So,I went to the Angelfire Pro Grt last weekend,and after months of upgrade-itis and some more than average riding.(which still ain't alot,compared to most)Getting ready for my 4th Pro race at age 43.Yeah,start thinking of jokes,later. I've been infatuated with the Enve rims since they came out.Anyone that knows me,knows I like a sweet looking bike and love the newest techy stuff.On occasion,since I was a kid ,I get tunnel vision on something I want.And ,sometimes it's a good thing.Makes me work for something,go out and get more business.etc.etc.This wasn't necessarily one of those things. I sold my KX450f this last year after it was determined that it was trying to dismember me .So,I tapped out.I sold to a friend that needed a year to pay me.That was ok,I needed a year to recover. I couldn't fathom giving up 2 sports,one which I loved,the other was fun,but I didn't have the same passion for.So while I was trying to get myself back together and healed,I determined that the the money I got from the MX bike was "free" money and could transfer that amount to bike parts,guilt free.Makes sense to me. I also had built up an Intense Carbine(sweet bike) to aid in my recovery.Got new gear,helmet,tires,shoes...OH..and 2 pair of those sweet-ass enve rims that I'd been frothing about.Got a "good" deal on them.But,they are still stupid expensive.Everyone knows that.I don't care....I have tunnel vision,remember? So,Angelfire.This should be everything that I should love in a course .Fast,rough,big tables,minimal pedaling. So,I poked through the first run,as you usually do,looking at generally where everything goes. Second run,maybe 60%effort,still checking out the huge long course.But this time I was paying attention to the wheels,too.You really can feel how stiff they are laterally and all around.Really noticeable.I liked it.Super precise on where you pointed them and using what felt like alot less body English to get through some sections.Some of that did transfer to the hands too,so I actually stopped twice to soften my fork a click or two.I tend to run a pretty stiff front and higher tire pressures to avoid flatting.Today I was at 33 front and 37 rear.Normally I'm around 30 front 35 rear for races,but never below that. I kinda lost track of the guys I came up with,so I went back to the condo and they were there tending flats and broken spokes and wheel issues....suckers.. You all shoulda spent all your collective tax returns on some of these sweet-ass ENV......what is that?..............WTF is that??........hmm...................................................................that's a 1/2" crack right on the hook bead part of the rim. you know,....the kind of crack that costs $500 to replace under "warranty". That,caused me to go into an introspective tailspin of money,time ,purpose,self reflection and doubt. So,do I chance it and go home with possibly 2g's of warranty costs?Or,should I sit here,catch up on ALOT of sleep,reflect on my situation. I chose the latter.I realized that probably without this very expensive disappointment,I wouldn't have fully figured out that I'm mentally done with DH racing.If i came with a pile of aluminum wheels and dented them all,or broke one enve rim on my race run i dont know if id come to my final conclusion.Id just end up mad for an 80% effort in my run ,or with a broken body part because of the 100% effort. I just don't have that focus and anger at the ground that I used to have.I caught myself thinking about work and running my dog while on the bike at times.Thats why I used to come to races.To come and be pure focus on what's in front of me.I loved that.I didn't have that anymore. DH occupied so much of my mind since I started in 1998 ,that I realized that I was at the point that the thought of racing and daydreaming about getting faster and better really kept me sane throughout the year.I was very motivational to ride ,workout,aspire to something greater. I'm kinda scared about letting go of this because ive really defined myself as this racer in my own head for a long time,but I'm glad I'm listening to my gut and doing what I know is right.Time to find new challenges and experiences.Ive got alot of stuff to make for the house ....and hopefully my wife dosent figure out how much all this DH stuff cost over the years by extroplating how much I get done on the house. I'll keep the trail bike and use the remaining rims on that(I got a spare)..with DH tires...and 40 psi. I don't know how much I'll ride or not yet,but I'll be getting rid of the M9 so that I'm not tempted to convince myself I can make a "comeback" I can't really ride DH for fun,I always will try and go faster and ride the edge of my ability, which I know will decrease as I ride less.Its just a recipe to get hurt.So,I guess I just play it by ear and practice being a better husband,father and human. I'm kinda glad to not have the compulsion to fill this huge void with some other activity.I think that's why I'm OK with it,now.Still scared though. So,thanks?Enve?.....I think?