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Dear Audi, Your cars suck.

RUFUS

RUFUS

e-douche of the year
Dec 1, 2006
3,480
1
Denver, CO
Thanks to Skyst3alth and some guy from craigslist for the help on the alternator swap on my 2000 Audi A6 Avant this morning. We had to pick the morning that was 32* and out of the sun but it got done!

4 hours total work and only forgot to install on hose clamp, not too bad!

Now have to do the front end and then get rid of this damn car that is now practically brand new. I hate you Audi.

 
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spam16v

spam16v

Monkey
Oct 27, 2004
284
0
Buffalo, NY
WTF were you thinking removing the entire effin' front end? 3 10mm nuts on each side of the bumper in the fender liner which the wheels can be left on, 2 6mm allen bolts up through the rebar, remove bumper. 7 bolts T45, 3 on one, 4 on the other, remove the 6 t30 screws (one on each fender, two on each side of the core support) and SLIDE the front end forward on the bumper shocks about 2 inches. All you have to remove the lock carrier forward is to release the serp belt, and the upper 13mm bolt on the alternator that hits the core support. Not a drop of coolant spilled, don't even have to unplug either headlight. This is a sub hour job on a lift.... 2 hours on the ground if you're half baked.
 
drkenan

drkenan

anti-dentite
Oct 1, 2006
3,441
1
west asheville
When I had the ole S4, I would always pop the front end off to do jobs like that. It's so much easier than trying to squeeze your hand in there when trying to get the serp belt off. I got to the point where I could get the whole thing off in 20 minutes or so.

I never thought I'd miss my Audi(s) so much though - I only have a slow fwd car now.

Edit: Did the alternator have 3 bolts with the rear one being the biggest PITA ever? That was my experience and then I tried to leave the rear bolt out but it wouldn't line up with the serpentine belt properly without it. Utter PITA.
 
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RUFUS

RUFUS

e-douche of the year
Dec 1, 2006
3,480
1
Denver, CO
spam16v said:
WTF were you thinking removing the entire effin' front end? 3 10mm nuts on each side of the bumper in the fender liner which the wheels can be left on, 2 6mm allen bolts up through the rebar, remove bumper. 7 bolts T45, 3 on one, 4 on the other, remove the 6 t30 screws (one on each fender, two on each side of the core support) and SLIDE the front end forward on the bumper shocks about 2 inches. All you have to remove the lock carrier forward is to release the serp belt, and the upper 13mm bolt on the alternator that hits the core support. Not a drop of coolant spilled, don't even have to unplug either headlight. This is a sub hour job on a lift.... 2 hours on the ground if you're half baked.
Click to expand...
It was damn cold out and wasn't in the mood to squeeze around other parts with old plastic. It was MUCH easier to remove the front end. 4 hours total with the front end completely off.

We tried for a few minutes without the front end being removed, but just said F it and went on.
 
manhattanprjkt83

manhattanprjkt83

Rusty Trombone
Jul 10, 2003
9,646
1,216
Nilbog
I fvcking love my audi. except...

The costs of keeping it up, 2004 B6 S4 Nogaro blue...Had to pull the motor last year, cost me just north of 5k and i got a deal.

Damn fun to drive, but they can be a pain in the ass.
 
stevew

stevew

resident influencer
Sep 21, 2001
40,579
9,589
to borrow a line from burn notice....you know mtn bikers complaining about their cars....a bunch of bitchy little girls.
 
drkenan

drkenan

anti-dentite
Oct 1, 2006
3,441
1
west asheville
manhattanprjkt83 said:
Which S4 did you have?
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B5 Stage 3 - I started with a chipped car and ended up getting the mod bug. Pulled the engine/tranny by myself in my driveway in the middle of winter. Believe it or not, I really miss those days.

gonefirefightin said:
never had any good things to say about working on audis.....engineering crap
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After working on Audis for 8 years, Fords for about the same amount of time and my '74 International truck, I have to say that Audis really are pretty quality vehicles. It's really the turbos and electrical issues that give them such a bad name. If you pick up one of the old 2.8 V6 models and take care of it, those things will last forever.

I now have a 2011 VW and the quality isn't nearly as good. Little things like wind noise and are so much worse.
 
gonefirefightin

gonefirefightin

free wieners
Feb 5, 2007
11,252
4,926
Surrounded by Police in a hail of gunfire
drkenan said:
B5 Stage 3 - I started with a chipped car and ended up getting the mod bug. Pulled the engine/tranny by myself in my driveway in the middle of winter. Believe it or not, I really miss those days.



After working on Audis for 8 years, Fords for about the same amount of time and my '74 International truck, I have to say that Audis really are pretty quality vehicles. It's really the turbos and electrical issues that give them such a bad name. If you pick up one of the old 2.8 V6 models and take care of it, those things will last forever.

I now have a 2011 VW and the quality isn't nearly as good. Little things like wind noise and are so much worse.
Click to expand...
I have a few rigs that I buy on a regular basis

7.3 liter fords, pre 99 montero's, pre 02 sidekicks, and the occasional samurai.

I can rebuild all of these engines (complete) in a weekend and they are very easy to fab on.

the montero is by far the best commuter I have ever had in snow/ice. unbelievable rig for the money nowadays

I like to 4 link the sidekicks and sammies then resell them for major profit over the investment.
 
spam16v

spam16v

Monkey
Oct 27, 2004
284
0
Buffalo, NY
drkenan said:
B5 Stage 3 - I started with a chipped car and ended up getting the mod bug. Pulled the engine/tranny by myself in my driveway in the middle of winter. Believe it or not, I really miss those days.
Click to expand...
B5S4's are what I make a living on. Got a couple big turbo cars I babysit. Plain jane K04 on E85, 400whp, sub 3 fats time. Got another actual RS6 with modified turbos that scoots out pretty good, it's gotta go to get the transmission done or it'll puke soon. Want to talk about nightmare? Work on an RS6...
 
L

local717

Monkey
Apr 11, 2010
260
27
Mt.Gretna/Lancaster
I get into the argument all the time with a friend I ride with that is an auto mechanic. He hates everything, only likes his old chevy van and Hondas. I'm 33 and have pretty much only ever owned VW and Audi's. The way I look at it is, all cars suck, will eventually break, and cost you money. So at the end of the day, you gotta be happy with what you're throughing money at. For me, I'm ok throughing money at VW's and Audi's.
 
9

9nine9

Chimp
Apr 23, 2007
42
0
What's the red one in the pic?
Does it get any better with more recent (06 up) Audis? Really dig the Avants but consistently hear "too expensive to fix-too often".
 
SkaredShtles

SkaredShtles

Michael Bolton
Sep 21, 2003
65,646
12,706
In a van.... down by the river
local717 said:
I get into the argument all the time with a friend I ride with that is an auto mechanic. He hates everything, only likes his old chevy van and Hondas. I'm 33 and have pretty much only ever owned VW and Audi's. The way I look at it is, all cars suck, will eventually break, and cost you money. So at the end of the day, you gotta be happy with what you're throughing money at. For me, I'm ok throughing money at VW's and Audi's.
Click to expand...
Throwing money at a Honda:



Throwing money at a VAG:

 
spam16v

spam16v

Monkey
Oct 27, 2004
284
0
Buffalo, NY
< Honda Element owner, wife owns: Honda Element. 110k, owned since new 3 sets of tires, 2 sets of brakes (fluids etc) 1 brake caliper.
 
W

wreckedrex

Monkey
Feb 8, 2007
137
0
Fremont, CA
gonefirefightin said:
the montero is by far the best commuter I have ever had in snow/ice. unbelievable rig for the money nowadays
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Please tell me more. I need/want to replace my old toyota pickup with a wagon body for bike/camp/light expo type duty and I've read a couple times that the older monteros are a solid option.

Edit: I've had a few issues with my brothers 1.8t b4, but they've been ridiculously easy to diagnose and fix. Mostly because there are so many of them around and "they all do that"...
 
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Sandwich

Sandwich

Pig my fish!
Staff member
May 23, 2002
21,067
5,976
borcester rhymes
kickstand said:
Dear Rufus, everyone including Audi already knew this
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owned 4 i think...never again. well, maybe another urq when I have a garage and a six figure paycheck, and a second car, and the wife has her own car, and...

yeah no. I sold the german **** and bought something delightfully japanese. Not nearly as nice to drive or sit in, but OMG it runs.
 
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