[dh girlie]

ok a lot of y'all know I work in the Public Works Department for a city...I get a lot of kooky calls...this one went like this:

Caller (in a whiny voice, so whiny I thought it was one of the field workers playing a trick on me): Hi my name is Bobby and I'm a resident of 'insert city name' (why these people have to say they are a resident of this fine city when they are calling me is beyond me...I KNOW you are an f'n resident, otherwise you'd be calling ANOTHER city to bitch!)

Me: okay...

Bobby: I have a dead squirrel on my porch and I'm afraid of it.

Me (with MUTE button on my phone): BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

What the hell!!! Get a shovel and a garbage bag, jeez!

 

[gschuette]

And someone said I was trying to live out MY inner blond? That was the most pointless post I have ever read.

 

[Westy]

Should have told him it was most likely rabid and he needs to be quarantined for 3 weeks.

 

[dh girlie]

And someone said I was trying to live out MY inner blond? That was the most pointless post I have ever read.

That's what the lounge is for...I just thought it was funny...and there are some people on here that can add commentary to make it funnier...and did you see any of the Stoney/Pressley threads? Or how Stoney has been harrassed by me and others I've recruited over something he said over a year ago? I never forget...I will stalk all your posts and you just wait!

 

[SuzyCreamcheese]

That's when, in your best deep southern accent, you start telling him some recipes.

The Cheese

 

[dh girlie]

That's when, in your best deep southern accent, you start telling him some recipes.

The Cheese

AHAHAHAHA!

 

[Megan Black]

ok a lot of y'all know I work in the Public Works Department for a city...I get a lot of kooky calls...this one went like this:

Caller (in a whiny voice, so whiny I thought it was one of the field workers playing a trick on me): Hi my name is Bobby and I'm a resident of 'insert city name' (why these people have to say they are a resident of this fine city when they are calling me is beyond me...I KNOW you are an f'n resident, otherwise you'd be calling ANOTHER city to bitch!)

Me: okay...

Bobby: I have a dead squirrel on my porch and I'm afraid of it.

Me (with MUTE button on my phone): BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

What the hell!!! Get a shovel and a garbage bag, jeez!

ahahahha!!!

the best way to handle emergency situations like these is to validate the person. you should say, "I'm glad you called. You should be afraid. That squirrel is probably infected with SARS, try not to breathe deeply until we can get someone out to remove it.."

 

[gschuette]

I don't care if you stalk my thread everybody hates me here anyway. I just didn't think the original thread was funny.

 

[gschuette]

By the way, I posted in your t-shirt thread so feel free to make fun of me there too.

 

[SuzyCreamcheese]

By the way, I posted in your t-shirt thread so feel free to make fun of me there too.

Sure, walk up to that bear and poke her with a stick.

The Cheese

 

[dh girlie]

Sure, walk up to that bear and poke her with a stick.

The Cheese

Shhhhhhh....I think he's a child...I'll be gentle...I'm just now trying to get down to about the 15 year old way of thinking...doing some self hypnosis to go into regression

 

[Echo]

Sure, walk up to that squirrel and poke her with a stick.

The Cheese

 

[dh girlie]

not smart suse, you're asking for it.

no it's not HER...:devil:

 

[gschuette]

I am not a kid just an immature person. If you think some person and their comments on an internet forum is going to get me down you are wrong. I really just don't give a ****.

 

[Craw]

haha, that was funny.

In high school there was this guy that totally had that "Please throw a dead squirrel with its guts hanging out into my jeep after 4th period" attitude.

So I did. It was gross.

 

[dh girlie]

I am not a kid just an immature person. If you think some person and their comments on an internet forum is going to get me down you are wrong. I really just don't give a ****.

Oh...ok...

Damn...I thought I was gonna drive another one to suicide...

 

[BikeGeek]

Damn...I thought I was gonna drive another one to suicide...

STOSH! What have you done to Stosh?!

 

[Westy]

haha, that was funny.

In high school there was this guy that totally had that "Please throw a dead squirrel with its guts hanging out into my jeep after 4th period" attitude.

So I did. It was gross.

In college I worked with this douche that was bragging about driving down to Fla for spring break. My buddy Nate jammed a dead rat into the heater ducts of his '76 Chevy van an hour before he left for his trip. It was -15 outside

 

[dh girlie]

STOSH! What have you done to Stosh?!

Well you know...they call me Hannibal...all I do is whisper to someone until they swallow their own tongue or in this case, break their own fingers...

 

[dh girlie]

In college I worked with this douche that was bragging about driving down to Fla for spring break. My buddy Nate jammed a dead rat into the heater ducts of his '76 Chevy van an hour before he left for his trip. It was -15 outside

HAHAHA...SICK...dead rats reek somethin FIERCE...I know...goddamned city building is full of em...

 

[Westy]

Well you know...they call me Hannibal...all I do is whisper to someone until they swallow their own tongue or in this case, break their own fingers...

Is that why I want to claw my eyes out and banh meh head against the desk everytime I read one of your posts?

 

[dh girlie]

Is that why I want to claw my eyes out and banh meh head against the desk everytime I read one of your posts?

You claw your eyes out? Is it because of this?

(mod edit) I know you think it's cute to keep posting these picures over and over, but it isn't.

 

[SuzyCreamcheese]

Oh...ok...

Damn...I thought I was gonna drive another one to suicide...

Suicide is too easy, like shooting fish in a barrel. The real challenge is to drive them to the point where they lock themselves in a closet and lay in the fetal position sucking their thumb. That's when you are a master of the art.

The Cheese

 

[Westy]

You claw your eyes out? Is it because of this?

That just makes me want to touch myself.

 

[Craw]

In college I worked with this douche that was bragging about driving down to Fla for spring break. My buddy Nate jammed a dead rat into the heater ducts of his '76 Chevy van an hour before he left for his trip. It was -15 outside

Hahaha, that's awesome! Did he say anything about it afterwards?

 

[dh girlie]

Hahaha, that's awesome! Did he say anything about it afterwards?

Yeah you know THAT van wasn't rockin down there at spring break!

 

[Westy]

Hahaha, that's awesome! Did he say anything about it afterwards?

He said he thought something had died in his car. He tried tearing out the dashboard but never found anything. My guess his warm and stinky stay in Fla allowed the flies and maggots to consume the ratty remains. Ol' skippy quit soon after that.

 

[JRB]

Thank you Westy for saving this otherwise really mundane thread.

 

[dh girlie]

Thank you Westy for saving this otherwise really mundane thread.

Oh and you are so entertaining??? How could any thread...regardless how mundane...be ANY worse than a man watching Raising Helen?

 

[JRB]

Oh and you are so entertaining??? How could any thread...regardless how mundane...be ANY worse than a man watching Raising Helen?

That's probably not gonna really bother me until you find out that I cried too. Oh crap,,,,nevermind..... Kate Hudson is hot though.

 

[Rip]

Yeah how is the quest for the Hoodie coming out?

 

[JRB]

Yeah how is the quest for the Hoodie coming out?

I think Pressley may have been offended by our candor and is not really willing to send me one.

 

[Rip]

Ah so Stoney got pissed off then.

 

[evilbob]

Bobby: I have a dead squirrel on my porch and I'm afraid of it.

At least it wasn't a spider (live) :evil:

 

[johnbryanpeters]

Suicide is too easy, like shooting fish in a barrel. The real challenge is to drive them to the point where they lock themselves in a closet and lay in the fetal position sucking their thumb. That's when you are a master of the art.

The Cheese

Screw DHG, this is the person I fear...

 

[JRB]

Ah so Stoney got pissed off then.

Hrmmm -

 

[dh girlie]

At least it wasn't a spider (live) :evil:

Well I suppose Bobby wasn't as bad as the lady that called our parks division feeling sorry for the mosquito larve...

 

[johnbryanpeters]

And there was splat's pregger lady smoking and worrying about the jackhammers...

 

[Rip]

Ahem!?

 

[Lefty]

ok a lot of y'all know I work in the Public Works Department for a city...I get a lot of kooky calls...this one went like this:

Caller (in a whiny voice, so whiny I thought it was one of the field workers playing a trick on me): Hi my name is Bobby and I'm a resident of 'insert city name' (why these people have to say they are a resident of this fine city when they are calling me is beyond me...I KNOW you are an f'n resident, otherwise you'd be calling ANOTHER city to bitch!)

Me: okay...

Bobby: I have a dead squirrel on my porch and I'm afraid of it.

Me (with MUTE button on my phone): BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

What the hell!!! Get a shovel and a garbage bag, jeez!

Bwhahahahahahaa..