Quantcast

Joke...

golgiaparatus

Out of my element
Aug 30, 2002
7,340
41
Deep in the Jungles of Oklahoma
The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep. Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, "Kemo Sabe, look towards sky, what you see?" The Lone Ranger replies, "I see millions of stars." "What that tell you?" asked Tonto. The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, "Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What's it tell you, Tonto?"

Tonto is silent for a moment, and then says, "Kemo Sabe, you dumber than buffalo. Someone has stolen tent."
 

dhtahoe

I LOVE NORBA!!!!
Feb 4, 2002
1,363
0
Flying Low Living Fast
Lone Ranger and Tonto are hunting. Tonto gets off his horse and put his ear to the ground and say"Buffalo Come". Amazed the Lone Ranger says "WOW... can you hear them. Nope replies Tonto...Ear sticky.
 

dexterq20

Turbo Monkey
Mar 6, 2003
3,442
1
NorCal
dhtahoe said:
Lone Ranger and Tonto are hunting. Tonto gets off his horse and put his ear to the ground and say"Buffalo Come". Amazed the Lone Ranger says "WOW... can you hear them. Nope replies Tonto...Ear sticky.
Gross.
 

dhtahoe

I LOVE NORBA!!!!
Feb 4, 2002
1,363
0
Flying Low Living Fast
A woman walks into confessional. She sits down, the door slides up and the preist says "Are you her to confess your sins"? Yes father last week I performed oral sex on my boyfriend in the front seat of his car. The father says "three hail maries". Confused she goes to the alter to say her 3 hail maries, but just before she does she sees one of the alter boys. Thinking her punishment was not severe enough she ask the alter boy " hey waht does the preist USUALLY give for a blow-job. The alter boy shrugs his shoulders and says "five bucks and a Snickers Bar"
 

MtnbikeMike

Turbo Monkey
Mar 6, 2004
2,637
1
The 909
dhtahoe said:
A woman walks into confessional. She sits down, the door slides up and the preist says "Are you her to confess your sins"? Yes father last week I performed oral sex on my boyfriend in the front seat of his car. The father says "three hail maries". Confused she goes to the alter to say her 3 hail maries, but just before she does she sees one of the alter boys. Thinking her punishment was not severe enough she ask the alter boy " hey waht does the preist USUALLY give for a blow-job. The alter boy shrugs his shoulders and says "five bucks and a Snickers Bar"
Even grosser.
 

Inclag

Turbo Monkey
Sep 9, 2001
2,773
457
MA
I'll go there...
























...what's the best part about having sex with a 12 year old girl?



Flipping her on her back and pretending she's a 10 year old boy :devil:
 
T

The Misfit

Guest
A woman wanted to get her husband a pet for his birthday so she went to the local pet shop but everything was too expensive. As she was leaving the clerk showed her a frog that is supposed to give blowjobs and it was only 5 bucks, she thinks its the perfect gag gift. After dinner she gives the amazing frog to her husband and they have a good laugh. In the wee hours of the morning she hears a huge commotion coming from the kitchen, so she goes to check it out. She finds her husband nude in an apron leaning over a cookbook with the frog and asks "what the hell is going on"? Her husband replies "I'm not real sure, but if I can teach this frog to cook your ass is out of here"
 

dhtahoe

I LOVE NORBA!!!!
Feb 4, 2002
1,363
0
Flying Low Living Fast
dexterq20 said:
You are a very bitter man, aren't you?
No just what I THINK the Bible was talking about. Let's see just past my fourth year of survivorship, married a fine ass woman at Sea Otter(that I have pics to prove) Get to work on multi million dollar racing aircraft for fun, get to ride my bike a ton. Yeah I have a lot to be bitter about. If you ever meet me face to face you will get it. I'm a super nice guy just don't piss me off. I have a SUPER DRY wit, and yes I can be a dick, but only when needed or it's funny. The guy I work with was bragging about his "photographic memory" from across the room I announced "it never has film in it". Half the room laughed out loud the other half had that "what a dick" look in their eye.