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freakiest thing that has ever happened to me just happened

CrabJoe StretchPants

Reincarnated Crab Walking Head Spinning Bruce Dick
Nov 30, 2003
11,569
422
Groton, MA
Ok so......I'm sitting at home, alone, in the dark, watching Paranormal Activity 3 in the living room and doing laundry, which is in the basement.

First off, I will be the first to admit I have an irrational fear of the dark.......the type of fear that makes you run up the stairs while looking behind you when you get the laundry. I can't explain why, but it freaks me the F out. It's my house, I know what's there and what's not there (or at least I like to think), but I can't help but feel every monster, possessed soul, boogie man and serial killer is sitting in the corner of my basement, waiting to get me.

So, with that said, I'm 3/4 of the way through the movie, and stuff is starting to get kinda creepy. I hear the buzzer for the dryer go off, and take a deep breathe and get my game face on. I can do this. I do what every sane person would do, and wait for a daytime scene in the movie to pause it. Scene comes, pause it, and head towards the door to the basement. Open the door, and there's a light switch for a single light in the stairway. As I flip it on, I said to myself "imagine what I would do if that bulb decided now was the time to go?" I'd likely **** myself, and I'm not afraid to admit it.

Anyway, go downstairs, grab the laundry, and light is still on. Success. Make it up the stairs, flip the light off and close the door. So far, so good. Last step, make my way down the hall to my bedroom (I live in a ranch). This is a piece of cake, since the hall light and my bedroom light are on. I got this. Confidence is high, and I'm feeling like the fvcking man, thinking I conquered the evil-laden basement. So, I head down the hall, completely confident and nonchalant like. Reach my bed, and lift the laundry basket up to dump the contents onto my bed.

And at that moment, the unimaginable happens............The power in my house goes out. Boom goes the dynamite.

Complete darkness. The eerie sound of electronic devices shutting down followed by a deafening silence. This is it. This is my nightmare. This is how it all ends.

At this point I do the logical thing that any 6' tall, bearded and tattooed manly man would do.........I throw the laundry across the room, yell "WHAT THE FVCK!" at the top of my lungs and nearly **** my pants. I suppose the one advantage of living alone is that noone saw this transpire, but at the moment humiliation was trivial compared to the current obstacle being faced, which was of course survival.

Luckily, this story has a happy ending, as the power came back on 2-3 seconds later, and everything roared back to life. Lights shining, fans buzzing, that weird, high-frequency noise that TVs make when they're on but not tuned into any channel. Never before had that noise been so soothing and comforting.

I did it, I made it through. I survived. Despite everything working against me, I came out on top.

Which is good, because my work clothes are currently drying.
 

Polandspring88

Superman
Mar 31, 2004
3,075
0
Broomfield, CO
It's okay. When I was a small child I used to have nightmares that I'd be walkin up the basement stairs and scorpion from mortal kombat would pop out, yell "get over here!", and then shoot his dart into my back and pull me into the dark musty depths of our basement
 
When I was a kid we had a gas furnace in the basement. Open the door and there was this blue eye down there in the dark. Freaked me out.

Over it now, completely comfortable in the dark - back when I went caving, I could be upside down and twisted in some wormhole and happily turn out my light and take a nap.
 

bizutch

Delicate CUSTOM flower
Dec 11, 2001
15,922
8
Over your shoulder whispering
My wife will freely admit that she would most likely kill our daughters by abandoning her car at 55mph on the interstate just to get out the window from a wolf spider.

When I showed her the pic of this Trap Door spider I found walking across the road, she didn't sleep for two nights:


Heck, two nights ago I awoke to her coming straight across the bed, sitting upright in my crotch screaming "Where is it?" Normally, that would be a dream come true. But she was gonna run from her spider friend, not come ride the white horse.
 

ICEBALL585

Bacontard
Sep 8, 2009
6,240
748
.:585:.
It's probably all the scary crabcore music you've been listening to. Maybe you should lighten things up for a while... try some Yani or Michael Bolton. :rofl:
 

mudgirl

Molester of monkeys
Jun 8, 2007
540
3
Tied up in the basement
I share the same irrational fear of the dark. I credit watching "Poltergiest" at the ripe age of 5yo on HBO. When I was a little girl, the light switch was across the room from my bed. I used to turn if off and then run across my room and take a flying leap onto the bed so that the vampires, werewolves, etc. that resided under the bed couldn't grab me. Of course, once I got the blankets up under my chin, I was golden, as everyone knows that blankets create a magical barrier, impenetrable by scary monsters.

In the last 5 or 6 years, I've been doing xc skiing and biking at night (depending on the season) with a group of people. Something I never thought I would do... go out in the woods voluntaritly at night!!! I still get pretty freaked out by some noises I hear out there and have ended up nearly in the lap of the person closest to me a few times when hearing such noises!!!
 

-BB-

I broke all the rules, but somehow still became mo
Sep 6, 2001
4,257
28
Livin it up in the O.C.
In the last 5 or 6 years, I've been doing xc skiing and biking at night (depending on the season) with a group of people. Something I never thought I would do... go out in the woods voluntaritly at night!!! I still get pretty freaked out by some noises I hear out there and have ended up nearly in the lap of the person closest to me a few times when hearing such noises!!!

LOL... One of my favorite things is to go out and do solo night rides. And on the climbs, there is nothing better than turning off the light and navigating by moonlight. One of my favorite things when I was younger was tromping around the woods on hte east coast at night. Again, sans flashlight.
 

Ruffles

Chimp
Apr 3, 2012
87
0
Selah, Wa
Nope. Took guts to post that. Everyone has their demon stalker in some dimension of their life.
^For sure!!

I for one was laughing my *** off the whole time I read this, not because I'm making fun of you but because I can relate to everything you posted! I share your same fear of the dark, and I do the same things to "protect" myself from whatever could be waiting around the corner! Funny story man, thanks for posting it, totally made my morning :thumb:
 

Raingauge

Monkey
Apr 3, 2008
692
0
Canadia
My wife will freely admit that she would most likely kill our daughters by abandoning her car at 55mph on the interstate just to get out the window from a wolf spider.

When I showed her the pic of this Trap Door spider I found walking across the road, she didn't sleep for two nights:


Heck, two nights ago I awoke to her coming straight across the bed, sitting upright in my crotch screaming "Where is it?" Normally, that would be a dream come true. But she was gonna run from her spider friend, not come ride the white horse.
Insects like this are why I tolerate Canadian winters.
 

TreeSaw

Mama Monkey
Oct 30, 2003
16,668
435
Dancin' over rocks n' roots!
LOL... One of my favorite things is to go out and do solo night rides. And on the climbs, there is nothing better than turning off the light and navigating by moonlight. One of my favorite things when I was younger was tromping around the woods on hte east coast at night. Again, sans flashlight.
I love night rides with the moonlight as my guide. :thumb:
 

bdamschen

Turbo Monkey
Nov 28, 2005
3,316
36
Spreckels, CA
My parents house has a stair case up to the second floor that gaps between each step so you can basically see through to the living room downstairs.

I used to be terrified when I was the last one to turn the lights out downstairs and walk upstairs to bed that something with reach through the darkness as I climbed the stairs and grab my leg.

I keep telling myself that I'm all good with that now (6'4", 200lbs), but there's still no way in hell I will come to a complete stop on my parents stair case at night.