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I'm never going to Japan again.

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by H8R, Jul 15, 2008.

  1. H8R

    H8R Cranky Pants

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    EVER.








    http://www.cracked.com/article_15816_5-most-horrifying-bugs-in-world.html
     

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  2. DirtMcGirk

    DirtMcGirk <b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm

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    Where is that faux-ninja guy who sliced everyone up there last month?

    Get him into a fight to the death with these, it would be pay-per-view gold.
     
  3. gonefirefightin

    gonefirefightin free wieners

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    I hear the school girl fraud is pretty rampant over there too


    isnt this valve bouncer?


     
  4. jimmydean

    jimmydean The Official Meat of Ridemonkey

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    As if I needed MORE reason to avoid it. Thanks.
     
  5. BrooklynMachine

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  6. valve bouncer

    valve bouncer Master Dildoist

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    You f*ckers will believe anything about Japan. Those things are a delicacy where I live, tastes like chicken.
     
  7. w00dy

    w00dy In heaven there is no beer

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    that's why we drink it here
    I'd seen that video clip before, but I had no idea they were that big. Guh, I haven't been this creeped out since I learned about camel spiders.
     
  8. Ciaran

    Ciaran Fear my banana

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    Well that answers the question about the "schoolgirl". How do the bugs taste?
     
  9. r464

    r464 Turbo Monkey

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    Send in the Brown Hornet

     
  10. zahgurim

    zahgurim Underwater monkey

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    Those things are in Korea too, but I didn't know it till I picked up a big rock while trail building and almost shat my pants.

    Was a hybernating queen. Fockin huge. The pics don't do it justice...
    And their colour is awesome, like oldschool metallic Marz Z1 orange.

    After puckering my hole and running away squealing like a little girl, I went back after seeing it wasn't chasing me. Poked it with a stick a bit.
    Was moving slow, so I put it in an empty beer bottle.

    That woke it up. And pissed it off.

    I'll never forget the sound it made, with the giant plastic bottle acting as a fart-cannon resonator.

    Didn't know they were so lethal, till I got it home and read up a bit on them.
    Prolly shouldn't have been pokin it with a stick...

    Those things are in the States now, on the east coast. Got into a shipping container, I think. You guys are focked in a few years.
    Maybe they'll mate with the Africanized bees that are there, and give everyone else some entertainment.

    Africanized Giant Japanese Death Hornets!

    Or maybe they'll kill all the killer bees? That would make for an interesting nature show.
     
  11. Ciaran

    Ciaran Fear my banana

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    :p :clue:
     
  12. fortenndu

    fortenndu Turbo Monkey

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    I'm moving.
     
  13. CrabJoe StretchPants

    CrabJoe StretchPants Reincarnated Crab Walking Head Spinning Bruce Dick

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    x2

    I hate all insects, especially ones that can inflict massive pain upon me and kill me.
     
  14. DRB

    DRB unemployed bum

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    Quit deflecting..... is that you or not?
     
  15. JohnE

    JohnE filthy rascist

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    Camel spiders = way overrated...
     
  16. X3pilot

    X3pilot Texans fan - LOL

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    camel toe, on the other hand....


    sorry, just had to throw that in there after the second refernce to camel


    back to the big scary bugs that can kill you and school girl transvestites...
     
  17. H8R

    H8R Cranky Pants

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    Avoid the chicks with camel toe spiders...
     
  18. valve bouncer

    valve bouncer Master Dildoist

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    Give me some credit to know what I'm doing. If you're gonna get dressed up like a Jap schoolgirl you've gotta make yaself at least a little attractive. I think that poor f*cker's heart wasn't really in it.
     
  19. skinny mike

    skinny mike Turbo Monkey

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    i hope by east coast you mean florida...
     
  20. vtjim

    vtjim Beware of Milo & Otis

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    Talk about doing the US a favor...
     
  21. Westy

    Westy the teste

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    Not fat enough. VB's gut plays the part of the left tit of a Voltronesque giant schoolgirl assembly.
     
  22. Da Peach

    Da Peach Outwitted by a rodent

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    There's one of the stranger sentences I've ever read...
     
  23. SkaredShtles

    SkaredShtles I love NEWCASTLE and will ONLY drink NEWCASTLE!!!!

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    Those Japanese must be BAD A$$. Those things will take over here. Everyone will end up living on top of some tall mountain in Montana hoping to escape...
     
  24. Arkayne

    Arkayne I come bearing GIFs

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  25. AngryMetalsmith

    AngryMetalsmith Business is good, thanks for asking

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    Nothing one of these can't fix :

     
  26. MikeD

    MikeD Leader and Demogogue of the Ridemonkey Satinists

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    We must, once again, call on Robert Smith to save the day.



    Why is it that the things in Japan that should be big are very tiny, yet the things that should be tiny are mega-super-mecha-big?
     
  27. SkaredShtles

    SkaredShtles I love NEWCASTLE and will ONLY drink NEWCASTLE!!!!

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    Just be sure to bring a swarm of Japanese honey bees with you! :shocked:

    Although a handful of Asian giant hornets can easily defeat the defenses of many individual honey bees, whose small stings cannot inflict much damage against such a large predator, the Japanese honey bee (Apis cerana japonica) possesses a collective defense against them.

    When a hornet scout locates and approaches a Japanese honey bee hive it will emit specific pheromonal hunting signals. When the honey bees detect these pheromones, a hundred or so will gather near the entrance of the nest and keep it open, apparently to draw the hornet further into the hive or allow it to enter on its own. As the hornet enters the nest, a large mob of about five hundred honey bees surrounds it, completely covering it and preventing it from moving, and begin quickly vibrating their flight muscles. This has the effect of raising the temperature of the honey bee mass to 47 °C (117 °F). The honey bees can just tolerate this temperature, but the hornets cannot survive more than 45 °C (113 °F), and die. Often several bees perish along with the intruder, but the death of the hornet scout prevents it from bringing reinforcements which could wipe out the colony.[8]
     
  28. Westy

    Westy the teste

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    We need a hybrid Africanized Japanese honeybee hornets. Big, pissy, stingy and can cook you while they are at it.
     
  29. MikeD

    MikeD Leader and Demogogue of the Ridemonkey Satinists

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    Wow, so it IS just like a godzirra movie!!
     
  30. JohnE

    JohnE filthy rascist

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    We need one of these...

    Electric Fly Swatter - 1500 Volts

    Electric Fly Swatter will easily kill all flying insects such as mosquitos, flies, and gnats, just by waving at them with the electric fly swatter. And, the Electric Fly Swatter is small enough to take with you, wherever you go. The output power is relatively low, constituting no real hazard to humans or pets. The Electric Fly Swatter has no smell, and contains no poisonous or harmful materials. However, the net will become hot when activated, so please keep away from your skin, and from children. Electric Fly Swatter is safe for indoor or outdoor use. Electric Fly Swatter is praised as the most effective, convenient, and hygienic insect terminator, as it leaves no smudge, smear or mess to clean up after
     
  31. Acadian

    Acadian Born Again Newbie

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    and you think you're safer here in America? I got some news for you...
     
  32. DRB

    DRB unemployed bum

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    Did somebody mention Echo?
     
  33. loco-gringo

    loco-gringo Crusading Clamp Monkey

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    So you guys are actually making Pinkbike music videos now, eh??? :busted:
     
  34. zahgurim

    zahgurim Underwater monkey

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    Think it was the Carolina's that these things were introduced to and spotted in... don't remember now.
    They can definately survive bitter-cold winters, so if they are there you guys are focked.

    You know that Chris King shirt with the quote by a Japanese guy?
    "It rolls good with angry bee sound."
    Was these things he was talking about, not some pinner girly die-after-stinging-you-and-not-even-killing-you honeybees.

    lol... You'll just be riding in the woods, and hear a King hub. Slow down because you think it's a rider on a cool bike, and get your ass killed by evil giant hornets.
     
  35. H8R

    H8R Cranky Pants

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    See? Everyone, everywhere is FVCKED.
     
  36. Lowlight7

    Lowlight7 Monkey

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    You're only going to piss them off...



    Here's the little bugger feasting on a praying mantis...
     
  37. TrailMonkey

    TrailMonkey Chimp

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    Heck with those bees...I'm going to Japan to do some stinging of my own.