[DirtMcGirk]

After my divorce I fell apart, moved out of my apartment, things were not good. I left it dirty. But not $2000 worth of dirty.

My exwife was on the lease with me, as we were still married when I moved to Reno and she was deployed in Afghanistan.

So now its gone to collections. Haven't had the money to pay them off, and they refuse to show me a copy of the damages. They never did a walk through with me, and in Nevada that cuts down the liability on my end.

But where I am really butthurt is where the debt collector is calling my exwife and saying things like "I pray you don't promote in the Navy because of this. Debtors shouldn't be allowed to serve this country. I'm going to see to it that you don't get a residency or promote."

I want to rip this fvcker's eyes out of his skull and screw the holes.

I've told him I'll pay them when a. I have the money and b. I've seen a list of the damages. He then went so far as to tell me that he won't give me anything, and will make sure he'll get it from my ex as "She's a doctor, she's got the money..."

I think he's about to get introduced to the Fair Debt Collection Act. I've got a bar license in Florida. Its on.

/rant

 

[4xBoy]

Screw him good.

 

[stoney]

Debtors. Why can't we jail them?
But yes, take him to small claims, screw him silly lawyer man.

 

[DirtMcGirk]

We're no longer in pre-Industrial Revolution England?

I'm going to bend him over and stick it in, and if he works for a company, Respondent Superior is going to be my friend.

 

[rockofullr]

make sure you give us a play-by-play of all the bending over and such!

 

[reflux]

I think he's about to get introduced to the Fair Debt Collection Act. I've got a bar license in Florida. Its on.

/rant

Debt collectors who don't play by the rules are major scum of the planet. Good on you for being familiar with the Fair Debt Collections Act. You are clearly smarter than the average citizen, but please tell us that you've been keeping a thorough and precise log of all contact made from and with this trash. When push comes to shove, this log will save your @ss and punish his.

 

[jimmydean]

Steps:

1. Poop in a bag
2. Set bag on the porch
3. Light bag
4. Ring doorbell
5. Run

 

[Kanye West]

"If it's called tourist season, why aren't you allowed to hunt them?"

 

[4xBoy]

Steps:

1. Poop in a bag
2. Set bag on the porch
3. Light bag
4. Ring doorbell
5. Run

1. Fill album sleeve with poop
2. Slide open end under door
3. Stomp.

 

[EasyE]

I have never had any problems with debt collectors ...as I just wont speak to them. This is what caller ID is for. They EVENTUALLY go away. There is no point talking to them until you have the dough. 2 grand is ridiculous....i just left one hella dirty and with cracked windows and ish, they took 200 bucks out of my deposit....If you dont owe money to the government your all good. It has been my experience that (sometimes) they actually write them off(after selling your account to other scum bags 50 times). I once owed Bofa , it was sent to collections for years.......I just ignored it, finally it stopped. I walked in and opened another account 8 years ago and never heard a word about it.
Only time any "collections" ever came up was when I needed a loan and had no credit card. The lender made me clear some of them up before I could get the loan. The Bofa was not on there report, and I never paid.But if you got a credit card with a high limit your all good

 

[Bushwhacker]

Steps:

1. Poop in a bag
2. Set bag on the porch
3. Light bag
4. Ring doorbell
5. Run
6. ???
7. profit

fixed.

 

[reflux]

drool....

If genuine, this is perhaps the worst financial advice ever given on RM.

If written with tongue-in-cheek, well played sir.

 

[EasyE]

tongue-in-cheek

Why does this phrase give me a woody?

 

[TheTruth]

You just need to scare him with a crazy counter charge. And maybe visit him with a pillow case filled with bars of soap and a ski mask at his house.

 

[dirtvictim]

Just file a complaint with the nevada attorney general and send copies to the jackass and the apt complex.

Worked for me when hyundai tried to not honor thier warranty.
2,500 in repairs later and I was on my way with a sorry sir and not a penny out of pocket.

Not the same situation but worth a try.

 

[DirtMcGirk]

I went down and spoke to a friend at the AG's office this afternoon.

**** this guy, he has no idea what he just started.
You don't threaten military in this state, especially if they're the daughter of "good people."

I'm recording the conversations, telling him I am doing so, and I am keeping a very detailed log and transcript of all the calls. Its on!

 

[TheTruth]

I went down and spoke to a friend at the AG's office this afternoon.

**** this guy, he has no idea what he just started.
You don't threaten military in this state, especially if they're the daughter of "good people."

I'm recording the conversations, telling him I am doing so, and I am keeping a very detailed log and transcript of all the calls. Its on!

you should wear a ski mask when you talk to this guy in person, that will really psych him out.

 

[DirtMcGirk]

Fly down to Tampa with $45 in quarters in my favorite rugby sock...

 

[TheTruth]

Fly down to Tampa with $45 in quarters in my favorite rugby sock...

mwahahaha...

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

You're wasting your time trying to scare a debt collector. Someone with no soul or conscious cannot be remotely effected by any threats you make. Remember this douche nugget has probably accepted his bottom feeder position in life and is more than just a little jaded or calloused to the people he deals with. All you will end up doing is making yourself miserable with frustration trying in vain to win a fight with him.

But this does not mean that you need to stop taking his calls, by all means continue the dialogue. Instead of arguing with this toilet fish, have some fun with him. You're an intelligent, educated smart-ass, put your skills to work.

Surely you can come up with some creative method for dealing with this vermin. Just annoy the hell out of him, but don't let him piss you off, it's what he wants.

Let him go on and on with whatever empty threats he can come up with. Just be incredibly annoying, I know you can do it.

Possible things to say to the prick :

Answer yes or " uh-huh " to everything he says, eventually, after an hour or so, he'll catch on and think you're nuts.

Start telling him a bunch of out there esoteric stories that have no relevance to the conversation. When he interrupts you, politely let him finish, then continue with your story.

You could call him twenty times a day, just to tell him what your farts smell like.

You could call him and leave long rambling messages on his voice mail. Narrating TV shows is a great way to be annoying.

Speak in tongues.

Answer the phone and say " welcome to McDonald's, may I take your order ?"

Log onto this site when you have him on the line, and we can give you some ideas.


There is so much potential for fun with this, just don't let him get to you.

 

[chicodude]

Make him cry. Debt leeches are scum.

 

[TheTruth]

I am really good at annoying people. Call him up and start analyzing and symbolizing things. Talk about government conspiracy and the catholic church's plan to take over the world. And don't forget to ask why all of the time. My cousin did this to me for two weeks and I finally exploded on him.

 

[dante]

You're a lawyer... Send a letter to your appt leasing company on legal letterhead threatening to sue for pain, suffering, and violating the FDCA. Threaten to hold THEM responsible for what the collecting company is doing. Threaten to sue since you did not receive of a list of damages and price for each, and insist on them removing all bad marks from your credit report. $2k is nothing if they have to pay a lawyer $500/hour to see you in court. Letters on legal letterhead are worth their weight in gold when dealing with the peasants.

What's the worst that could happen?? You get disbarred? Who cares, you're not practicing anyway.

 

[Kanye West]

Fly down to Tampa with $45 in quarters in my favorite rugby sock...

You aren't a math guy are you?

Weight of 1 quarter: 5.67g

Weight of 1 penny: 2.5g

$45 worth of 5.67g pennies = 1020.6g = 2.25lb = $4.08 worth of 2.5g pennies

If you want to piss away $40.92 just to have a sock full of quarters instead of pennies, be my guest, but that could buy you beer or gas or some good food or maybe a single-mom-stripper-blowjob in certain parts of Florida.

 

[loco-gringo]

You aren't a math guy are you?

Weight of 1 quarter: 5.67g

Weight of 1 penny: 2.5g

$45 worth of 5.67g pennies = 1020.6g = 2.25lb = $4.08 worth of 2.5g pennies

If you want to piss away $40.92 just to have a sock full of quarters instead of pennies, be my guest, but that could buy you beer or gas or some good food or maybe a single-mom-stripper-blowjob in certain parts of Florida.

Dude...Silent Bob would have looked stupid taking a run at LaFours with a sock full of pennies. (I'd do it, but I through my back out humping your mom last night...Nooge)

 

[greenhood]

You're a lawyer... Send a letter to your appt leasing company on legal letterhead threatening to sue for pain, suffering, and violating the FDCA. Threaten to hold THEM responsible for what the collecting company is doing. Threaten to sue since you did not receive of a list of damages and price for each, and insist on them removing all bad marks from your credit report. $2k is nothing if they have to pay a lawyer $500/hour to see you in court. Letters on legal letterhead are worth their weight in gold when dealing with the peasants.

What's the worst that could happen?? You get disbarred? Who cares, you're not practicing anyway.

Sounds like a semi-decent plan.

 

[stevew]

I left it dirty. But not $2000 worth of dirty.

that depends....how drunk/high were you and for how many weeks had you been drunk/high prior to moving out?

did you take a dump on the floor and play drag ass on the carpet to wipe before you left?

a friend did that at a party when i was in high school....

 

[EasyE]

that depends....how drunk/high were you and for how many weeks had you been drunk/high prior to moving out?

did you take a dump on the floor and play drag ass on the carpet to wipe before you left?

a friend did that at a party when i was in high school....

Living room skid marks....hah, good times...................even though you stole that joke from the movie Alpha Dog..

 

[KavuRider]

I work for a debt collection company.
We do commercial collections, bond and surety stuff actually (construction jobs, contractors, car dealerships, etc).
You see all sorts of stories...

However, none of the collectors here (there are only 3 right now) use any of the methods that the OP said - that guy is harassing you and scum like that are just trying to use fear. Hell, one of our collectors get's thank you cards after everything is resolved! I'm leaving soon though, since work has ground to a halt (no one has any money).

Its funny seeing the FDCA mentioned - it doesn't apply to our collections, since we are doing commercial, not personal debts.

Anyways, that's all. To the OP, good luck! I think you can destroy him.

 

[Serial Midget]

Why not just live up to your obligations and pay your bills?

 

[Prettym1k3]

Beyond all the insanity in this story...

I'm confused by the "...I've got a bar license in Florida..."

You're an attorney?!?!?

 

[Serial Midget]

You're an attorney?!?!?

 

[stevew]

Living room skid marks....hah, good times...................even though you stole that joke from the movie Alpha Dog..

uhhh....unless alpha dog came out in the late 80's.....no....never seen the movie you are talking about.....

 

[Silver]

Beyond all the insanity in this story...

I'm confused by the "...I've got a bar license in Florida..."

You're an attorney?!?!?

And you thought Lionel Hutz was a fictional character...

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

uhhh....unless alpha dog came out in the late 80's.....no....never seen the movie you are talking about.....

It's a Justin Timberlake masterpiece.

 

[BadDNA]

It's a Justin Timberlake masterpiece.

How many Courics?

 

[DirtMcGirk]

Strangely, I am an attorney in four states.
Just let that settle in for a few moments. Its more disturbing the longer you think about it.

I guess the guy didn't get the hint, called the ex again this morning telling her "how dare you tell your husband I threatened you. Now its personal!"

I'm going to **** all over this guy's life.

 

[jdcamb]

Strangely, I am an attorney in four states.
Just let that settle in for a few moments. Its more disturbing the longer you think about it.

Does DeVry have a legal program? Did you get a degree online? Did you finance it then not pay them too?

 

[DirtMcGirk]

Does DeVry have a legal program? Did you get a degree online? Did you finance it then not pay them too?

University of Phoenix bitch!

The apartment was dirty, but not $2k worth of dirty.
Nothing was broken, everything was intact.

It needed a good steam cleaning and to have some trash hauled out.

 

[jdcamb]

University of Phoenix bitch!

The apartment was dirty, but not $2k worth of dirty.
Nothing was broken, everything was intact.

It needed a good steam cleaning and to have some trash hauled out.

I am not a lawyer so I can't confirm this... Can't most state bar associations kick you out for being a retard on the internet? If the building had roaches or vermin and it can be attributed to you. It can easily cost way more then 2K to get rid of them. Fumigation and remdiation is pretty expensive too...