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Kerry under spotlight as his campaign glows to code orange

N8 v2.0

Not the sharpest tool in the shed
Oct 18, 2002
11,003
149
The Cleft of Venus
Kerry under spotlight as his campaign glows to code orange
smh.com.au | October 1 | Caroline Overington

There is not a woman alive who will not sympathise with the Democrat John Kerry for doing what he did this week.

Who among us has not done the same thing? That is, made a stupid, stupid decision regarding our appearance right before a very important event.

Senator Kerry, who is trying to win the race for the White House, hit the bottle.

The fake tan bottle. Or perhaps the sun bed, nobody is sure. But whatever, the day before the first TV debate with President George Bush, Kerry turned orange.

Not a little bit orange. His face is like a Halloween pumpkin. Or, as the New York Post put it, Kerry - who is from icy Boston - suddenly has a tan "even George Hamilton would envy".


Tan-tastic ... John Kerry this week.
Photo: AP


Everybody has noticed, of course. Talkback callers in the US jumped on the airwaves to have a good chuckle.

The comedian Jay Leno said that Kerry's face was, like a city faced with terrorism, on orange alert. Matt Drudge, who runs the Drudge Report website, wondered whether Kerry had been campaigning too much "in the rust belt".

The tan was so obvious that the Kerry camp - which wants to get back to debating the big issues, like war - was forced to explain it. It said Kerry got the tan by basking in the sun at a football match.

The New York Post did not buy it, and nor did anybody else. Dr Ted Daly of Garden City Dermatology said: "Wow! That is a tan. From a tanning salon." The New York Sun said Kerry's "sudden, orangey-bronze glow" was "highly unlikely" to be the real deal.

So why did he do it?

Probably because he has to face an audience of 70 million people watching the debate and he wanted to look his best. He would not be the first. John F. Kennedy was among the first politicians to use make-up for TV debates and he made Richard Nixon look tired and pale.

It is also possible that Kerry, like many older men, thought a tan would help him get the chicks in. He needs them. Time magazine said he had somehow managed to alienate women voters, who normally back Democrats over Republicans by a wide margin.

Kerry knows the debate will not be about issues, but image. Important topics will be treated superficially. But if he thinks a tan will help him woo women he is probably wrong. Surveys show they are worried about terrorism, and wonder whether he can handle the heat - and not the heat from sun lamps.
 

fluff

Monkey Turbo
Sep 8, 2001
5,673
2
Feeling the lag
N8, I live in hope that one day you will engage in a thoughtful debate such as the Iran nuclear one you started today and then ran away from. However, you still post puerile crap like this instead. Do you really care more about what colour either candidate is than the real issues facing the US today?
 

N8 v2.0

Not the sharpest tool in the shed
Oct 18, 2002
11,003
149
The Cleft of Venus
fluff said:
N8, I live in hope that one day you will engage in a thoughtful debate such as the Iran nuclear one you started today and then ran away from. However, you still post puerile crap like this instead. Do you really care more about what colour either candidate is than the real issues facing the US today?

I think this says a lot about the character of the man who would be President. It's almost a desperate cry of, "I want power at any cost and I'm willing to do anything, say anything to get it..." Why would someone what the presidency that bad?

It is also possible that Kerry, like many older men, thought a tan would help him get the chicks in. He needs them. Time magazine said he had somehow managed to alienate women voters, who normally back Democrats over Republicans by a wide margin.

Kerry knows the debate will not be about issues, but image. Important topics will be treated superficially. But if he thinks a tan will help him woo women he is probably wrong. Surveys show they are worried about terrorism, and wonder whether he can handle the heat - and not the heat from sun lamps.
 

fluff

Monkey Turbo
Sep 8, 2001
5,673
2
Feeling the lag
N8 said:
I think this says a lot about the character of the man who would be President. It's almost a desperate cry of, "I want power at any cost and I'm willing to do anything, say anything to get it..." Why would someone what the presidency that bad?

wonder whether he can handle the heat - and not the heat from sun lamps.
Do you really think Bush wants it any less? And are you forgetting Bush's appearance during the 'who won the election' farce with a plaster on his face - clearly handling the stress so well he was breaking out.

Why would someone want the presidency that bad?

Pick from the following:

A. To line the pockets of himself and his friends
B. To pursue an agenda of revenge on his father's enemy
C. To indulge urges of megalomania
D. To do the right thing for his country

Yeah, scrub D, no one wants to do that do they?

You're denser than the gay penguin when it's eaten the ham sandwich.
 

N8 v2.0

Not the sharpest tool in the shed
Oct 18, 2002
11,003
149
The Cleft of Venus
Slugman said:
Uh... it's F'ing fall not winter. :rolleyes:

Summer has just ended - do people really think that it's icy in Boston during August?

:stosh:

Yep... apparently so.

Does the orange tint get Mass chix tho?

:p
 

ohio

The Fresno Kid
Nov 26, 2001
6,649
26
SF, CA
N8 said:
Yeah..?

Based on.........................................???
*Deep breath*

Studies show that accents are formed almost entirely before adolescence, largely before the age of 5, and are influenced by all sources of language input. During those early years that input is HEAVILY weighted towards parents and relatives, which is why language habits, accents, and linguistic patterns generally carry through about 3 generations among immigrant groups. That isn't to say that people can't consciously change their natural accent, as seen in young suburban white teens adopting their favorite rapper vernacular and rhythm of speaking; however, this has to be a conscious effort.

So basically, our president is like a suburban white kid trying to look 'core and fit in. In Texas.

You show me where he spent any of his formative years even in contact with such an accent, let alone heavily inundated with it, and I'll drop my insinuations.
 

BurlyShirley

Rex Grossman Will Rise Again
Jul 4, 2002
19,180
17
TN
I know plenty of people who moved to TN and now speak like country idiots Ohio. Most of them are from michigan or ohio, coicidentally...
 

ohio

The Fresno Kid
Nov 26, 2001
6,649
26
SF, CA
BurlySurly said:
I know plenty of people who moved to TN and now speak like country idiots Ohio. Most of them are from michigan or ohio, coicidentally...
Do YOU now speak with a TN accent (wait, are you from TN originally? I'm thinking Chicago for some reason...). If not, why not? I feel like it's a sign of a certain weakness of character, or awkward need to fit in, when people quickly adopt accents like that. Think Madonna and her pseudo-British accent.

I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but it's either because you have a weak character or you're faking.
 

BurlyShirley

Rex Grossman Will Rise Again
Jul 4, 2002
19,180
17
TN
ohio said:
Do YOU now speak with a TN accent (wait, are you from TN originally? I'm thinking Chicago for some reason...). If not, why not? I feel like it's a sign of a certain weakness of character, or awkward need to fit in, when people quickly adopt accents like that. Think Madonna and her pseudo-British accent.

I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but it's either because you have a weak character or you're faking.

No, I never picked up the accent and Ive lived in TN for alot of years of my life. I did however make a conscious effort not to pick it up, although sometimes when I go back up north people say they can tell I am from the south, but I think that if i do have an accent, it is very slight because people in the south always say "You sum kinda yankee?"
But yeah, being around my family and getting smacked in the head when I said "Ya'll" didnt really help me pick up the southern thing too much. Bush probably just liked it, became a good ole' boy and picked it up. He's probably not as shallow as madonna, but yeah, i guess it could be a character, need to fit in thing.
 

ohio

The Fresno Kid
Nov 26, 2001
6,649
26
SF, CA
It's funny, I just started reading the articles on the debate, and the pictures show a Bush that is at LEAST as orange as Kerry if not more. Looks like Kerry was able to fade the fake-and-bake enough in the last two days to slip behind Bush in the race for the most ridiculous last-minute TV tan.

edit: attached is the unadultered (by me, at least) image from the headline CNN story. Judge for yourself.