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  • Come enter the Ridemonkey Secret Santa!

    We're kicking off the 2024 Secret Santa! Exchange gifts with other monkeys - from beer and snacks, to bike gear, to custom machined holiday decorations and tools by our more talented members, there's something for everyone.

    Click here for details and to learn how to participate.

Toshi

butthole powerwashing evangelist
Oct 23, 2001
39,750
8,749
pulp is the best.

fresh squeezed OJ full of it, mmm. just filter out the seeds kthxbye
 

stevew

resident influencer
Sep 21, 2001
41,161
10,100
pulp is the best.

fresh squeezed OJ full of it, mmm. just filter out the seeds kthxbye
not sure i have the patience to squeeze out about a gallons worth of oranges a day....
 

Toshi

butthole powerwashing evangelist
Oct 23, 2001
39,750
8,749
not sure i have the patience to squeeze out about a gallons worth of oranges a day....
yeah, it does take a surprisingly large pile of oranges to get a good pitcher of juice.
 

Jozz

Joe Dalton
Apr 18, 2002
6,158
7,856
SADL
Peel three oranges
Slice in halves
Put in Vitamix
Drink orange juice with pulp, but without pulp
Rinse pitcher
 

rideit

Bob the Builder
Aug 24, 2004
24,686
12,480
In the cleavage of the Tetons
So, I was doing some work at a hotel today. Clearly Mormon electrician blurts out (not sure what he was responding to), “Well, I love Jesus, but everybody knows that”.
It took all of my limited maturity not to respond “Well, I’ll bet you one shiny nickel that Jesus never knew that you even exist”.
But I was feeling generous, and just smiled.
 

jimmydean

The Official Meat of Ridemonkey
Sep 10, 2001
43,082
15,171
Portland, OR
I got lazy and went to Sandy's Barbershop here in town. Wash, dry, and cut for $25. I gave her $30 and felt it was fair.
 

Fool

The Thing cannot be described
Sep 10, 2001
2,919
1,669
Brooklyn
I remember being on the subway once, mortified without about half the train car watching a man housing a grapefruit like it was an apple -- rind and all. Just full-on front-teething into that motherfucker, tearing a chunk off and molaring the whole mess into some kinda rind-and-pulp, sour-ass grapefruit paste and swallowing it down. Train car smelt pleasantly of citrus during this crime against humanity, however.
 

SkaredShtles

Michael Bolton
Sep 21, 2003
67,827
14,165
In a van.... down by the river
I remember being on the subway once, mortified without about half the train car watching a man housing a grapefruit like it was an apple -- rind and all. Just full-on front-teething into that motherfucker, tearing a chunk off and molaring the whole mess into some kinda rind-and-pulp, sour-ass grapefruit paste and swallowing it down. Train car smelt pleasantly of citrus during this crime against humanity, however.
I'm impressed by his commitment to roughage. :homer:
 

AngryMetalsmith

Business is good, thanks for asking
Jun 4, 2006
22,055
12,773
I have no idea where I am
So, I was doing some work at a hotel today. Clearly Mormon electrician blurts out (not sure what he was responding to), “Well, I love Jesus, but everybody knows that”.
It took all of my limited maturity not to respond “Well, I’ll bet you one shiny nickel that Jesus never knew that you even exist”.
But I was feeling generous, and just smiled.
My parents who are in their 80s decided to make some adjustments to their cable tv/internet provider. I was of course on hand for whatever reason. It took every bit of restraint when my Mom kept telling the technician that she had a very old box that he needed to look at.
 
I remember being on the subway once, mortified without about half the train car watching a man housing a grapefruit like it was an apple -- rind and all. Just full-on front-teething into that motherfucker, tearing a chunk off and molaring the whole mess into some kinda rind-and-pulp, sour-ass grapefruit paste and swallowing it down. Train car smelt pleasantly of citrus during this crime against humanity, however.
I eat lemons, limes, and oranges peel and all, suspect that grapefruit would be just fine also.