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Alright, Pandemic/Zombie outbreak. Choose One Vehicle and Three Weapons.

DirtyMike

Turbo Fluffer
Aug 8, 2005
14,437
1,017
My own world inside my head
Yes, but those require life to perform and the undead brain lacks all of it. No blood flow, no oxygen, no electrical activity.

Unless of course some parasite is responsible for the electrical activity. But atrophy would severely limit any muscle activity outside the recently deceased. Most would be recently deceased, but in a matter of weeks wouldn't be worth a damn.
Zombies dont have zero brain activity, they have limited brain activity, which is why it generally takes a serious head trauma to stop them for sure.
 

DirtyMike

Turbo Fluffer
Aug 8, 2005
14,437
1,017
My own world inside my head
Sweet, that means I'm snagging your food and .338 Lapua when your 6.2 poops out on you!
Lapua makes a dependable weapon, Besides, if I see a gangly hipster with distorted tateus coming up towards my compound I will assume tis a zombie and take the head shot at minimum 300 yards long befor eyou ever get to my food.
ahahahaha that show was the best!

i'd take a sail boat full of food and fishing poles
an axe
a hi capacity 12ga shotty
and a .308 like an M14 or something
and a jet pack would be pretty cool to have too.
I am glad someone understands why I chose a .308 caliber weapon.......









Besides any of that, didn't anyone remember from the who would survive the zday thread that its going to end up being GFF and I plinking zombies at long range from our compound.... With the fifty plus acctrative women him and I pick up on the way we can repopulate the world once the time is right, and we will bring DirtMcgirk with us for entertainment purposes. Of course GFF is going to make a stop at the playboy mansion and I will yet again Eff up my number in the quick email and wont meet up with him till after that party, and will be stuck with sloppy seconds.... but its cool.
 

blackohio

Generous jaywalker
Mar 12, 2009
2,773
122
Hellafornia. Formerly stumptown.
I only hope I'm invited to the compound. I'll bring strippers, cocaine and ammo and jameson. I'll be the guy driving the paris dakkar rally truck with body parts all over it, so don't shoot.

I think I'm nixing the handgun in favor of


accurate, reliable and plentiful ammo. Maybe swap the masada out for the massoud .308 to keep all ammo to .308 and .12-ga.
 

4gnegative

Chimp
Sep 10, 2010
99
0
Orange Curtain
Zombies seem to be attracted too noises. In addition to everything else in the arsenal make sure you guys get a good supply of ghettoblasters and explosives.

On a side note, since they are attracted too noise I wonder if you could lead them into a giant EZ bake oven...
 

sanjuro

Tube Smuggler
Sep 13, 2004
17,373
0
SF
The amount of serious thought/responses in this thread is making me LOL at my desk.
How true.

BTW, I call the gun nuts in my screenplay "The Right". Not for any political viewpoints, but over their compound they have a banner, "WE WERE RIGHT!"

Sometimes the delusional paranoid are right...
 

TheMontashu

Pourly Tatteued Jeu
Mar 15, 2004
5,549
0
I'm homeless
Lapua makes a dependable weapon, Besides, if I see a gangly hipster with distorted tateus coming up towards my compound I will assume tis a zombie and take the head shot at minimum 300 yards long befor eyou ever get to my food



Besides any of that, didn't anyone remember from the who would survive the zday thread that its going to end up being GFF and I plinking zombies at long range from our compound.... With the fifty plus acctrative women him and I pick up on the way we can repopulate the world once the time is right, and we will bring DirtMcgirk with us for entertainment purposes. Of course GFF is going to make a stop at the playboy mansion and I will yet again Eff up my number in the quick email and wont meet up with him till after that party, and will be stuck with sloppy seconds.... but its cool.
Lolz, we can play that game. Here is where you screwed up, I can still put 5 shots under an inch at 200 yards with my .308 supported no problem, give me a rest and a clear day I'll shoot pretty close to the mechanical accuracy of a given gone with a rest (it aint that hard to do) My groups 2 months ago out at the 600 yard range weren't looking to shabby either for iron sights.

Done swagin the nut's yet? because only a fool would get a lapua for the excuse of reliability. Any mouser action will go bang every time. You're better off with a 700, plenty available parts to make them super accurate (I think our snipers use a 700 variant) with parts available from fully like 10-15% of hunting rifles in existence. Good luck shooting out past 300 yards though, I spent many nights on one of these http://www.scatt.com/ from the time I was ten through much of high school till I quit shooting all the time
 

DirtyMike

Turbo Fluffer
Aug 8, 2005
14,437
1,017
My own world inside my head
Lolz, we can play that game. Here is where you screwed up, I can still put 5 shots under an inch at 200 yards with my .308 supported no problem, give me a rest and a clear day I'll shoot pretty close to the mechanical accuracy of a given gone with a rest (it aint that hard to do) My groups 2 months ago out at the 600 yard range weren't looking to shabby either for iron sights.

Done swagin the nut's yet? because only a fool would get a lapua for the excuse of reliability. Any mauser action will go bang every time. You're better off with a 700, plenty available parts to make them super accurate (I think our snipers use a 700 variant) with parts available from fully like 10-15% of hunting rifles in existence. Good luck shooting out past 300 yards though, I spent many nights on one of these http://www.scatt.com/ from the time I was ten through much of high school till I quit shooting all the time
I dont need to "swag the nutts to know I can shoot extremly well. I also dont need a clear wind free day to put it on target either. I def dont need to brag about shooting since I was ten to prove I am better at it. 300 yards is a cakewalk shot for me, specially scoped, that just means I can see the white of the eyes when I pull the trigger........ Lets just put it like this, to this day, I have never had to tracka deer more than 20 yards form the position I made the shot before it dropped. I can put it in the heart every time.



But hey, you have been shooting since you were a kid, so that means you know more on the subject..... even though you cannot spell mauser to begin with, but nice try.

For the record, my wife can lay a consistent 1 in pattern at 200 yards with the .308, and she is pretty much a novice shooter so thats really not bragging much.
 

TheMontashu

Pourly Tatteued Jeu
Mar 15, 2004
5,549
0
I'm homeless
I dont need to "swag the nutts to know I can shoot extremly well. I also dont need a clear wind free day to put it on target either. I def dont need to brag about shooting since I was ten to prove I am better at it. 300 yards is a cakewalk shot for me, specially scoped, that just means I can see the white of the eyes when I pull the trigger........ Lets just put it like this, to this day, I have never had to tracka deer more than 20 yards form the position I made the shot before it dropped. I can put it in the heart every time.



But hey, you have been shooting since you were a kid, so that means you know more on the subject..... even though you cannot spell mauser to begin with, but nice try.

For the record, my wife can lay a consistent 1 in pattern at 200 yards with the .308, and she is pretty much a novice shooter so thats really not bragging much.

Congrats your nuts hang lower than mine, and so are your wife's. I'm to busy with school, work, and freshly legal pussy, to spend the several days a week required to be good at shooting.
 
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CrabJoe StretchPants

Reincarnated Crab Walking Head Spinning Bruce Dick
Nov 30, 2003
14,163
2,484
Groton, MA
Fights between Mooshu and DirtyMike remind of arguments you see in Dunkin Donuts between the two mid-50's mentally handicapped guys in wheelchairs and baseball helmets that live down the road in an assisted living home.
 

William42

fork ways
Jul 31, 2007
3,934
676
what the fyck do you need bullet proof armor for? you're fighting zombies. They use their hands and teeth. They wont make it through a regular cars body work. Lugging around an extra 3000lbs is stupid.

And don't get me started on the stupidness of wanting a car that gets 10 miles to the gallon or less. If you drive frugally, you have maybe 2 weeks of driving. 4 banger at ~25-30mpg is the way to go.
 

CrabJoe StretchPants

Reincarnated Crab Walking Head Spinning Bruce Dick
Nov 30, 2003
14,163
2,484
Groton, MA
And don't get me started on the stupidness of wanting a car that gets 10 miles to the gallon or less. If you drive frugally, you have maybe 2 weeks of driving. 4 banger at ~25-30mpg is the way to go.
That's a moot point as most vehicles size their fuel tanks accordingly to get around the same distance per tank. A 30mpg car with a 10gal fuel tank has the same range as a 10mpg truck with a 30gal tank.

Also, I think the appeal of a big, 4WD, armored vehicle isn't being "zombie-proof".....it's knowing you can get anywhere, through anything without getting stuck/damaged. Zombies might not be able to claw their way into your little Tercel, but the first time you come to a rubble strewn road you're fvcked.
 
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ultraNoob

Yoshinoya Destroyer
Jan 20, 2007
4,504
1
Hills of Paradise
That's a moot point as most vehicles size their fuel tanks accordingly to get around the same distance per tank. A 30mpg car with a 10gal fuel tank has the same range as a 10mpg truck with a 30gal tank.

Also, I think the appeal of a big, 4WD, armored vehicle isn't being "zombie-proof".....it's knowing you can get anywhere, through anything without getting stuck/damaged. Zombies might not be able to claw their way into your little Tercel, but the first time you come to a rubble strewn road you're fvcked.
^^^ This.

Also, you may have to escape other survivors who wish to pillage on your preparedness. They may have guns.... that kevlar lined door or 1" steel plating may just save your life.
 

IH8Rice

I'm Mr. Negative! I Fail!
Aug 2, 2008
24,524
494
Im over here now
what the fyck do you need bullet proof armor for? you're fighting zombies. They use their hands and teeth. They wont make it through a regular cars body work. Lugging around an extra 3000lbs is stupid.
not only are you fighting zombies with sometimes near super human strength, you are also protecting yourself from the other survivors who want your awesome, up-armored vehicle.
 

blackohio

Generous jaywalker
Mar 12, 2009
2,773
122
Hellafornia. Formerly stumptown.
I don't know how well William42 will sleep at night in his accord, but I'll be sleeping just fine inside my unicat. Come time when the horde has surrounded me. Well I'll just fire up my turbo diesel, throw her into low and simply drive over them on my way out of dodge. I'd like to see some gas miser drive through a crowd of 50 zombies. The unicat or other diesel beasts posted here are designed to crawl and climb their way out of most things. As for body armor, No harm in wearing bulletproof stuff. Infact anytime I went scavenging I'd probably wear all the mtb armor. Keep the bitable surface area to a minimum.

Also, you know how/why people die in these movies? Constantly moving around, new environments present new dangers. My high snowy bluff in the cascades will give me protection from both the undead as well as the living. Human tissue doesn't like freezing cold, especially human tissue kicking it day/night in it's PJ's.

I love how everyone thinks they'll just keep moving around. Im gonna drive the 1.5 hours up into the forrest surround Mt.Hood. Find a good remote location with good overwatch possibilities. Defend from as high as possible against both Lord Humongous and the undead.
 

TheMontashu

Pourly Tatteued Jeu
Mar 15, 2004
5,549
0
I'm homeless
You really are just retarded aren't you?
Ummm, apparently. But you do realize you're even dumber for getting butt hurt. Do you shoot 2-4 days a week out of curiosity? You loose half the skill you gained from your last practice.

Seriously dude, I was a master level high power and small bore 3 and 4 position shooter. I qualified for nationals 3 years in a row (didn't have the money to go) I may not know that much about guns, but I know how to shoot well. I know what it takes to be a great shooter, and I'm not one any more.
 

Sandwich

Pig my fish!
Staff member
May 23, 2002
21,088
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borcester rhymes
I like movies like 28 days later since it kind of hypothesizes that "Zombies" are really just crazy/angry people that are still living but their thought process is dead. I'm not a big fan of the "magic" zombies like you see on walking dead that can be made up of little more than leather and bone but still be moving.

Anyways....I agree that all zombies can apparently hear, but not all can swim. A sailboat is a fantastic idea, since you should never run out of gas. I'd sail my lame ass to some lame island and live on it, then poach other islands for food until I run out. Then you could sail back to the mainland once most of zee zombies are dead.
 

DirtMcGirk

<b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm
Feb 21, 2008
6,379
1
Oz
I bought a ton of that zombie-max stuff. Its just the critical defense stuff from Hornady with green tips. Seems to work pretty well. Nothing in comparison to the Corbon all copper stuff, which is downright nasty, but its a lot cheaper.

Wish the buckshot came out green though.
 

dhmike

Turbo Monkey
Dec 20, 2006
4,304
43
Boise Idaho
I"Anyways....I agree that all zombies can apparently hear, but not all can swim. A sailboat is a fantastic idea, since you should never run out of gas. I'd sail my lame ass to some lame island and live on it, then poach other islands for food until I run out. Then you could sail back to the mainland once most of zee zombies are dead."
this idea has already been tried and failed in the remake of dawn of the dead .
 

blackohio

Generous jaywalker
Mar 12, 2009
2,773
122
Hellafornia. Formerly stumptown.
Exactly with the islands. they would be the worst places. At least any relatively close to and landfall. Once the infection hits it's game over. Everyone trapped on a small place. Then once zombies they got no where to dissipate to.
 

ultraNoob

Yoshinoya Destroyer
Jan 20, 2007
4,504
1
Hills of Paradise
Since true zombies don't breathe, what's stopping them from walking on the sea floor? Say a zombie on a boat falls overboard. Sinks to the bottom since he doesn't breathe and won't implode cuz water will fill the lungs. Couldn't they just walk indefinitely, to say.... an island?
 

skibunny24

Enthusiastic Receiver of Reputation
Jun 16, 2010
3,281
585
Renton, WA
Since true zombies don't breathe, what's stopping them from walking on the sea floor? Say a zombie on a boat falls overboard. Sinks to the bottom since he doesn't breathe and won't implode cuz water will fill the lungs. Couldn't they just walk indefinitely, to say.... an island?
Hence the submarine. Wait for all the zombie to converge in an area and blow 'em to smithereens!
 

ultraNoob

Yoshinoya Destroyer
Jan 20, 2007
4,504
1
Hills of Paradise
Hence the submarine. Wait for all the zombie to converge in an area and blow 'em to smithereens!
Your Boomer concept would work if you had both launch keys, launch codes, and were able to reprogram the targeting solutions which already pre programmed into the system. Hopefully the crew is still unzombified and can assist you in your thermo nuclear zombie annihilation strategy.
 

blackohio

Generous jaywalker
Mar 12, 2009
2,773
122
Hellafornia. Formerly stumptown.
In WWZ, Max talks about all the zombies that stumble into lakes and oceans and endless mill around. Yet another reason to hear up into the mountains with isolated water sources. The odds of them wandering that far into the cold/snow helps eliminate a lot of those issues. Plus I'll let the rest of you see how drinking rotting corpse water does for the immune system.

Plenty of pine trees up here to chop down, cut up into a fence and build sentry posts. Maybe I'm writing The Village?
 

Mr Jones

Turbo Monkey
Nov 12, 2007
1,475
0
Vehicle:
Light armored Humvee with mattracks upgrade



Weapon 1:
Browning buckmark, silenced



Weapon 2:
Colt Modular Carbine with 762NATO AND 556 NATO kits



Weapon 3:
Claymore strapped to my chest as last resort

 

DirtyMike

Turbo Fluffer
Aug 8, 2005
14,437
1,017
My own world inside my head
The thought os MPG for when zombie land happens makes me laugh. I will stick with my original true Humvee with light armor, take my 10MPG... Only have to drive far enough to get to a safe area and setup a compund. From there only time it needs to run is if you need to make a supply scavenge and being deisel fuel options are abundant.


Although after putting a little more thought into it, the .357 is great for removing zombie heads are fair close range, but I think I will swap that item for the Springfeild 1911A1. Another dependable and accurate weapon that will remove a zombie's head with higher capacity and a quicker reload. Still a pretty easy round to find as well. Of course I would take the Current 1911A1 I have that is already compensated and flash supressed....