I'll laugh my ass off if one of the teams rolls out w/plus sized tires cause of the mud! Hahahaha!
Vallnord - Andorra WC thread 2017...
- Thread starter 'size
- Start date
seems as if a number of teams/riders are upping to ~220mm rotors
There were actually quite a few in the last rounds too. Good thing imo. I'd totally throw a 220mm on the front of my DH-bike.
Timed training results are up, looks like Hart likes being back on mid-sized wheels. Good to see Rachel managed a couple of runs too. Hopefully she can put in a qualifying and race run to keep things interesting in the overall.
I'm gunu be that poster, but I am loving the women's field much more this season with rach on the mend. She just constantly dominates and it gets increasingly uninteresting
anyways mute this and put some cool tunes on
anyways mute this and put some cool tunes on
Good. He looked like he was a kid riding his dad's bike.
I stand by my theory that the fastest wheel size should scale based on rider size just like bikes do. Minnaar looks like a normal human on the big wheels and clearly they worked well for him. But the little guys on big wheels just looks comical. Why do we accept that there is one fastest wheel size for every rider?
https://www.pinkbike.com/news/a-brewing-storm-practice-vallnord-world-cup-2017.html
media is top fukking notch
I got good feelings about this dude
media is top fukking notch
I got good feelings about this dude
Well, well, well, looky here...its race weekend just before Epic Freedom/2nd Amendment Celebrate With Sky Fire Day! The fastest guys on the planet are running up big bar tabs at Daytona chain restaurants, local Harley Davidson dealerships are overrun with morbidly obese Cracker Barrelians, Daytona area lot lizards earn 75% of their annual income in a matter of hours, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. is making his last competitive appearance at the hallowed grounds of DMS. Let's all pour out a little Bud Light Limes in honor of Junior's old man, the great Sam Dale...wait, what? I forgot, no one with a blood sugar level under 300 cares about God damned left turn racin'...Its actually time to get amped up for the first real WC race of the season! Muricahhhhh!
* Like me, Vallnord is awesome, virile and everybody loves it.
* Dale Earnhardt Jr. likely won't be in Europe this weekend...maybe ever for that matter.
* Contrary to popular fake history, Andorra was (obviously) founded by a race of aliens...specifically, the Andorans:
http://memory-alpha.wikia.com/wiki/Andorans
Turns out that being blue and all, they are arch enemies with orange space dildos, like the one currently occupying the house of epic freedom.
* Laurie Greenland won't, umm, be available for this race due to some unfortunate comments he made about wheelsizes. Hissssssssss
* Disregard my first bullet above- this track sucks because it has berms and jumps.
* WC riders are pussies, as are the UCI officials who closed off the final section because it was too hard. The average RM poster could've easily ridden this section with their short travel trail bike that they don't own because they won't make a fucking decision.
* Cedric Gracia > any NASCAR driver ever
* Mandorra would be a pretty kick ass name for a country...national food: tacos, national drink: bourbon (neat), national flag: Iron Maiden cover art, National Weed: yes, National anthem: anything from High on Fire, National Bike: anything from GG, National toy: wood axe, National symbol: bewbs, National car: '90's era Toyota Land Cruiser, e-bikes= capital punishment, etc...just saying
Welp, that about covers it, so this seems like an easy podium to predict -
1.) Laurie Greenland -
So our reptilian overlords figured they could just turn the AC down to 60* in Laurie's hotel room and that'd make him too sluggish to even flicker his forked tongue, obviously forgetting that our nasally pierced hero is in fact endothermic; which means he just snugged up the cheap, polyester hotel blanket a little more and slept quite comfortably thank you. Thusly, the 26er heretic delivers a huge victory for strong sized wheels, which is the first since rat-bong-boy (which we still don't have an emoji for btw) won at the fake WC track Leogang some 3 years ago. When asked how he managed to overcome the massive advantages accorded to his bigger wheeled foes, he responds flatly with: #offset.
2. Brendog - Dear @Sandwich
Everyone's favorite lispy shred lord finally grabs a podium spot, and we are spared Claudio's snarky mid-run comments about his ace rider. How did he do it? Simple - by following Laurie's brave example, he slipped some strong sized wheels into his Gambler, which helped get the BB closer to a kidwoo approved height and of course provided playful/poppy/snappy/responsive/zippy handling characteristics.
3. Dale Earnhardt Jr. - Murica...Fuck yeah! Why finish 17th in Daytona when you can finish on the podium in Andorra? Exactly, which is why left-turn jesus decides to make the jaunt across the pond and stun the field on a special edition Chevy Monte Carlo fat bike
And yes, those are 26" tires
4.) @jstuhlman - What's better than some Murica? MOAR Murica! After leaving his BFF (me) for dead in an isolated, neck deep Pisgarian "creek crossing", the beast of the east roars off to Yurp to ring the clarion of true freedom (which in this case means firing off several magazines of 5.56 mm ammo into the air). Riding his unridabru and crooked as fuck Intense (Murica) Uzzi (gunz), the old bastard stomps down the now cunted up Vallnord track with patriotic savagery. Upon learning of his stunning result, Intense rewards him with a brand new M16...Although he is somewhat disappointed to discover they actually just sent him a real M16 rifle from Amazon (it did come in 2 days tho since it was through Amazon Prime). Regardless, it is worth pointing out that this archaic Uzzi does in fact have 26" wheels.
5.) Gary Fisher - Woot! Even MOAR Murica!!! Blasting the now bitched up Vallnord track on arguably the best performing design ever (i.e. Level Betty), the blithering stoner of yesteryear wraps up the last podium spot. Opting to eschew a full face bike helmet for a floppy "Cat in the Hat" top hat, GF reminds the world what a well designed URT can do, which subsequently leads udi to commit seppuku. Oh btw, did I mention it has 26" wheels? Make that a clean sweep bishes...
The lady flyers:
1.) Rach - doped up on pain mitigating narcotics and still nursing a bad shoulder injury, Rach slips onto the top step by a narrow 5 second margin.
2.) Trace - No worries ma-lady, it's all about Cairns...I will Tonya Harding a bitch if necessary...XOXOXOXOXO
3.) Pom Pom - thank fuck she's back on a bike that actually fits her
4.) Tahnee - well maybe Tranny's new pico-wheeled bike isn't doomed to the scrap heap after all.
5.) Manon - slides into the last podium spot by just 7 seconds.
* Like me, Vallnord is awesome, virile and everybody loves it.
* Dale Earnhardt Jr. likely won't be in Europe this weekend...maybe ever for that matter.
* Contrary to popular fake history, Andorra was (obviously) founded by a race of aliens...specifically, the Andorans:
http://memory-alpha.wikia.com/wiki/Andorans
Turns out that being blue and all, they are arch enemies with orange space dildos, like the one currently occupying the house of epic freedom.
* Laurie Greenland won't, umm, be available for this race due to some unfortunate comments he made about wheelsizes. Hissssssssss
* Disregard my first bullet above- this track sucks because it has berms and jumps.
* WC riders are pussies, as are the UCI officials who closed off the final section because it was too hard. The average RM poster could've easily ridden this section with their short travel trail bike that they don't own because they won't make a fucking decision.
* Cedric Gracia > any NASCAR driver ever
* Mandorra would be a pretty kick ass name for a country...national food: tacos, national drink: bourbon (neat), national flag: Iron Maiden cover art, National Weed: yes, National anthem: anything from High on Fire, National Bike: anything from GG, National toy: wood axe, National symbol: bewbs, National car: '90's era Toyota Land Cruiser, e-bikes= capital punishment, etc...just saying
Welp, that about covers it, so this seems like an easy podium to predict -
1.) Laurie Greenland -
So our reptilian overlords figured they could just turn the AC down to 60* in Laurie's hotel room and that'd make him too sluggish to even flicker his forked tongue, obviously forgetting that our nasally pierced hero is in fact endothermic; which means he just snugged up the cheap, polyester hotel blanket a little more and slept quite comfortably thank you. Thusly, the 26er heretic delivers a huge victory for strong sized wheels, which is the first since rat-bong-boy (which we still don't have an emoji for btw) won at the fake WC track Leogang some 3 years ago. When asked how he managed to overcome the massive advantages accorded to his bigger wheeled foes, he responds flatly with: #offset.
2. Brendog - Dear @Sandwich
Everyone's favorite lispy shred lord finally grabs a podium spot, and we are spared Claudio's snarky mid-run comments about his ace rider. How did he do it? Simple - by following Laurie's brave example, he slipped some strong sized wheels into his Gambler, which helped get the BB closer to a kidwoo approved height and of course provided playful/poppy/snappy/responsive/zippy handling characteristics.
3. Dale Earnhardt Jr. - Murica...Fuck yeah! Why finish 17th in Daytona when you can finish on the podium in Andorra? Exactly, which is why left-turn jesus decides to make the jaunt across the pond and stun the field on a special edition Chevy Monte Carlo fat bike
And yes, those are 26" tires
4.) @jstuhlman - What's better than some Murica? MOAR Murica! After leaving his BFF (me) for dead in an isolated, neck deep Pisgarian "creek crossing", the beast of the east roars off to Yurp to ring the clarion of true freedom (which in this case means firing off several magazines of 5.56 mm ammo into the air). Riding his unridabru and crooked as fuck Intense (Murica) Uzzi (gunz), the old bastard stomps down the now cunted up Vallnord track with patriotic savagery. Upon learning of his stunning result, Intense rewards him with a brand new M16...Although he is somewhat disappointed to discover they actually just sent him a real M16 rifle from Amazon (it did come in 2 days tho since it was through Amazon Prime). Regardless, it is worth pointing out that this archaic Uzzi does in fact have 26" wheels.
5.) Gary Fisher - Woot! Even MOAR Murica!!! Blasting the now bitched up Vallnord track on arguably the best performing design ever (i.e. Level Betty), the blithering stoner of yesteryear wraps up the last podium spot. Opting to eschew a full face bike helmet for a floppy "Cat in the Hat" top hat, GF reminds the world what a well designed URT can do, which subsequently leads udi to commit seppuku. Oh btw, did I mention it has 26" wheels? Make that a clean sweep bishes...
The lady flyers:
1.) Rach - doped up on pain mitigating narcotics and still nursing a bad shoulder injury, Rach slips onto the top step by a narrow 5 second margin.
2.) Trace - No worries ma-lady, it's all about Cairns...I will Tonya Harding a bitch if necessary...XOXOXOXOXO
3.) Pom Pom - thank fuck she's back on a bike that actually fits her
4.) Tahnee - well maybe Tranny's new pico-wheeled bike isn't doomed to the scrap heap after all.
5.) Manon - slides into the last podium spot by just 7 seconds.
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DAMMIT @jackalope - that's a pic of Dale Sr., not Dale Jr. you might need to get your "sutherner" card pulled, son. KNOW YOUR DALES. plus, it's jimmie johnson who's the real hardcore mountain bike riding left-turner, which aligns with his woo-like vertical figures.
good luck finding your way out of wilsons tomorrow . . .
good luck finding your way out of wilsons tomorrow . . .
lol hackalope can't even get his earnhardts right, how is fairclogs going to podium?
qualifying is today right? anybody know what time?
Edit: looks like its on right now! Fin Iles and Matt Walker were within .3s and all the other juniors 6s+ back.
Hannah qualifies first for the women, Rachel 15s back, maybe a crash?
Men running now:
http://www.uci.ch/mountain-bike/ucievents/2017-mountain-bike-uci-mountain-bike-world-cup-presented-by-shimano/162153117/widgets/live-timing-results
Looks like top 5 are Tbro, Mingnar, Vergier, Gwern, and Broni
Edit #2: Holy crap the Syndicate is on fire this year. Have they ever had a season where every one of their riders was a consistent top 10, and threat to win the race?
Edit: looks like its on right now! Fin Iles and Matt Walker were within .3s and all the other juniors 6s+ back.
Hannah qualifies first for the women, Rachel 15s back, maybe a crash?
Men running now:
http://www.uci.ch/mountain-bike/ucievents/2017-mountain-bike-uci-mountain-bike-world-cup-presented-by-shimano/162153117/widgets/live-timing-results
Looks like top 5 are Tbro, Mingnar, Vergier, Gwern, and Broni
Edit #2: Holy crap the Syndicate is on fire this year. Have they ever had a season where every one of their riders was a consistent top 10, and threat to win the race?
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I know it's prohibitively expensive, but I'd love to see qualifying runs broadcast too.
With all the live streaming service and phone technology out there, the track and website photogs could broadcast enough 30 second clips to make me waste half the work day.
With all the live streaming service and phone technology out there, the track and website photogs could broadcast enough 30 second clips to make me waste half the work day.
When it was just Rennie and Peat on WCs, yes.
6 pot Hopes:
LUCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
http://www.vitalmtb.com/news/news/RESULTS-Qualifying-at-the-2017-Andorra-World-Cup-DH,1062
http://www.vitalmtb.com/news/news/RESULTS-Qualifying-at-the-2017-Andorra-World-Cup-DH,1062
top 10 is STACKED
Yes 
Illes by like 5 seconds. Kade in 3rd. Not sure about second. Gotta think Walker.
Shiiiiiiiit. Fearon was hauling before that crash.
Hart WTF!!!!!
Ummmmm....so I'd say Hart prefers his 27.5's.
hm bruni with a minaar styled 27,5" riding was as fast as Hart's wild 27,5" riding. i wonder how a minaar styled 29" riding by the master himself will look like 
He is going to flat.i wonder how a minaar styled 29" riding by the master himself will look like
bam!