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"There's a beauty pagent for idiots going on CNN right now"

DirtMcGirk

DirtMcGirk

<b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm
Feb 21, 2008
6,379
1
Oz
One of my friends said that about the Republican debate about "National Security" on CNN tonight.

Damn that man is astute.

It frightens me that America has gotten this stupid. When Ron Paul looks like a card carrying ACLU member, and Huntsman looks like he knows a lot about domestic terrorism, its really time for the GOP to consider a solution to all of this.

And then there's Michelle Bachmann. I suspect her daddy said "thank god she's pretty" a lot when that one was coming of age. Unfortunately she picked a husband who "prays the gay away" on a daily basis in a truck stop bathroom.

It makes me sad that I fought for this country when I see this. A nation divided cannot stand. So I guess I am going to get ready for it to fall apart. Need to stockpile ammo, bike tubes, lube and spare DH parts.
 
DirtMcGirk

DirtMcGirk

<b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm
Feb 21, 2008
6,379
1
Oz
Maybe I should run for the GOP nomination.

"Dangerously Retarded is still better than Perry!"
"They want to suck my dick, I don't force them to, so I'm better than Cain..."
"Nader is older than Jeebus, I'm like 1/10th his age. Vote for me..."

I could go on and on.
 
jonKranked

jonKranked

Detective Dookie
Nov 10, 2005
85,996
24,543
media blackout
DirtMcGirk said:
Maybe I should run for the GOP nomination.

"Dangerously Retarded is still better than Perry!"
"They want to suck my dick, I don't force them to, so I'm better than Cain..."
"Nader is older than Jeebus, I'm like 1/10th his age. Vote for me..."

I could go on and on.
Click to expand...
I'd vote for you. It's not like politicians ever keep their campaign promises anyways.
 
DirtMcGirk

DirtMcGirk

<b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm
Feb 21, 2008
6,379
1
Oz
The thing is, I'd just tell you I am really not going to give you jack sh!t. I'd be a figurehead, and with the exception of taking over British Columbia so that we can have cheaper tickets at Whistler, and the strippers in Vancouver must give free lap dances to American service members, I don't plan on doing very much.

At this point we're pretty much SOL as a nation. China, our biggest "Evil Empire," pretty much owns our ass. We back up Israel, which is one of the biggest human rights abusers, with the cost of our military members. America has hit the point of unsustainable debt vs. our GDP, but no one seems to really care.

And yet this brain trust says that our biggest enemies are the Islamists and the illegal immigrants. Are you kidding me? Did I miss something?

The only upside I have found is that Santorum's name now means something
You get from anal sex.
 
Polandspring88

Polandspring88

Superman
Mar 31, 2004
3,066
7
Broomfield, CO
It's funny you mention this because as of lately I've thought about what it would take to run for public office. You could simply state that there's no way you could possibly fvck things up any worse than they already are so what's the downside? You could literally do nothing and in reality it would be more productive than they are right now.
 
DirtMcGirk

DirtMcGirk

<b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm
Feb 21, 2008
6,379
1
Oz
You seem like you come from good stock. You can have an invite to my ranch in Colorado. However, bring your own guns, women (We're all for bigamy) and fermentables.
 
AngryMetalsmith

AngryMetalsmith

Business is good, thanks for asking
Jun 4, 2006
21,230
10,106
I have no idea where I am
I think this is why I love Zombie movies so much. I find the apocalypse appealing because it reduces mankind down to one simple scenario, survival. No status, wealth, debt or over inflated expectations of what life is supposed to be.
 
?

?????

Turbo Monkey
Jun 20, 2005
1,678
2
San Francisco
I haven't heard much from Huntsman yet other than the motorcycle campaign add was entertaining. He's made some good points tonight, and Ron Paul is consistantly good. I like Newt's cynicism. I wish the rest would go ahead and pack their bags, their awful and I can't imagine that there is much room for a president to get worse than Bush and Obama.
 
P

Pete..

Monkey
Feb 11, 2009
450
0
Santa Cruz
Romney is going to get the nomination. And if he doesn't, I don't think the Republicans have a chance at winning the presidential election.

Tea Party/radical conservatives don't have enough voters to win. Sure, people like Rick Perry and other 'flavors of the month' will rise and fall from the polls but they seriously mean nothing. The only thing that matters are the primaries.

Politics is a numbers game and there's no way that someone from the far end of either party would be able to win anything nationally. Legislative (you know, the most important branch of the government), of course. They might win within their districts and possibly entire states but a majority? I don't think so.

I guarantee that whichever Republican, no matter how conservative he/she is (or Democrat, no matter how liberal they are), will make a move towards the middle after they get a party nomination because they want to get the maximum amount of votes.

The Republican debates seriously are the most entertaining TV right now. It sucks now though cause they are starting to get more serious as the primaries are coming up.
 
?

?????

Turbo Monkey
Jun 20, 2005
1,678
2
San Francisco
Romney, while consistantly at the top, is just another John Kerry and the only thing he has going for him is the anti-Obama vote... and I wouldn't even vote for Romney over Obama. He gets very little enthusiastic support and I just don't think that enough people care enough about him to get out and vote, unless they are excited about voting against Obama. Newt Gingrich might weather the flavor of the month or else Ron Paul will begin his surge to the top. If that happens, the only person that could beat him would be Hillary Clinton... that would be a really crazy turn of events.
 
DirtMcGirk

DirtMcGirk

<b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm
Feb 21, 2008
6,379
1
Oz
These make me want to vote for Cain.
If Cain was Mike Tyson.

 
binary visions

binary visions

The voice of reason
Jun 13, 2002
22,100
1,150
NC
JohnE said:
The RM ticket...

Dirt for POTUS
GFF for VPOTUS
Click to expand...
I hope you want Boehner as a president. Dirt would be found dead within a week, buried in a pile of nubile white house interns and coke. GFF would accidentally off himself in his 437th accident, this one involving using Air Force One and a .50 sniper rifle for hunting deer.

And then we'd be left with Boehner.
 
norbar

norbar

KESSLER PROBLEM. Just cause
Jun 7, 2007
11,369
1,605
Warsaw :/
I wonder what's worse. US right wing idiots who think ipods are a product of divine creation or Polish right wing idiots who think history is a something between bible and porn.
 
DirtMcGirk

DirtMcGirk

<b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm
Feb 21, 2008
6,379
1
Oz
With GFF and I in office, me see a new era in Monkey prosperity coming across this great land of ours.

You're right though. I think we'd have to have a "We survived the first 100 days" party as both of us would be busy running this nation into a party it wasn't ready for.
 
jackalope

jackalope

Mental acuity - 1%
Jan 9, 2004
7,610
5,926
in a single wide, cooking meth...
If this noble plan does suceed, I would submit to thee that you consider re-working the Louisiana Purchase such that we get BC, and they get the Pelican state in return. If possible, I'd like to keep Nawlins (namely because Loonatic resides within), but I understand if they balk at the idea. As for talking points, I think it bears mentioning that it comes with French Creole speaking swamp people (i.e. P-spec will have someone to talk to), LSU plays great foosball and will likely win the Grey Cup on the regs, and they can lay claim to the wonderfully brilliant reality show "Swamp People". If this all works out, I would humbly request a couple acres outside of Kamloops, a new-ish double wide, a couple industrial ovens so I can cook up some high quality meth to compete with the locals, a Knolly Podium (medium), and enough cash to clone my aged dog.

All the best with your future endeavor!
 
DirtMcGirk

DirtMcGirk

<b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm
Feb 21, 2008
6,379
1
Oz
At this point I would be unwilling to give up Louisiana. This is largely because I am going to move the capitol of the United States there. Washington is really no place for people like GFF and me, it clashes with our natural desire to do dumb things involving firearms, booze, strippers, the occasionally super augmented bust we might meet on a night out, and of course my unhealthy obsession with penis puppetry.
 
Westy

Westy

the teste
Nov 22, 2002
54,442
20,248
Sleazattle
BV for pres. He'd just run the country the way it needed to. His history of fluffing appointments should really help with the conservative base.
 
DirtMcGirk

DirtMcGirk

<b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm
Feb 21, 2008
6,379
1
Oz
MMike said:
Would the country get free hepatitis shots?
Click to expand...
Just for that, first act as President is going to be deporting every Canadian, naturalized Canadian, and anyone who likes Canadian bacon. Only thing that we're keeping is Crown Royal, and that's on thin ice.
 
binary visions

binary visions

The voice of reason
Jun 13, 2002
22,100
1,150
NC
Westy said:
BV for pres. He'd just run the country the way it needed to. His history of fluffing appointments should really help with the conservative base.
Click to expand...
I would run the country the way I run this message board. With an cold, iron fist and a soft, warm nutsack heart.
 
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