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amazon´s review for the $87k watch

ALEXIS_DH

Tirelessly Awesome
Jan 30, 2003
6,151
798
Lima, Peru, Peru
http://www.amazon.com/Zenith-96-0529-4035-Tourbillon-Titanium-Chronograph/dp/B001K3IXW8/ref=pd_rhf_p_t_2

Best Watch Ever!, November 27, 2009
By Jon McAwesome (Awesomeville, SC (pop. 1)) - See all my reviews
T
his review is from: Zenith Men's 96.0529.4035/51.M Defy Xtreme Tourbillon Titanium Chronograph Watch (Watch)

The Zenith Men's Defy Xtreme Tourbillon Titanium Chronograph Watch or Z.M.D.X.T.B.T.C.M. as I like to call it, is by far the most awesome watch. Chuck Norris riding into the Super Bowl on the back of Godzilla and round house kicking the crowd is no where near as awesome as this priceless poon magnet. When I was just moments from sending my $100k to some needy neo-hippie help group, I stumbled onto this gem. It was like the heavens opened and Jesus himself appeared with this same watch on. I mean how can you not follow Jesus when he's rocking a watch of this caliber. So I asked "What would Jesus do?" Jesus pimp smacked me and said "Forget those hippies, buy the watch!" I was like "HECK YEAH." I busted out my Discover card and bought this rocking piece of art. I mean its art but its also practical too. Like when I take my summer trips to the Marianas Trench, I have no more worries that I am going to miss Tea Time back on the yacht, because water ruined my watch again. It can withstand the immense pressures of the deep due to the wicked awesome titanium. Deep seas, cant beat this. Bullets cant beat this. Heck, I can deflect cruise missiles and the apocalypse. With a watch like this you don't need to tell time, you tell people what time it is.
:weee:
 

mandown

Poopdeck Repost
Jun 1, 2004
21,355
8,793
Transylvania 90210
don't miss the savings
Buy any two watches from Perfect Timing and receive a $25.00 Amazon.com Gift Certificate. If the two watches total to $1500.00, you'll receive a $100.00 certificate instead, and if the watches total $6000.00 you'll receive a $500.00 certificate.
 

ICEBALL585

Bacontard
Sep 8, 2009
6,817
2,078
.:585:.
This review is pretty funny but nothing beats all of the amazon reviews of the 3 Wolves Moon Shirt...

http://www.amazon.com/Mountain-Three-Wolf-Short-Sleeve/dp/B002HJ377A


5.0 out of 5 stars Dual Function Design, November 10, 2008
By B. Govern "Bee-Dot-Govern" (New Jersey, USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME) This review is from: The Mountain Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve Tee (Apparel)
This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that's when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to 'howl at the moon' from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn't have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.

I arrived at Wal-mart, mounted my courtesy-scooter (walking is such a drag!) sitting side saddle so that my wolves would show. While I was browsing tube socks, I could hear aroused asthmatic breathing behind me. I turned around to see a slightly sweaty dream in sweatpants and flip-flops standing there. She told me she liked the wolves on my shirt, I told her I wanted to howl at her moon. She offered me a swig from her mountain dew, and I drove my scooter, with her shuffling along side out the door and into the rest of our lives. Thank you wolf shirt.

Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the 'guns'), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.