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nicknames for co-workers

jonKranked

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Nov 10, 2005
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Ok so I'm pretty sure there's a fair amount of office monkeys here. I know where I work, some of us have secret code/nicknames for other co-workers that are pretty amusing or just otherwise interesting. Post up yours and the reasons for the nickname! mine:

horse buckle - a lady who is a big equestrian rider and has this mondo belt buckle of a horse

the hamburgler - this guy's diet consists entirely of hamburgers and pizza. i'm not kidding.

tyrannosaurus - this guy flails his arms like a t-rex when things don't go his way, which is daily (same person as the hamburgler actually)

dr teeth - you know the muppet? this girl has disproportionately large chompers that remind me of said muppet.

buns - there's this skinny asian kid who wears pants that are way too tight.

mom jeans - one of the older engineers (a guy) wears the same kind of jeans as my mom did when I was a kid.

the brat - this girl complains about how broke she is, but drives a brand new lexus and one day came in with a brand new louis vuitton bag (gotta love LA)

the muppets - this isn't any particular person, but a certain clique of employees in my department that I can't stand. they're the ones that are very cliquey, very gossipy, enjoy their jobs entirely too much - to the point that they don't really do anything else with their lives. its kinda sad actually. I can't stand being around them because they never have anything to talk about except work.
 

Mike B.

Turbo Monkey
Oct 5, 2001
1,522
0
State College, PA
Out of the office environment now but we used to have one known as the cubicle vampire. She didn't do any work, just moved from cube to cube sucking the life out of everyone she encountered.

Think the name came from an old Dilbert.
 

kingbee

Monkey
Mar 29, 2004
902
0
Ohio
Yea, we have "Nickname" hes the guy thats better than everyone at the office so he gives everyone demeaning nicknames.

:busted:
 

tunnelvision

Monkey
Oct 25, 2007
101
0
heffer: real name Heather but she is large.... has a sister named Feather that is equally as large

Scrappy: dont mess with her she is vicious

left testicle: last name sounds similar and he happens a be a dick.

Butter bean: not the boxxer but similar in shape and is known to consume a large pizza in one sitting

John the nazi: Similar style tactics used by the german Nazi's to inforce their rule on everyone.

Uncle Tom: Formerly known As Tom but since I started working here he is reffered to as Uncle tom because he is my uncle and he happens to have a cabin.

Rob rhino: this guy looks like he should be in a coke fueled porno from the eighties.
 

Prettym1k3

Turbo Monkey
Aug 21, 2006
2,867
0
In your pants
I have names for co-workers at my other job.

At the bike shop:

Gabe = Gay-buh.

Raul = Senior.

Stephan = Z. (I'm not too sure how that one happened.)

They call me "Mickey Mouse" or "Bukkake". There's a long story behind the nickname "Bukkake".

Around the law office I work at, they call me "Michael H. Christ." because I go to church, and don't drink.
 

Jeremy R

<b>x</b>
Nov 15, 2001
9,514
586
behind you with a snap pop
I don't have any co-workers ones, but I have nicknames I have given:

RaKell Ankle Swell - this girl named Rachael I knew who had redwoods for ankles.

Todos los dias - this girl we went to school with who wore the same clothes everyday.

Flycatcher - this dude who always stands around with his mouth open.

Superhonkey - this dude in his 20's who rocks a massive combover.
Married to Rakell.

Annie - this chick at my gym who weighs 80 pounds.

Glosshead - my best friend in high school had a greasy forehead.

Slav (from Goonies) - this dude with a busted grill

Big Debbie - this fat lady who eats Little Debbies

Krugger - this guy who always had long fingernails

Pure Luck (the movie)- We used to call one of our best friends in high school this, because he looked just like Martin Short when he got stung by the bee and was all swollen up. He had never seen the movie. One morning I walked into school, and he immediately punched me hard in the arm, and said, I watched Pure Luck over the weekend you sonofabitch.:busted:
 

jonKranked

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Nov 10, 2005
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Yea, we have "Nickname" hes the guy thats better than everyone at the office so he gives everyone demeaning nicknames.

:busted:
The only joy I get from work is standing around telling mean-spirited jokes at other people's expense. Check out that guy. Why is his face all twisted up like that? He looks like he jacks off with Icy Hot. He looks like he just sh*t a gerbil.
 

ire

Turbo Monkey
Aug 6, 2007
6,199
4
In college there were three people we hung out with all named Jamie so we had:
Jamie
Chick Jamie
Fat Jamie

Fat Jamie didn't like his nickname very much, but thats what happens when you pack on 60 pounds in a very short period of time
 

JohnE

filthy rascist
May 13, 2005
12,645
664
Front Range, dude...
Clock Tower-Because I know someday he will end up in tower with a rifle
Eugene- because he looks like a nerd
Coma- Chicks a ditz, and real last name sounds like Coma
Pugsley- Spitting image of Pugsley from the Addams family
 

ultraNoob

Yoshinoya Destroyer
Jan 20, 2007
4,515
1
Hills of Paradise
Got an employee we call Elvis: he has the same hair style, has an elvis belt buckle, sings Elvis songs, and even does the "hey berber" to his wife when she picks him up.

My employees prolly call me an idiot or some other derrogatory term when I leave the room. Why, I don't really know....
 

Spero

ass rainbow
Jul 12, 2005
2,072
0
Tejas
I don't have any co-workers ones, but I have nicknames I have given:

RaKell Ankle Swell - this girl named Rachael I knew who had redwoods for ankles.

Todos los dias - this girl we went to school with who wore the same clothes everyday.

Flycatcher - this dude who always stands around with his mouth open.

Superhonkey - this dude in his 20's who rocks a massive combover.
Married to Rakell.

Annie - this chick at my gym who weighs 80 pounds.

Glosshead - my best friend in high school had a greasy forehead.

Slav (from Goonies) - this dude with a busted grill

Big Debbie - this fat lady who eats Little Debbies

Krugger - this guy who always had long fingernails
Same here - no co-workers, but some from the past include:
Grendel - girl across the hall in our dorms freshman year...self-explanitory
Butt-sex Meg - you don't have to be a rocket scientist
Meg-alodon - A different Meg, but this one simply eats like an elephant
Chipper - a girl that used to hang out with my friends and I that had to be Debbie Downer's twin
Scary Harry - Middle eastern kid in college that HAD to have been a serial killer
 

jonKranked

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Nov 10, 2005
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oh i forgot another one...

HT - this is one of those ugly girls who failed to get the memo, and thinks she's all that. She wears short semi-midriff showing shirts... which unfortunately regularly reveals her happy trail
 

mogulskr

Monkey
Aug 28, 2002
641
0
NH
eye doctor - the guy is constantly taking about how 'I did this' and how 'I fixed that' in reality he has been on the same project for the last 5 years while everyone else actually does the work
 

Spudzie

Monkey
Dec 13, 2001
422
0
Hebron, ohio
hmmmm lets see i work in a factory so there is alot of name calling an alot said to peoples face

The Tooth = a dude i work next too that has 3 teeth in his head an thinks hes a ladys man.

Big Jim = rather lage man that has NO SENCE of Humor

Little Jim= funny as hell at 5' even

the kebler elf= my boss

jay dic= his initals are JD so his nicname chages daily

mushmouth = a chic that no one can understand

materessback= a chic that has either slept with or tried to sleep with every guy in the plant( an no i didnt an wont)

lil bastered= materessbacks latest man

waldo= jus like the books he is there but hard to find

hollywood= one of the bosses that always stand around wearing tinted safteyglass also referd to as hollyweird.

I'm refered to as the prick...lol an i live up to every letter too
 

brungeman

I give a shirt
Jan 17, 2006
5,173
0
da Burgh
TP- (total package) she thinks she is, and has stated it to people... she is not... she lies about everything... and everything she says is a lie!

FFBC left at the end of last year... his name was Bob Carlin, and for those of you that remember my rants about people taking your food and drinks out of the office fridge you may remember him... FF stands for ..... well I am sure you could guess "Fat F'n" BC

Cameltooth: I chuckle every time she speaks at meetings... she works in one of the other buildings so I don't get to see her that much... but everything she says is whacked out and magnified by the huge front teath that have been discolored by years of neglect...
 

Reactor

Turbo Monkey
Apr 5, 2005
3,978
1
Chandler, AZ, USA
WhatYouDo. - the guy who constantly screws up stuff, and then comes to you saying " what you do!?!?"

The shark. - a manager who chews on your ass

Whimpy marine. - the former marine who complains about everything