guns on trains.....
- Thread starter stevew
- Start date
Under Siege 2!!!!
Seriously though... the wife and I got a private sleeper from Chicago to Portland, we had a couple huge bicycle bags, plus regular luggage. We only checked the bicycles, and were allowed to carry our other luggage into the sleeper car. One could easily carry 50lbs of anything illegal across the country. Nobody checked anything. We carried on board a ton of booze.
Seriously though... the wife and I got a private sleeper from Chicago to Portland, we had a couple huge bicycle bags, plus regular luggage. We only checked the bicycles, and were allowed to carry our other luggage into the sleeper car. One could easily carry 50lbs of anything illegal across the country. Nobody checked anything. We carried on board a ton of booze.
Also a traveler's paradise. I would as soon accept the risk and bag all the screening bullsh1t.
I have a gun! Turn this train around!
not an issue if SLJ is on board
Wait, isnt that you, 2nd from the right?
Seconded. Ferries also rule, in fact rickshaws, tricycles and piggy backs rank higher on my desired ways to travel list than planes.
Last edited:
He said it, I think it...daily
I also highly prize my many fun journeys on escalators.
unless it's in a third world country...then they have the habit of capsizing.
It was as if the gods of airline travel had read this thread and decided to f*ck with me for sh*ts and giggles. We were meant to fly Cathay Pacific, Kansai-Perth, 90 minute connection in Hong Kong, tight but doable easily but you don't want anything to go wrong.........
The first, in hindsight, inkling of trouble was the day before when we had a call from the airline saying "you've had a plane change (T7 to 747 if you must know) and we've put you in middle seats, thxkbai"....."like f*ck" I thundered at the missus and we rung up Cathay and got it sorted.
So that night we catch the ferry to Osaka, have a nice sleep and then catch the shuttle bus to Kansai Airport in the morning. We were arriving at Kansai at 8.20am for a 10.05am flight, tight but with on-line check-in and the famed Japanese efficiency that's no problem. On the bus you get a nice view of the airport from the bridge, saw the Cathay 747 at a hard stand. Second inkling of trouble.........got inside the line at the Cathay counter was out the door, flight had been cancelled! Hooray f*ck you bastards. Die.
Stay in the glacial queue for 90 minutes before the young Indian guy in front of us cracks the sh*ts, has a giant moan and gets taken to the Japan Airlines counter where a flight to Hong Kong is just about leave. 5 minutes later we get taken to the same JAL counter where we are told we can check-in, then almost immediately are told we can't check-in. I go ballistic, they relent start to process us when ground dragon appears and says "too late round-eyes, please eat sh*t". Indian guy in front of us gets to go we don't. Rule 1 when things go wrong at the airport- Piss and moan. Loud, lots and early.
At this point I take 3 valium.
So Cathay staff say wait here while we search for a flight for you. 10 minutes later she comes back with a sh*t-eating grin and says she has found a flight for us, Thai Airlines, leaves at 1.00am (now 11.00am), you'll get to Perth at 4.00pm tomorrow. Unac-f*cking-ceptable I fume. I take the whole bottle of valium. Nothing we can do she meekly protests. She offers to put us up in the airport hotel with meal vouchers and goes off to sort it out. I punch 7 random passers-by.
10 minutes later she comes back and says she has found a better flight, Narita (Tokyo)- Perth direct with Qantas, get you to Perth at 6.00 am tomorrow (only 7 hours later than planned). Acceptable I beam. Btw she gushes, you have to go to Itami airport (Osaka domestic) to fly to Narita. An hour on the bus. Rule 2 when things go wrong at the airport- when they say there is nothing more they can do, they're lying. See Rule 1.
So we get to Itami airport and finally things start to go right, there's a special check-in area for those connecting to international flights and we can finally say goodbye to our bag mountain. From then it's just standard airport, hurry up and wait. Got a nice view of Mt Fuji on the way to Narita.
Finally at 8.30pm that night we boarded the flight to Perth where a finally indignity awaited us. Not only was there no AVOD there were no personal TVs of any description. The horror. The 10 hour flight stretched out before me into infinity. Thank you Ambien, my ever reliable co-pilot, you saved me that night.
The first, in hindsight, inkling of trouble was the day before when we had a call from the airline saying "you've had a plane change (T7 to 747 if you must know) and we've put you in middle seats, thxkbai"....."like f*ck" I thundered at the missus and we rung up Cathay and got it sorted.
So that night we catch the ferry to Osaka, have a nice sleep and then catch the shuttle bus to Kansai Airport in the morning. We were arriving at Kansai at 8.20am for a 10.05am flight, tight but with on-line check-in and the famed Japanese efficiency that's no problem. On the bus you get a nice view of the airport from the bridge, saw the Cathay 747 at a hard stand. Second inkling of trouble.........got inside the line at the Cathay counter was out the door, flight had been cancelled! Hooray f*ck you bastards. Die.
Stay in the glacial queue for 90 minutes before the young Indian guy in front of us cracks the sh*ts, has a giant moan and gets taken to the Japan Airlines counter where a flight to Hong Kong is just about leave. 5 minutes later we get taken to the same JAL counter where we are told we can check-in, then almost immediately are told we can't check-in. I go ballistic, they relent start to process us when ground dragon appears and says "too late round-eyes, please eat sh*t". Indian guy in front of us gets to go we don't. Rule 1 when things go wrong at the airport- Piss and moan. Loud, lots and early.
At this point I take 3 valium.
So Cathay staff say wait here while we search for a flight for you. 10 minutes later she comes back with a sh*t-eating grin and says she has found a flight for us, Thai Airlines, leaves at 1.00am (now 11.00am), you'll get to Perth at 4.00pm tomorrow. Unac-f*cking-ceptable I fume. I take the whole bottle of valium. Nothing we can do she meekly protests. She offers to put us up in the airport hotel with meal vouchers and goes off to sort it out. I punch 7 random passers-by.
10 minutes later she comes back and says she has found a better flight, Narita (Tokyo)- Perth direct with Qantas, get you to Perth at 6.00 am tomorrow (only 7 hours later than planned). Acceptable I beam. Btw she gushes, you have to go to Itami airport (Osaka domestic) to fly to Narita. An hour on the bus. Rule 2 when things go wrong at the airport- when they say there is nothing more they can do, they're lying. See Rule 1.
So we get to Itami airport and finally things start to go right, there's a special check-in area for those connecting to international flights and we can finally say goodbye to our bag mountain. From then it's just standard airport, hurry up and wait. Got a nice view of Mt Fuji on the way to Narita.
Finally at 8.30pm that night we boarded the flight to Perth where a finally indignity awaited us. Not only was there no AVOD there were no personal TVs of any description. The horror. The 10 hour flight stretched out before me into infinity. Thank you Ambien, my ever reliable co-pilot, you saved me that night.
Last edited: