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canadmos

Cake Tease
May 29, 2011
20,190
19,156
Canaderp
Got Bitlocker'd on my own computer......at work. The heck man.

I'm thinking that is a sign to check out for the day.
 

SkaredShtles

Michael Bolton
Sep 21, 2003
65,376
12,531
In a van.... down by the river
@canadmos, the computer expert: what would you say if I told you it takes almost 3 minutes to boot to the Windows desktop on my laptop, and once at the desktop, it takes over 5-1/2 minutes to start Chrome.

This is not to be considered "normal" performance, amirite?

Fucking computers. :mad:
 

StiHacka

Compensating for something
Jan 4, 2013
21,560
12,504
In hell. Welcome!
@canadmos, the computer expert: what would you say if I told you it takes almost 3 minutes to boot to the Windows desktop on my laptop, and once at the desktop, it takes over 5-1/2 minutes to start Chrome.

This is not to be considered "normal" performance, amirite?

Fucking computers. :mad:
Open the tasks manager, noob!
Sounds like some malware is encrypting your files. nttawwt if work PC. :D
 

Westy

the teste
Nov 22, 2002
54,232
20,013
Sleazattle
Despite having very high end hardware on my work laptop all the corporate bloatware make it pretty fucking useless. 90% of the time it cannot even keep up to me typing. It pretty much melts down when I actually have to run a program that actually does anything.
 

SkaredShtles

Michael Bolton
Sep 21, 2003
65,376
12,531
In a van.... down by the river
Did you look at the all users view? Some system process is likely busy stealing your data or mining crypto. :D
Yah - looking at everything. There just ain't shit going on, that I can tell, that would bind things up to the point that chrome takes 5 fucking minutes to start. But @Westy appears to have at least a similar experience with his work laptop.

Sometimes I'll save something in Notepad and it'll actually say "Not Responding" - fucking NOTEPAD. Stops responding. WTF? :rant:
 

canadmos

Cake Tease
May 29, 2011
20,190
19,156
Canaderp
that is faster than usual











:homer:
@SkaredShtles what this guy said ^^

I would say me being an expect is a bit of a stretch. :busted:

Though I would generally blame the slow logon/boot time on either 1. old hardware 2. your AD GP setup and whatever might be running. Now Chrome starting slow, that might be #1. With an SSD, you should be able to open Chrome almost immediately after your user profile has finished loading in Windohs.

There is a local policy on your computer that you can set, that will display what exactly is running or what you waiting for during the logon process, instead of the generic "Please Wait..." bullpoop. That might give a hint... Maybe there is a logon script hanging up.
 

StiHacka

Compensating for something
Jan 4, 2013
21,560
12,504
In hell. Welcome!
Yah - looking at everything. There just ain't shit going on, that I can tell, that would bind things up to the point that chrome takes 5 fucking minutes to start. But @Westy appears to have at least a similar experience with his work laptop.

Sometimes I'll save something in Notepad and it'll actually say "Not Responding" - fucking NOTEPAD. Stops responding. WTF? :rant:
Has your PC been recently updated with Meltdown and Spectre patches? :tinfoil:
 
@SkaredShtles what this guy said ^^

I would say me being an expect is a bit of a stretch. :busted:

Though I would generally blame the slow logon/boot time on either 1. old hardware 2. your AD GP setup and whatever might be running. Now Chrome starting slow, that might be #1. With an SSD, you should be able to open Chrome almost immediately after your user profile has finished loading in Windohs.

There is a local policy on your computer that you can set, that will display what exactly is running or what you waiting for during the logon process, instead of the generic "Please Wait..." bullpoop. That might give a hint... Maybe there is a logon script hanging up.
OK, help, which policy setting?
 

AngryMetalsmith

Business is good, thanks for asking
Jun 4, 2006
21,077
9,780
I have no idea where I am
Got selected for random whiz quiz first thing in the door. Fine, whatever. All well and good as the only thing in my urine is high concentrations of espresso, and I need to pee, so great timing. Drive my ass down to "collection center". Place doesn't open for another 45 minutes and holy balls do I really need to pee by now. :dead:
Can't you just leave it in the mail box ?
 

stoney

Part of the unwashed, middle-American horde
Jul 26, 2006
21,516
7,063
Colorado
More work in garage done. Whole bunch of stuff ready to be sold and other stuff thrown out. Sold some bike parts too; almost enough to pay for a set of boots.

Starting to get plans for the rock climbing wall in the garage laid out. It's 8' wide and 10' tall.tall. Thinking bottom 3' vertical, 4' section 45*, 4' section 30*, then horizontal on the roof for 3-4'. Either that or replace the 30* section vertical to the wall.
 

jdcamb

Tool Time!
Feb 17, 2002
19,799
8,383
Nowhere Man!
My friend Jan bought LaPreferida! Tamales in a can at the Dollar store. We did not know they sold Tamales in a can. He scarfed them up vigorously. Then he drank a bunch of Vodka and Scotch. I walked him home. It took 2 hours to walk him 10 blocks... He got to the top of the stairs and passed out. I helped his mom get him inside. She gave me 2 boxes of Girl scout cookies for my troubles. Caramel Delights. I still have a whole box left....
 

Da Peach

Outwitted by a rodent
Jul 2, 2002
13,681
4,904
North Van
My friend Jan bought LaPreferida! Tamales in a can at the Dollar store. We did not know they sold Tamales in a can. He scarfed them up vigorously. Then he drank a bunch of Vodka and Scotch. I walked him home. It took 2 hours to walk him 10 blocks... He got to the top of the stairs and passed out. I helped his mom get him inside. She gave me 2 boxes of Girl scout cookies for my troubles. Caramel Delights. I still have a whole box left....
I cannot fathom what you get up to in an average day.

Mind you, I got a poop smear on my leg during pajama time, so I guess we’re even.
 

AngryMetalsmith

Business is good, thanks for asking
Jun 4, 2006
21,077
9,780
I have no idea where I am
I played golf with a stick and some poo where a hiker had let their precious pooch squeeze one out onto the trail at the start of today's ride. Well at least I think it was dog poo.
 

jdcamb

Tool Time!
Feb 17, 2002
19,799
8,383
Nowhere Man!
I played golf with a stick and some poo where a hiker had let their precious pooch squeeze one out onto the trail at the start of today's ride. Well at least I think it was dog poo.
I try to remain Poo averse as a rule... Upon even the slightest suspicion I get out the Bleach.
 
You're in the local security policy, not group policy. Are you on Windows 7 or 10?

https://docs.microsoft.com/en-us/previous-versions/windows/it-pro/windows-server-2008-R2-and-2008/cc731745(v=ws.11)

Though to be honest I can't remember the last time I edited the local policy on a non-domain joined computer. So it could be slightly different...
Shows you how much time I failed to spend in policy administration. Windows 10 pro. Opened the Local Group Policy Editor, still couldn't find setting in tree, no big deal, thanks.