives in the tree:
At the end when Tex the tycoon cuts down the tree, it destroys Hemp World, and newspaper headline is "Hemp World Reduced To Stems and Seeds"
Homer: I just want to get one thing straight: I thought the cop was a hooker
(Interstitial going out to commercials): FAME. MONEY. MILHOUSE. DONUTS.
Marge: Nobody told us raising kids would be so difficult. It almost drove me to fortified wine
Homer: We had a hard time until we found out we could just plop them in front of the TV. That's what my parents did, and I turned out TV.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
And from the episode "Lisa the Tree Hugger" where she lives in the tree:
At the end when Tex the tycoon cuts down the tree, it destroys Hemp World, and newspaper headline is "Hemp World Reduced To Stems and Seeds"
Marge: "Homer, you couldn't go on a hunger strike. You eat while brushing your teeth!"
Moe " Uhhh, I wouldn't eat those peanuts, they're spitbacks"
Jeez....I just noticed this thread had only 4 stars...who's the hater!
Well since I'm here...last nights 10 o'clock episode was one of the all time funniest...when Mr. Burns is dating the younger woman...he is trying to open a fortune cookie and is struggling with it and you hear a crack and Smithers says...good job sir...and he hands the cookie over to Smithers and says...that was my thumb...
another funny line Mr. Burns had was when he was on the farris wheel with the girl and she asks him what he's INTO...and he looks around and sees the car ride for kids and says piloting motor coaches...and looks around again and sees a dude with a pooper scooper picking up dog **** and he says and collecting dog waste...
Well since I'm here...last nights 10 o'clock episode was one of the all time funniest...when Mr. Burns is dating the younger woman...he is trying to open a fortune cookie and is struggling with it and you hear a crack and Smithers says...good job sir...and he hands the cookie over to Smithers and says...that was my thumb...
another funny line Mr. Burns had was when he was on the farris wheel with the girl and she asks him what he's INTO...and he looks around and sees the car ride for kids and says piloting motor coaches...and looks around again and sees a dude with a pooper scooper picking up dog **** and he says and collecting dog waste...
The whole family is up all night putting a puzzle together. Homer says something along the lines of "we have been up all night, it is time to get the kids some coffee" They then show a digital clock set to "4:20":evil: 
Troy: Come on Jimmy, let's take a peek at the killing floor.
Jimmy: Ohhh!
Troy: Don't let the name throw you Jimmy. It's not really a floor, it's more of a steel grating that allows material to sluice through so it can be collected and exported.
Troy: Come on Jimmy, let's take a peek at the killing floor.
Jimmy: Ohhh!
Troy: Don't let the name throw you Jimmy. It's not really a floor, it's more of a steel grating that allows material to sluice through so it can be collected and exported.
Homer gazing at ceiling
Homer: Oh God!! Why have you forsaken me?
Marge: That's not God. That's a waffle that Bart threw up there.
Homer pokes at waffle with broom handle, knocks it to the floor, picks it up, and eats it.
Homer: Mmmmm...Sacralicious.
Homer: Oh God!! Why have you forsaken me?
Marge: That's not God. That's a waffle that Bart threw up there.
Homer pokes at waffle with broom handle, knocks it to the floor, picks it up, and eats it.
Homer: Mmmmm...Sacralicious.
I saw Principal Skinner and teacher in the closet and they were making babies and I know it was a baby because it looked at me.
During NRA meeting
Moe: Yeah, so last night I was closing up the bar, when some young punk comes in and tries to stick me up. [the crowd gasps]
Sideshow Mel: Whatever did you do, Moe?
Moe: Well, it coulda been a real ugly situation, but, I managed to shoot him in the spine. [crowd claps and cheers]
Moe: Yeah. I guess the next place he robs better have a ramp!
Moe: Yeah, so last night I was closing up the bar, when some young punk comes in and tries to stick me up. [the crowd gasps]
Sideshow Mel: Whatever did you do, Moe?
Moe: Well, it coulda been a real ugly situation, but, I managed to shoot him in the spine. [crowd claps and cheers]
Moe: Yeah. I guess the next place he robs better have a ramp!
Homer Singing: When I was 17, I drank some very gooood beer, I drank some very good beer that I purchased with a fake I.D.
Willy's view towards his tractor= our view towards our bikes....
Groundskeeper Willie as he tends to his tractor:
Willy: Ah, my beauty, wait till the superintendent sees you. Were it not a violation of God's laws, I'd make you my wife!
Groundskeeper Willie as he tends to his tractor:
Willy: Ah, my beauty, wait till the superintendent sees you. Were it not a violation of God's laws, I'd make you my wife!
Mr. Burns: So, another Friday's upon us. What'll you be doing, Smithers? Something gay, no doubt.
Smithers: Wha What?!?
Mr. Burns: You know light-hearted, fancy-free. Mothers lock up your daughters, Smithers is on the town.
Smithers: Hahaha exactly sir.
Smithers: Wha What?!?
Mr. Burns: You know light-hearted, fancy-free. Mothers lock up your daughters, Smithers is on the town.
Smithers: Hahaha exactly sir.
I liked this one from the past week's new episode:
Bart: I can't wait to see what Marge has planned for Family Wednesday this week
Homer: Yeah, Pictionary was so much fun last week!
Lisa: Dad, that wasn't pictionary, it was an intervention to stop your drinking.
Homer (looking at drawing of himself in an alocoholic rage): Wow... that really brings me back
Bart: I can't wait to see what Marge has planned for Family Wednesday this week
Homer: Yeah, Pictionary was so much fun last week!
Lisa: Dad, that wasn't pictionary, it was an intervention to stop your drinking.
Homer (looking at drawing of himself in an alocoholic rage): Wow... that really brings me back
When the Simpsons move into the church and kick out the AA meeting, so Moe comes in disguise and offers "Moes" as an alternative meeting place. 
This was just on a new one a few weeks ago.
Homer: I wish God were alive to see this
Homer: I wish God were alive to see this
This thread needs a bump
"Ah, sweet pity. Where would my love life have been without it?"
"That's it! You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college!" -Homer J
"It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day." -Homer
"Ah, sweet pity. Where would my love life have been without it?"
"That's it! You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college!" -Homer J
"It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day." -Homer
that's not a quote!!! that's a scenario!!!Originally posted by -BB-
When the Simpsons move into the church and kick out the AA meeting, so Moe comes in disguise and offers "Moes" as an alternative meeting place.
Willie:
Our air conditioner is wasting more energy than Ricky Martin's girlfriend... HEYOO!
Our air conditioner is wasting more energy than Ricky Martin's girlfriend... HEYOO!
Bah! Details!
No...it's not that I'm picky like that...hell I post scenarios as opposed to quotes all the time...it's just I have to keep a few people on RM in line...namely BB, Brian HCM#2, and Joe Pozer...they are my beeeatches....
Alright, I'll give that to ya... so I don't know if this has been posted, but how 'bout:
"I'm a pop sensation!" - Ralphie when Bart et alia were turned into a teen boyband for purposes of Naval recruitment
heh heh heh... I said naval recruitment...
