Blame the hippies. It's their goddam fault anyways.girlwhoboards said:
A lap dance is so much better when the stripper is crying.
- Thread starter DRB
- Start date
Its a terrible shame.Westy said:
The hippies ruin everything. :angry:girlwhoboards said:
I do love them. But they are the source of all ills......girlwhoboards said:so you are a hippie hater aye? they have there place you know otherwise life would get stale. it's like if you go to the beach and all the rocks where the same or you only had your choice of getting drip from starbucks. maybe you could learn to love the hippies
.
I never thought missing children could be so sexy,.. oops did I just say that out loud
Either went yuppie or moved to Bellingham. There's still some left in the woodwork too. I don't think anyone wants a lap-dance from anyone who hasn't bathed in 3 years.girlwhoboards said:
girlwhoboards said:so you are a hippie hater aye? they have there place you know otherwise life would get stale. it's like if you go to the beach and all the rocks where the same or you only had your choice of getting drip from starbucks
SS is a hippy. A short short wearing hippy.
LIAR!!DRB said:
Less hip than Bo Jackson.
Stuff up here has really been going to sh*t lately....hippies notwithstanding, people just seem to be losing their ballz...we're catering to the lowest common denominator all the time now, and, I for one, don't like it at all...SkaredShtles said:I've heard that things are really right-wing up there in Seattle.
[rant] Ohh...you don't like how I parallel parked?? Well, I'll get the city council to ban it.
Ohh...you don't want my sister-in-law to make enough money to put herself through school with a kid...??? Well, I'll get the city council to ban strip clubs. (actual story from my life 6 years ago...of course this was before, when she could make money... :angry: but now she has a different job! whew!)
[/rant]
Everyone's worried about everything all at once and they throw out panic-stricken edicts about what they think everyone else should be doing...
They need a good :nuts:
I'm going home and drinking my recently bought beer before anyone comes into my house and tells me I'm wrong and I can't do it anymore. This will be shortly followed by a shotgun cocking...
So, I decided to do what any good Christian would.
You can not imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice
and polish the one-eyed gopher when your doin' seventy-five
in an eighteen-wheeler.
You can not imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice
and polish the one-eyed gopher when your doin' seventy-five
in an eighteen-wheeler.
Oh, I find it such a thrill, when she grinds me against her will, yes a lapdance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
What, no freedom fries?MikeD said:
Geezus...
I was lonelier than kunta kinte at a merle haggard concert
That night i strolled on into uncle limpy's hump palace lookin' for love.
It had been a while.
In fact, three hundred and sixty-five had come and went
Since that midnight run haulin' hog to shakey town on i-10.
I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin' gallons
Through a pair of daisy duke cut-offs and one of those fruit of the loom tank-tops.
Well, that night i lost myself to ruby red lips,
Milky white skin and baby blue eyes.
Name was russell.
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well i find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well, faster than you can say, "shallow grave",
This pretty little thing come up to me and starts kneadin' my balls
Like hard-boiled eggs in a tube sock.
Said her name was bambi and i said, "well that's a coincidence darlin',
cause i was just thinkin' about skinnin' you like a deer."
Well she smiled, had about as much teeth as a jack-o-lantern,
And i went on to tell her how i would wear her face like a mask
As i do my little kooky dance.
And then she told me to shush.
I guess she could sense my desperation.
course, it's hard to hide a hard-on when you're dressed like minnie pearl.
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well i find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
So, bambi's goin' on about how she can make all my fantasies come true.
So i says, "even this one i have where jesus christ
Is jackhammering mickey mouse in the doo-doo hole
With a lawn dart as garth brooks gives birth to something
Resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on santa claus's tummy-tum?"
Well, ten beers, twenty minutes and thirty dollars later
I'm parkin' the beef bus in tuna town if you know what i mean.
Got to nail her back at her trailer.
Heh. that rhymes.
I have to admit it was even more of a turn-on
When i found out she was doin' me to buy baby formula.
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well i find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Day or so had passed when i popped the clutch,
Gave the tranny a spin and slid on into
The stinky pinky gulp n' guzzle big rig snooze-a-stop.
There i was browsin' through the latest issue of "throb",
When i saw bambi starin' at me from the back of a milk carton.
Well, my heart just dropped.
So, i decided to do what any good christian would.
You can not imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice
And polish the one-eyed gopher when your doin' seventy-five
In an eighteen-wheeler.
I never thought missing children could be so sexy.
Did i say that out loud?
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well i find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
That night i strolled on into uncle limpy's hump palace lookin' for love.
It had been a while.
In fact, three hundred and sixty-five had come and went
Since that midnight run haulin' hog to shakey town on i-10.
I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin' gallons
Through a pair of daisy duke cut-offs and one of those fruit of the loom tank-tops.
Well, that night i lost myself to ruby red lips,
Milky white skin and baby blue eyes.
Name was russell.
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well i find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well, faster than you can say, "shallow grave",
This pretty little thing come up to me and starts kneadin' my balls
Like hard-boiled eggs in a tube sock.
Said her name was bambi and i said, "well that's a coincidence darlin',
cause i was just thinkin' about skinnin' you like a deer."
Well she smiled, had about as much teeth as a jack-o-lantern,
And i went on to tell her how i would wear her face like a mask
As i do my little kooky dance.
And then she told me to shush.
I guess she could sense my desperation.
course, it's hard to hide a hard-on when you're dressed like minnie pearl.
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well i find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
So, bambi's goin' on about how she can make all my fantasies come true.
So i says, "even this one i have where jesus christ
Is jackhammering mickey mouse in the doo-doo hole
With a lawn dart as garth brooks gives birth to something
Resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on santa claus's tummy-tum?"
Well, ten beers, twenty minutes and thirty dollars later
I'm parkin' the beef bus in tuna town if you know what i mean.
Got to nail her back at her trailer.
Heh. that rhymes.
I have to admit it was even more of a turn-on
When i found out she was doin' me to buy baby formula.
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well i find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Day or so had passed when i popped the clutch,
Gave the tranny a spin and slid on into
The stinky pinky gulp n' guzzle big rig snooze-a-stop.
There i was browsin' through the latest issue of "throb",
When i saw bambi starin' at me from the back of a milk carton.
Well, my heart just dropped.
So, i decided to do what any good christian would.
You can not imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice
And polish the one-eyed gopher when your doin' seventy-five
In an eighteen-wheeler.
I never thought missing children could be so sexy.
Did i say that out loud?
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well i find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Fvck, Im tired. I got home late and im up early for work after the Bloodhound Gang in concert last night. Fort Worth's Ridglea Theater rocked. It was soo awsome! The new drummer kicksAss! Plenty of young boobies were in unobstructed attendance too. Evil Jared is a trip, Taking a beer bong to gulp a whole bottle of YAger. He vomited on Jimmy's shirt but jimmy played like nothing happened. You just had to be there. THey sounded fantastic and the new album is stellar!
dates
http://www.bloodhoundgang.com/index2.html
dates
http://www.bloodhoundgang.com/index2.html
MudGrrl said:
That's raw, who wrote it?
It was Phil Collins, not Liberace.MikeD said:
Was she crying because you paid her a $100 bill with loco's face on it???
girlwhoboards said:
Here you have to use a 4' dowel rod with a cloths pin on the end to 'tip' the dancers who wear more than what you can see at the pool.
N8 said:Was she crying because you paid her a $100 bill with loco's face on it???
Wow. Yeah. I'm really sorry I missed *that* spectacle.Jimmy_Pop said:
SkaredShtles said:LIAR!!
Where is DHG with the pics?
I'll translate it into hippie for you. Its like when a deadhead takes too much peyote and pukes on his buddy's dreads who doesn't notice cause he is beyond baked.SkaredShtles said:Wow. Yeah. I'm really sorry I missed *that* spectacle.
Do they smell like patchouli?DRB said:
The dreads, I mean.