Quantcast

Demographics of American newspapers

Spero

ass rainbow
Jul 12, 2005
2,072
0
Tejas
Gave me a laugh...

1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country

2. The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the country.

3. The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the country and who are very good at crossword puzzles.

4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don’t really understand The New York Times. They do, however, like their statistics shown in pie charts.

5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn’t mind running the country—if they could find the time—and if they didn’t have to leave Southern California to do it.

6. The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the country and did a poor job of it, thank you very much.

7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren’t too sure who’s running the country and don’t really care as long as they can get a seat on the train.

8. The New York Post is read by people who don’t care who is running the country as long as they do something really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.

9. The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another country but need the baseball scores.

10. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren’t sure if there is a country or that anyone is running it; but if so, they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority feminist atheist dwarfs who also happen to be illegal aliens from any other country or galaxy, provided of course, that they are not Republicans.

11. The National Enquirer is read by people trapped in line at the grocery store.

12. The Seattle Times is read by people who have recently caught a fish and need something in which to wrap it.
 

sanjuro

Tube Smuggler
Sep 13, 2004
17,373
0
SF
3. The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the country and who are very good at crossword puzzles.

7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren’t too sure who’s running the country and don’t really care as long as they can get a seat on the train.

8. The New York Post is read by people who don’t care who is running the country as long as they do something really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.

10. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren’t sure if there is a country or that anyone is running it; but if so, they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority feminist atheist dwarfs who also happen to be illegal aliens from any other country or galaxy, provided of course, that they are not Republicans.
You know, I have read these 4 papers extensively, and this is pretty right on target, except that the Daily News has the best comics.
 

stosh

Darth Bailer
Jul 20, 2001
22,248
408
NY
Funny how many papers are out of NY.

I think it's also funny that people read the NY post. I think there is more quality content in The Inquirer.
 

sanjuro

Tube Smuggler
Sep 13, 2004
17,373
0
SF
That's to keep them quiet when they finally get that seat on the train. ;)
The better paper for the subway is the Post. It used to be the cheapest daily and it was less dense, making for a quicker read.
 

$tinkle

Expert on blowing
Feb 12, 2003
14,591
6
the mudville gazette is read by people who think they decide national elections