My rules of Mountain Biking


filthy rascist
May 13, 2005
Front Range, dude...
1. All bikes are cool. In varying degrees, but cool nonetheless.
2. Look 3 to 5 seconds ahead of you. Dont stare at obstacles or other distractors. The more you look at the cactus, the more spines you will be picking out of you arse.
3. The tool you need most on the trail will be sitting on your work bench laughing at you when you get home.
4. Vintage stuff belongs on the trail too.
5. Speed is for roadies. Mainly because I am slow.
6. Tomac still rules. Overend finds ways to break the rules.
7. Beer tastes better after a ride. But pretty good before. And during a ride.
8. There is something right about riding straight out of your garage and spinning down 10-20 minutes of asphalt to your own secret spot.
9. Cheap stuff lasts forever. Doesnt work right, and is a pain to adjust, but never breaks. Therefore making it hard to justify replacement to the wife.
10. Nothing beats pedaling in the morning, followed by shinny hockey later in the day.


Turbo Monkey
Aug 21, 2006
In your pants
13. Missing a your weekly ride means that everyone around you will suffer because you didn't get your stress relief.
14. Riding in mud is fun when you expect it, and horrid when you don't.
15. When I'm old, I will forever miss the excitement that comes with going to an epic riding location (one that keeps you from being able to sleep the night before, even if you have a 5 hour drive to get there).


Turbo Monkey
Aug 21, 2006
In your pants
17) Never, under any circumstances, say the words "Just one more run."

My first big ride ever, I said, "Who wants to do just one more before we go." Everyone yelled at me...

...which I believe reversed the polarity of the mistake I made when saying "just one more".


Austin Bike

Turbo Monkey
Jan 26, 2003
Duh, Austin
More people are injured on simple trails than technical trails.
You can't pack too much water.
As long as you are not the slowest rider you are doing fine.
Just get your front tire over it, your rear tire will follow.