"2006 Year of the Ugly Bike" -Vin Diesel Edition-


Turbo Monkey
Feb 28, 2005
Pa. / North Jersey
O.K. - I know this doesn't really have much to do with anything here, but I saw this in the other thread, went to the site and found it to be fu@#ing hilarious.

May I present to you the Vin Diesel Random Fact generator:

...everything you thought you knew about Vin and the nature of the universe... but were afraid to ask.

Vin Diesel's willpower is solid matter with a melting point equal to the temperature at the center of the sun. Portions of his willpower has been sold to several solar systems with dying suns, so that the extraterrestrial beings living there could start over "and make a proper go of it this time." The proceeds from these sales were used to build Vin a fortress of solitude in the ice caps at the north pole, where he now goes to practice speed-eating railroad spikes.
Just keep clicking on a rating or hit "refresh" on your browser...


Turbo Monkey
make it stop

one more

Vin Diesel was once the curator for a major metropolitan art museum. One weekend, every work in the museum was stolen at once. Vin was able to copy them all perfectly during a 14 hour cocaine binge while he had sex with 8000 supermodels. The only mistake was a single smudge of paint on the lapel of his otherwise immaculate white jacket.


Jul 9, 2004
San Jose, CA
Instead of chewing his food, Vin Diesel swallows his prey whole and then washes them down with battery acid and nail polish remover. Oh, and Vin realizes the battery acid destroys any nutrients from the food, you fool, but his ability to steal oxygen and nutrients from the Amazon Rain Forest keep him from being malnourished.


Delicate CUSTOM flower
Dec 11, 2001
Over your shoulder whispering
last 3 words
Vin Diesel can morph into an alpaca, and no matter how much you shear him, there is always more hair. Vin's hair in alpaca form in 80% steel, 15% flexible carbon-based polymer, and 5% unknown, highly radioactive isotope that scientists have nicknamed, "The Sperm Ruiner."