[johnbryanpeters]

"The next thing I’m going to do is carve one of the longer gourds into a perfect replica of the Mayflower as a shout-out to our Pilgrim forefathers. Then I’m going to do lines of blow off its hull with a hooker. Why? Because it’s not summer, it’s not winter, and it’s not spring. Grab a calendar and pull your fucking heads out of your asses; it’s fall, fuckers."

https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/its-decorative-gourd-season-motherfuckers

 

[jdcamb]

I went to the zoo and there were no animals there. Except for a ShihTzu....

 

[Westy]

 

[Westy]

 

[Westy]

 

[Westy]

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

 

[6thElement]

Why the f%^& have Christmas commercials suddenly filled the airwaves today. That's my rant.

 

[Pesqueeb]

Why the f%^& have Christmas commercials suddenly filled the airwaves today. That's my rant.

Fo rizzle. Watching the baseball game. There have been at least 5 Christmas commercials.



Fucking Dodger's.

 

[Pesqueeb]

Fucking Dodger's.

 

[Westy]

Why the f%^& have Christmas commercials suddenly filled the airwaves today. That's my rant.

Feel the greatness now that Trump made it legal again to say Merry Christmas.


Merry Fucking Christmas Everyone!

 

[jdcamb]

My brothers second oldest asked me if I could not be a dick about the holidays. I was unaware that I was being a dick. I am in charge of Christmas AM breakfast and pizza. Her girlfriends Mom is cooking the Turkey. No Ham this year either...

 

[rideit]

We are hosting turkey day for 14 at our house, and I really fucking wish it were at somebody else's house. Then I could just bring the turkey, and do fuck all the rest of the night.

 

[Westy]

We are hosting turkey day for 14 at our house, and I really fucking wish it were at somebody else's house. Then I could just bring the turkey, and do fuck all the rest of the night.

Don't wear pants. Make sure the turkey is real moist. Pop a few pointless viagra.

It will be nothing but you and a sexy sexy turkey in no time.

 

[jdcamb]

I have to wear pants and no bongshed allowed either.

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

I have to wear pants and no bongshed allowed either.

You have to wear pants to cook breakfast ? Pants ?

 

[jdcamb]

You have to wear pants to cook breakfast ? Pants ?

Yeah all of that shit. I presume I will also be paying for everything also..

 

[JohnE]

...no bongshed allowed either.

???? This here is 'murika™ son. You gots to stand up for your rights.

 

[I Are Baboon]

 

[jonKranked]

I have to wear pants and no bongshed allowed either.

and you agreed to it why?

 

[Westy]

I have to wear pants and no bongshed allowed either.

And what happens if you don't?

Canadian mafia cement shoes?

 

[rockofullr]

Feel the greatness now that Trump made it legal again to say Merry Christmas.


Merry Fucking Christmas Everyone!

I'm too close to Berkeley. The glorious leader's sphere of influence can't reach me. I still have to say:

Happy Fucking Holidays Motherfuckers

 

[jdcamb]

And what happens if you don't?

Canadian mafia cement shoes?

I don't get a dead baby seal for Christmas.

 

[Westy]

I don't get a dead baby seal for Christmas.

I forgot.


Merry Christmas!

 

[6thElement]

New TSA screening procedures, my normal security takes 15 minutes from walking into the terminal to get through. Today it took hour. My observations are you have to put everything you possess in a plastic bin and then your bin gets pulled aside anyway to get swabbed...

Then your airline announces your flight is running two hours late an hour before you were due to depart...

 

[Nick]

New TSA screening procedures, my normal security takes 15 minutes from walking into the terminal to get through. Today it took hour. My observations are you have to put everything you possess in a plastic bin and then your bin gets pulled aside anyway to get swabbed...

Then your airline announces your flight in running two hours late Ann hour before you were due to depart...

yea, but remember, you're a sketchy foreigner. ya can't be too careful these days!

 

[DaveW]

Ima just gonna imagine that one of those is Dumpf's head.......

 

[TN]

 

[jonKranked]

New TSA screening procedures, my normal security takes 15 minutes from walking into the terminal to get through. Today it took hour. My observations are you have to put everything you possess in a plastic bin and then your bin gets pulled aside anyway to get swabbed...

Then your airline announces your flight is running two hours late an hour before you were due to depart...

i always opt for the pat down instead of the machine scanner. part part the fact that i am making a gov't employee grope me in public, for free.

 

[boogenman]

 

[JohnE]

i always opt for the pat down instead of the machine scanner. part part the fact that i am making a gov't employee grope me in public, for free.

One of my idiot nephews and his immense girlfriend work at DIA. Let me know next time you head up and I will put the word in for you to get rub and a tug happy ending...

 

[eric strt6]

We are hosting turkey day for 14 at our house, and I really fucking wish it were at somebody else's house. Then I could just bring the turkey, and do fuck all the rest of the night.

hey go find your own scam, that one is mine. I cook the bird at home then we take it over the the BILs house for the meal

 

[eric strt6]

I'm too close to Berkeley. The glorious leader's sphere of influence can't reach me. I still have to say:

Happy Fucking Holidays Motherfuckers

I thought you just leaned up against a lamp post on Telegraph with your hand out saying "spare Change?"

 

[rockofullr]

I thought you just leaned up against a lamp post on Telegraph with your hand out saying "spare Change?"

No

I'm the guy that walks up to you and whispers, "hey man, you need any acid? Shrooms? E?". At least we still have capitalism for the black market in Communist Cali.

 

[6thElement]

Why do people list stuff on PB if they can't be arsed to actually accept payment and post the damn item?

 

[Pesqueeb]

Why do people list stuff on PB if they can't be arsed to actually accept payment and post the damn item?

Because Pinkbike.

 

[StiHacka]

Why do people list stuff on PB if they can't be arsed to actually accept payment and post the damn item?

Perhaps in certain marital situations, showing effort might be as good as actually getting rid of all that stuff?