Funny ass stuff
Chuck Norris To ride for Canfield Brothers in 06'
- Thread starter wingman24
- Start date
I'm thinking up my next Avy/Fox Dhx tread as we speak.
These ones rule.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.
Chuck Norris doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.
Chuck Norris doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
man, you are so dead, make peace with this world, I feel for you.H8R said:
The normal human being has 36 cromosomes, Chuck Norris has 72...all are poisonous.
I heard Chuck Norris used to be an insurance processor and one time he turned his monthly reports in late. 
Chuck Norris once was mugged in New York City.
The mugger demanded his money, and, instead of handing over his wallet, Chuck Norris delivered a roundhouse kick to the mugger's chest.
Unfortunately, Chuck is a puny weakling and the mugger, instead of dying as many of you would expect, laughed and shot Chuck in the face.
Now, Chuck is dead and we don't have to hear these jokes anymore.
The mugger demanded his money, and, instead of handing over his wallet, Chuck Norris delivered a roundhouse kick to the mugger's chest.
Unfortunately, Chuck is a puny weakling and the mugger, instead of dying as many of you would expect, laughed and shot Chuck in the face.
Now, Chuck is dead and we don't have to hear these jokes anymore.
doublebinary visions said:
Chuck Norris has secretly kept a speech for an Oscar win for the last 25 years. It starts, "I can't ****ing believe this either, but..."
When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
Chuck Norris is also the derivative of the universe. But if you try and integrate him, all you will get is the true name of God. Plus C.
It is mathmaticaly impossible for both Chuck Norris And Sam Hill to be the derivative of the universe, so redo the math and show your work, which one is it Sam Hill OR Chuck Norris?:love:manhattanprjkt83 said:
When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
DAMNIT! Thought these lounge people didnt know much about DH.wingman24 said:
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take **** from anybody.
Westy said:
I thought you were going to say something about "true grit". No wait, that's John Wayne. Nevermind.
I once smoked a lock of Chuck Norris's hair, I got so high that the secret of the universe unfolded before my eyes, unfortunatly I have been unable to comprehend it because I'm not Chuck Norris.
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck norris?
All of it.
All of it.
Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
please change your avatar
Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'til." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
The human mind is too simple to understand Chuck Norris.the Inbred said:
Chuck Norris can put a WRAPED starburst in his mout, and then pull it out UNWRAPED... Norris for President.
Chuck Norris once raped a grape starburst and it turned into a strawberry starburst.
Bicyclist said:
That thead is wack, I was just there and Chuck norris is there with Sam Hill Laying down the law.
chuck norris pooped a hammer.
DAMN thats skill, but beat this, Chuck norris once took a rabbit, smashed it into a house, and boom! a frigin horse appeared.
That was tereble, and it would be totaly impossable if it wasn't chuck norris.
And than what, because Chuck Norris Poops out a hammer evey day, which is no great feat for chuck norris.gnurider1080 said:
Im going to bed, ill tell Chucl you guys said hi :dancing:
I am Going to bed also, please tell me your not sleeping with chuck norris, because I've always wanted to do that.greg447 said:
