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If you are on a 10 hour trans-Atlantic flight with children...

H8R

Cranky Pants
Nov 10, 2004
13,967
35
...CONTROL THEM.


Incessant screaming baby. His two year old sister kicking the back of my seat the WHOLE FLIGHT.




:banghead:
 

Stray_cat

Monkey
Nov 13, 2007
460
0
Providence
Get a seat closer to the galley. Then get a steward to fancy you, which should provide and endless sourse of free-cheap wine. It works for trans-pacific at least...
 

H8R

Cranky Pants
Nov 10, 2004
13,967
35
...says the guy with the new baby....that's some bad karma right there. You're ass is going to get bitten...
So I get back to Oakland from the airport to unload gear and my wife picks me up. My son screamed and cried most of the 1 hour drive home. (he's already teething)

It was music to my ears.

:biggrin:
 

Westy

the teste
Nov 22, 2002
39,458
6,146
Sleazattle
So I get back to Oakland from the airport to unload gear and my wife picks me up. My son screamed and cried most of the 1 hour drive home. (he's already teething)

It was music to my ears.

:biggrin:
After that many Neurosis shows pretty much anything would sound like music.
 

gsweet

Monkey
Dec 20, 2001
734
4
Minnesota
klonopin; works wonders with a glass of red. or you could just roll it up in a fruit snack and give it to the aforementioned child/children
 

H8R

Cranky Pants
Nov 10, 2004
13,967
35
After that many Neurosis shows pretty much anything would sound like music.
The camera-phone video showing up on Youtube is hilarious. The little mics on those phone don't work so well in front of a 120db sound system.
 

valve bouncer

Master Dildoist
Feb 11, 2002
7,796
43
Japan
10 hours....baaahhhh, I mock your piddly puddle jumper. Cross a real ocean, poof.
BTW- whoever suggested chemicals for flying is a genius.:thumb::thumb:
 

H8R

Cranky Pants
Nov 10, 2004
13,967
35
10 hours....baaahhhh, I mock your piddly puddle jumper. Cross a real ocean, poof.
BTW- whoever suggested chemicals for flying is a genius.:thumb::thumb:
After I crammed in my earplugs THEN crammed in my earphones it wasn't as bad. The seat kicking had me wanting to fling the kid out the plane though.


I've done the flight back from Japan with screaming kids behind me. It was just dreamy.
 

narlus

Eastcoast Softcore
Staff member
Nov 7, 2001
24,638
26
behind the viewfinder
...CONTROL THEM.


Incessant screaming baby. His two year old sister kicking the back of my seat the WHOLE FLIGHT.




:banghead:
that's nuts. :bonk:

the parents should be put in cargo hold.


our kids have taken plenty of short and long flights and i don't want to brag, but random strangers have repeatedly told us that they are very well-behaved.
 

MMike

A fowl peckerwood.
Sep 5, 2001
18,222
86
just sittin' here drinkin' scotch
The last flight we did with the girls was hell. They'd always been good prior to that one.

They were crazy tired. We had driven three hours to Vancouver from Seattle prior to the flight from Vancouver to Montreal. Neither of them would sleep at any point....and if i recall correctly, Emily was just coming down with a cold and she was acting like her ears were bothering her A LOT.

I have much more empathy now than I once did.
 

valve bouncer

Master Dildoist
Feb 11, 2002
7,796
43
Japan
After I crammed in my earplugs THEN crammed in my earphones it wasn't as bad. The seat kicking had me wanting to fling the kid out the plane though.


I've done the flight back from Japan with screaming kids behind me. It was just dreamy.
Got upgraded to business class on the way back from London last week which is of course the best solution to screaming children. Noise cancelling headphones and a fully reclining seat *almost* made that flight tolerable.
 

H8R

Cranky Pants
Nov 10, 2004
13,967
35
that's nuts. :bonk:

the parents should be put in cargo hold.


our kids have taken plenty of short and long flights and i don't want to brag, but random strangers have repeatedly told us that they are very well-behaved.
This baby was nuts. He was about a year old and would either be eating or screaming or running up and down the aisle or everything all at once. He was huge. He ate a whole mini-pizza.

The dad tried to strap the kid in his own seat for landing. The stewardess had to explain to him for 5 minutes why it wasn't safe (as the baby was squirming out of the seatbelt and onto the floor)

IDIOTS.
 

narlus

Eastcoast Softcore
Staff member
Nov 7, 2001
24,638
26
behind the viewfinder
Got upgraded to business class on the way back from London last week which is of course the best solution to screaming children. Noise cancelling headphones and a fully reclining seat *almost* made that flight tolerable.
when our company relocated us ex-pats, they flew everyone business class.

i wasn't on this flight, but apparently one of the guy's daughters was so bad that at least one person left business class and found a seat in coach.
 

H8R

Cranky Pants
Nov 10, 2004
13,967
35
This *was* '99...

Have they changed?

That would be sad.

:(
First time I flew to Europe was '92. Free booze and smoking allowed in the last 1/3 of the plane.

Non-stop 14 hour drunken smoking party. People had to be lifted into their seats for landing.
 

valve bouncer

Master Dildoist
Feb 11, 2002
7,796
43
Japan
First time I flew to Europe was '92. Free booze and smoking allowed in the last 1/3 of the plane.

Non-stop 14 hour drunken smoking party. People had to be lifted into their seats for landing.
I flew to Harare with QANTAS in '93. Back third for smoking, half full flight on a 747. About halfway across the Indian Ocean one of the pilots came up the back and chatted with our group for about half an hour. One of my friends got to sit up front in the jump seat for landing.
Different world now mate.:plthumbsdown::plthumbsdown:

Fortunately, on the airlines I fly anyway, you can still get tanked for free and audio/video on demand is the greatest thing ever....if it works.
 

valve bouncer

Master Dildoist
Feb 11, 2002
7,796
43
Japan
when our company relocated us ex-pats, they flew everyone business class.

i wasn't on this flight, but apparently one of the guy's daughters was so bad that at least one person left business class and found a seat in coach.
Buggery hell!!!!

I tell ya what too, it's gonna be hard to go back to the farm now that I've seen Paree.*heavy sigh*