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CoWorker MindF@%*s?

stinkyboy

Plastic Santa
Jan 6, 2005
15,187
1
¡Phoenix!
Did that chick get in the sh*t?
Nah, he just embarassed himself by being such a pvssy.

We're moving into a new building and some people now have to share offices. All of the "sharies" have complained to their bosses that they don't want to be in an office with him.

Maybe I'll just point that out...
 

pedalkicker

Monkey
Jun 3, 2008
288
0
earth
Definately got to go with the Craigslist prank. Post his email/phone number in the free stuff section for something of value like a goat. Or buy one of these and hide it in his office.

Thinkgeek's Annoy-a-tron 2.0:
Drive your "friends" crazy - again

Now with six sound choices including the Infamous Teen Buzz tone and volume control!

Now that they've mostly recovered from the twisted mind maze that was the original Annoy-a-tron, send them on a new journey of "self discovery" with version 2.0 Now featuring 6 sound choices plus volume control, it's at least twice as fun (and annoying) as the original. For effective deployment, we humbly suggest the following sound and volume combinations, but you can conduct your own field research for more insight.

* 15kHz (Teen Buzz tone** - young folks can hear it, older folks cannot!) (full volume)
* Cricket chirping (medium/low volume)
* IM Doorbell (low volume)
* Grating Electronic noise (full volume)
* Typical Electronic Beep (medium volume)

The cricket chirping sound is interesting because someone will instinctively look near the ground when trying to locate a cricket. So, placing the Annoy-a-tron several feet or more above the ground will help to obscure its location. The 15kHz sound is also interesting because this frequency range of sound cannot be heard by everyone. In older adults or those with deteriorated hearing (a condition known as presbycusis) this high frequency sound will not be audible, while others will clearly hear the sound and find it quite annoying. They also might think they are going crazy because people nearby will report that they don't hear anything.

Assuming you have done your part in selecting a suitable hiding location for the Annoy-a-tron, it will do its part to drive your co-workers slowly mad with its short and seemingly random beeps. And when someone does locate the Annoy-a-tron, they're not going to know what it is - which is almost as much fun as watching them search for it. Muahaha...

The Annoy-a-tron 2.0 takes one CR2450 battery (included) and measures approximately: 2.5" x 1.5" x .35". It will run for over 4 weeks on a single battery.

** - The 'Teen Buzz Tone' is a frequency that young people can hear but older folks cannot. Sometimes younger folks cannot hear it and sometimes older folks can hear it, but, in general, it's called the 'Teen Buzz' tone. When you can hear it, trust us, it's annoying. Dogs agree.

o Six sounds choices: beep, 12 kHz electronic noise sound, 15kHz, cricket, doorbell, alternating between all sounds
o Volume knob
o Two magnets for great hiding ability
 

CrabJoe StretchPants

Reincarnated Crab Walking Head Spinning Bruce Dick
Nov 30, 2003
14,163
2,484
Groton, MA
Do what I did, steal his car keys at the end of the night/day.

It was 5 minutes before we were heading home for the night(9pm) and the guy was looking all over for his keys. He had to call his wife to pick him up. At first I just threw them in some bushes and after a few days I took them out of the bushes and put them in my car. Now I will randomly set off his panic alarm during the day when he is with customers or on the phone. He has taken his car to get looked at multiple times because of the "malfunctioning" alarm. They can't figure out what is wrong :imstupid:
- repped

It's d!cks like you that turn casual fun into a pissing match.
 

mandown

Poopdeck Repost
Jun 1, 2004
20,126
7,674
Transylvania 90210
A classic:
Finally, this was one I did in college. My first year in the dorms, I
would keep a bottle of root beer which someone would continually drink
without my knowing. After I couldn't stand it anymore, I went to a friend
in the chem dept. and asked him for an acid/base indicator that turns base
pink (I forget what the indicator was), and put a bit in my root beer
bottle. The plan was that human urine is somewhat base, so when the
culprit drank my root beer, he began to pee pink. Needless to say, about
12 hours later, this guy thought he was gonna die!
Methylene Blue is what you want.
 

Straya

Monkey
Jul 11, 2008
863
3
Straya
Buy some engine oil and every so often pour about half a cup of it on the ground under the engine of his car. "accidentally" park near him and walk out to the car at the same time and comment on the oil stains.

He'll take his car to a mechanic multiple times and have arguments with him over why he's paying and the mechanic isn't fixing the problem.

(just realised you bike commute, I'm sure you can sort something out, you seem the devious type. Perhaps get someone else in on the joke).

I've also heard of people taking the car keys, cutting a spare set, and then returning the originals. They then reprogrammed all the radio channels on the stereo every day. Again he was on the phone to a mechanic all the time. (this may not be possible with modern car keys and both tricks are a bit of a nasty trick to pull on the poor mechanics)
 

Austin Bike

Turbo Monkey
Jan 26, 2003
1,558
0
Duh, Austin
If you stick a paper clip in the usb port and jiggle it around it will cause the computer to think new hardware was installed. The mouse and keyboard will no longer work until you unplug them and replug them. I love sitting in shop and turning around to the guy who sits behind me and making his mouse and keyboard not work.
Wait until the company has to buy him a new computer or the IT guy wastes 2 hours of his life trying to troublehoot that. Once they figure out it was you, your ass will be on the street.

Why waste your time with college if you're gonna have an employment record full of firings?
 

Wumpus

makes avatars better
Dec 25, 2003
8,161
153
Six Shooter Junction
Wait until the company has to buy him a new computer or the IT guy wastes 2 hours of his life trying to troublehoot that. Once they figure out it was you, your ass will be on the street.

Why waste your time with college if you're gonna have an employment record full of firings?

Don't get in such a huff...it's only school property.
 

jebfour

Turbo Monkey
Jun 19, 2003
2,059
1,400
CLT, NC
Wow.

Offices do weird things to otherwise sane individuals.

Yep. I don't recommend working in one if you can avoid it....


EDIT: This is the RideMonkey lounge - most are borderline sane at best.
 
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boostindoubles

Nacho Libre
Mar 16, 2004
7,838
6,145
Yakistan
When I was a kid we would play pranks on each other by twisting staples into small ass tacks and set them on each others chairs. That was fun stuff back in the day but probably not appropriate for an office. Anyone ever do this? Those things were quite a surprise to sit down on.

 

Austin Bike

Turbo Monkey
Jan 26, 2003
1,558
0
Duh, Austin
Nice avatar boost. The original is down the street from me on the side of a fast food place across the street from the university of tx.

 

cannondalejunky

ease dropper
Jun 19, 2005
2,924
2
Arkansas
how gullible is he....if you're IT guys can have remote access to his computers, bribe them and get them to have one of these messages pop up on his computer....the IT guys can put anything they want in the message for the reason it's going to shut down. we had a lady at work who is VERY gullible and they put one on her computer that said it was shutting down because of "nuclear shield failure" ...she FREAKED out and started frantically trying to shut her computer down



this same woman we also did a prank from "the office" to her...we stole her phone and put it on top of the ceiling tile above her and called the phone throughout the day...she searched for that phone forever
 

jebfour

Turbo Monkey
Jun 19, 2003
2,059
1,400
CLT, NC
I promise to provide a full report :cheers:
So I've been doing this most of the morning. I'll look at the dude's ear with a WTF look on my face and then look away real quick. I think he's staring to wonder what the hell is going on....

:rofl:
 

AngryMetalsmith

Business is good, thanks for asking
Jun 4, 2006
21,075
9,778
I have no idea where I am
So I've been doing this most of the morning. I'll look at the dude's ear with a WTF look on my face and then look away real quick. I think he's staring to wonder what the hell is going on....

:rofl:
Nice touch sir.

I bet he starts rubbing the ear in question by the end of the day.

Next week we'll see if we can make him think he has body odor.