I am working on my Best Man Speech Im trying to come up with a killer ending. Any help would be GREATLY appreciated !!!!!!!
Best Man Speech
- Thread starter Konabumm
- Start date
I think I have to come up with a decent speech as the maid of honor.
I suck at the wedding thing.
(maybe that should be my first line)
I suck at the wedding thing.
(maybe that should be my first line)
Make out with the brides mother and then shout "thank you and good night", then fall off stageKonabumm said:
konabumm, knowing yr proclivities, you gotta work in a reference to nailing the bride.
and her mom.
at the same time.
and her mom.
at the same time.
I like my cousin's ending to the speach he gave at his brother's wedding.
"As the best man, I knew I was going to have certain responsibilities, I had to get him here on time, looking good and sober...I guess two out of three isn't so bad, but what did you all expect, I'm not a plastic surgeon."
"As the best man, I knew I was going to have certain responsibilities, I had to get him here on time, looking good and sober...I guess two out of three isn't so bad, but what did you all expect, I'm not a plastic surgeon."
BadDNA said:
nice one. I was supposed to be best man in a wedding this summer (like july) but last I heard he (my buddy) had had a fling w/ a friend from high school, the fiancee found out, and the wedding got "pushed back" (my guess is to the 12th of never)
Maybe you could add in the Man's Prayer from the Red/Green show:
I'm a man
but I can change
if I have to...
I guess...
I'm a man
but I can change
if I have to...
I guess...
I finish up with something like "So in conclusion, Id like to say "Wear a rubber" cause she used to "get around" from what Ive heard"
maybe you can send us pics of the groom, and we can photoshop his head on another dude who's doing a chick..
then you can tape the pictures under the chair and tell everyone at a certain time .....
and this is why I dont think my best friend should be married to her..
and maybe the pic would be of him and Oprah?
brainstorming hurts sometimes.
then you can tape the pictures under the chair and tell everyone at a certain time .....
and this is why I dont think my best friend should be married to her..
and maybe the pic would be of him and Oprah?
brainstorming hurts sometimes.
"Oh, and I pissed in one of the champagne glasses, bottoms up!"
There is green rep written all over this post.Jim Mac said:
bwahahaha, just don't ask tn for help. His speech was terrible and lasted all of three seconds.
Here's to you and here's to me,
and I hope we never disagree.
But, if that should ever be,
to HELL with you, here's to ME!
and I hope we never disagree.
But, if that should ever be,
to HELL with you, here's to ME!
Ha, I just "helped" out a co-worker on writing a toast she had to give last weekend at her friends wedding. Sadly she didnt' get my sense of humor and didn't use any of the 3 I wrote. At first she said she wanted it short and sweet, I said i can do that and this is what I came up with:
"What is love? (pause) Baby don't hurt me."
What's shorter and sweeter than that? Well that got nixed, she said to be more serious, Okay I can do that.
"What is a wedding toast? Are we in a giant convection oven of love, getting our hearts warmed by these two hot heating elements? (gesture to couple) Here's to you two, may your buns be done and your love burn with a 1000 BTUs."
Sadly that got vetoed. So I made one final attempt, I wrote all this sappy crap out, but in between every sappy little saying I put a divorce or domestic violence statistic, so it read like this...
".....Love is that last thought of someone special right before you fall asleep. Did you know 50% of marriages fail in the first 3-5 years?......The only thing more comforting than a mother's hug, is one from your spouse. Studies suggest that between 3.3 - 10 million children witness some form of domestic violence annually...."
So if you need my help, let a brutha know.
"What is love? (pause) Baby don't hurt me."
What's shorter and sweeter than that? Well that got nixed, she said to be more serious, Okay I can do that.
"What is a wedding toast? Are we in a giant convection oven of love, getting our hearts warmed by these two hot heating elements? (gesture to couple) Here's to you two, may your buns be done and your love burn with a 1000 BTUs."
Sadly that got vetoed. So I made one final attempt, I wrote all this sappy crap out, but in between every sappy little saying I put a divorce or domestic violence statistic, so it read like this...
".....Love is that last thought of someone special right before you fall asleep. Did you know 50% of marriages fail in the first 3-5 years?......The only thing more comforting than a mother's hug, is one from your spouse. Studies suggest that between 3.3 - 10 million children witness some form of domestic violence annually...."
So if you need my help, let a brutha know.
I should have known that this was the wrong place to ask for help
DO you own tear-away/Chippendales pants?
dogwonder said:
So good. I am not a best man for this wedding later but I am the best friend of the bride. She really wanted me to make a speach. This is the same girl I am donating my kidney to on the 30th.
