Kids or No Kids?
- Thread starter narlus
- Start date
Again, I just think there is so much to see and do the first 3 years that you loose some of that if there is another in the mix. Not to say kids are screwed, because I have 4 sisters and a brother all about 12 to 18 months apart minus the 6 year gap before me (I was the "oops" baby). They are all well adjusted and we all get along well, but it's also not the norm for big families either.narlus said:
Guess what? Our kids are much closer and you know what - it's perfect.jimmydean said:
<snip>
That's what it is with my kids.
I can relate to that feeling but it's never strong enough to pull the trigger, so to speak. I've always seen myself as the 'rich uncle' so I'm shooting for that. The uncle part is taken care of. My nephew seems to dig bikes so I just need to make sure I swoop in and take him to a bmx track before his dad takes him to a football game or the golf course.amydalayna said:
My neighbor put parenthood rather succinctly: "The good definitely outweighs the bad, but there's extreme amounts of both."
This subject came up in "MudHunnies" a while back. This is one of my favorite videos on the subject:
http://clusterfunction.com/video/ninapaleydotcom/Stork/StorkFinalSorensen.mov
For the more hardcore, anti-child people, there's this site that has some interesting points:
http://vhemt.org/
I think the thread in the MudHunnies pretty much summed it up as being situationally great or sucky and if you wait 'til you're 'ready', you never will be.
I think that a decent financial plan and no debt should be requirements.
I got a chuckle over something Steven Wright said, "The only kind of father I see myself being is a step-father".
It's always been a good comeback to nosey friends and family who think it's their business to ask, "when are you having kids?"
"Invisible Man" has a pretty good comeback as well but it's pretty evil and should only be used in an emergency.
I'm always perplexed by people who think people without children should have them.Qman said:
I personally think that nobody should have kids unless they're 100% committed to the idea. For everyone's sake.
elevendy billion
I wonder if there is any way to setup a poll in which anyone under 20 can't participate.........captainpolution said:
SkaredShtles said:
Agreed. There'd probably be a lot less foster kids waiting for adoption if parents were 100% committed to the idea to begin with.
I've got some friends that can't have kids and they're 'fostering to adopt' their second boy. Apparently the family that gave him up already has 6 kids and he was #7 and they just decided they couldn't do 7.
How effed up is that?
Hogwash. There would just be alot less kids. NTTAWWT.Ciaran said:
My favorite is when people tell me I'm selfish for not wanting children. I have yet to be able to see the reasoning behind this oneSkaredShtles said:
I will admit that I'm also scared to death what the offspring of myself and Freak would be....I shudder to even think what how crazy the little red-headed freaks would be!!! I remember what I was like as a child and I marvel at the fact that my mother had the patience to deal with me at times. I know I don't have that kind of patience, nor do I have any desire to develop it. I am perfectly happy being the cool Aunt who will send the most obnoxious toys and gifts possible, and who will fill them full of candy and soda and then send 'em back home to mom and dad
narlus said:
LOL!!!!
my guess (and this feeling is not endorsed by me; people should have full freedom to lead they lives they want to) is that people say this from a resource perspective. it's been clearly stated in this thread that kids take up personal time, and cost money. ergo, if you don't want to share those resources, then you must be selfish.Velocity Girl said:My favorite is when people tell me I'm selfish for not wanting children. I have yet to be able to see the reasoning behind this one
My neighbor is a foster family with 6 (or more, not sure exact numbers) out of control pre-teen male monsters. All from very messed up families and most with good meth backgrounds.
I agree 100% with SS on the idea of planned families. I mean planned from the standpoint of knowing what your getting into from all angles. Not planned in the sense of "I want a baby, they are so cute" angle.
I agree 100% with SS on the idea of planned families. I mean planned from the standpoint of knowing what your getting into from all angles. Not planned in the sense of "I want a baby, they are so cute" angle.
potential N8 family activities:N8 said:
ok kids, get in the car. we are going:
1) to the martini bar
2) to the rush limbaugh book signing
3) to the 29" fondlefest
4) to go shopping for metrosexual clothing or eyeglasses
5) to the festival of concrete pouring
narlus said:
HAHAHAA.....
......
.... ouch.
Yet another piece of data indicating most people are retarded.Velocity Girl said:My favorite is when people tell me I'm selfish for not wanting children. I have yet to be able to see the reasoning behind this one
That's actually a pretty cool role. My mom just inherited a bunch of money from her aunt (died at 98) who was a dear old lady.<snip> I am perfectly happy being the cool Aunt who will send the most obnoxious toys and gifts possible, and who will fill them full of candy and soda and then send 'em back home to mom and dad
Yeah. Having kids because they're cute is retarded. I mean - look at teenagers. They're a *homely* bunch.jimmydean said:
there is no denying the fact that as a married w/ kids person, i do occasionally envy the personal freedom which having no kids avails. but that said, as SS pointed out, this shouldn't be news to you as a parent, unless you can afford a fulltime nanny.Ciaran said:Misery loves company.
Nice but you forgotnarlus said:
6) Shopping for large pieces of contemporary furniture and new beds
jimmydean said:
Yep. Unfortunately (in WA at least) the more foster kids you take in, the more money the state gives you so many people abuse the system because they're too lazy to work and the kids end up worse off than they were to start with. Pretty sad.
http://www.vhemt.org/whybreed1.pdf
http://www.vhemt.org/whybreed2.pdf
I'm 36 and no kids in sight. I have always felt that I will have kids at some point but so far I haven't felt a strong enough urge to make it happen. My girl feels the same way.
As for it being selfish to not want kids, I think it's true to an extent, but there are some people who recognize they are not responsible enough - maybe not enough. Also, it's funny that no one has mentioned over-population - to some extent it's selfish to bring more kids into the world. If you've ever seen projections it's pretty scary, especially considering longer life spans. The earth is going to be full pretty quick.
(Oh man did that sound like Knuck?
)
As for it being selfish to not want kids, I think it's true to an extent, but there are some people who recognize they are not responsible enough - maybe not enough. Also, it's funny that no one has mentioned over-population - to some extent it's selfish to bring more kids into the world. If you've ever seen projections it's pretty scary, especially considering longer life spans. The earth is going to be full pretty quick.
(Oh man did that sound like Knuck?
)
i want a kid. not now...not for a long while, like when i am stable financially, but i want a kid. name will either be Nikolai or Evelyn. i want to be a dad like manimal.
Mandi, on the other hand, she goes back and forth regarding kids, and that's annoying as hell. if she doesn't want a kid, i really see no future between us, and that's something that will be figured out before i go looking for a ring.
Mandi, on the other hand, she goes back and forth regarding kids, and that's annoying as hell. if she doesn't want a kid, i really see no future between us, and that's something that will be figured out before i go looking for a ring.
No it isn't.OGRipper said:
Disturbingly so..............(Oh man did that sound like Knuck?
SkaredShtles said:I like kids. We have 3, ages 4.5, 3.5, and 11 months. All boys. It's great!
We'd probably have more if the prospect of increased mayhem didn't dissuade us.
N8 said:Jesus H Christ... what do y'all do for fun?
I think that is pretty obvious...and they have the trophies to show for it!!
most of that growth is likely coming from Asia and Africa though; i think the birth rate for developed nations is not that strong (america is a noticeable abberation but still well under the developing countries...the data i recall had europe as neutral or even shrinking). however, an average American uses much more energy/resources as an average, say, Indonesian.OGRipper said:I'm 36 and no kids in sight. I have always felt that I will have kids at some point but so far I haven't felt a strong enough urge to make it happen. My girl feels the same way.
As for it being selfish to not want kids, I think it's true to an extent, but there are some people who recognize they are not responsible enough - maybe not enough. Also, it's funny that no one has mentioned over-population - to some extent it's selfish to bring more kids into the world. If you've ever seen projections it's pretty scary, especially considering longer life spans. The earth is going to be full pretty quick.
(Oh man did that sound like Knuck?
Spending 6 months of the year on the road I don't know how I'd have the time for kids, even a wife or GF at this point. I'm working on the problem now though, I have 3 informal internal job offers that will include less travel. Hoping to have one clinched by the end of the week.
Daddy daddy!!!! You promised we can watch it dry this time!!!!!narlus said:
Ah yes...children. I have a daughter that's 4 1/2 and a son due on Jan. 17th. My daughter was not planned by any stretch of the imagination, but she is by far the best thing that has ever happened to me and I can't imagine my life without her. Hopefully B2 will just double the fun! I'll let you know in a couple months... 
Trophies?riverside73 said:
Sometimes I think they may be more like the consolation prize.........
My wife didn't want kids in the begining. Then she got pregnant....ooopppppppssssssss. It's the best thing thats ever happened to the both of us.
bluebug32 said:
Good call!!!!
We dragged MizN8's poor son all over Alpha Street in Dallas for a day looking at stuff...
However, he did get a day at Six Flags some months earlier but he didn't know there was gonna be a price to pay...
Me, not on purposeH8R said:
not that i know of.H8R said:
So both of you want a baby.........H8R said:My wife and I are on the fence about having another kid. She enjoys being my daughter's step mom, but she wants a baby of her own. I want a baby, but I'm also looking at having no kids around when I'm 40.
Hm.
You want mine?
Yup...I think it's all about the perspective of where the comment is coming from. One could argue that the reasons behind wanting a child are "selfish" also because you don't NEED a child, it's something you WANT. With some folks I don't think they'll ever see the other side of the story.narlus said:
And here's another one that grinds me...."Oh just wait, you'll change your mind" Hearing comments like that makes me that much more set in my resolve not to have them because then my kids would have to grow up and deal with arrogant jacka**es like yourself who assume you know what's best for me and my family!!! LOL!!!