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Night Rider

Do you buy this story?


  • Total voters
    19

phuch

Chimp
Oct 5, 2005
9
0
cny
So I was riiding last night threw a dark star lit trail. i was using my led head lamp but it really only lights up the shadows, if you know what i mean. so i start heading down the trail to home and something caught my eye. so i hit the brakes looking back over my shoulder and my headlamp flew off smashing against this big ole maple. so i yelled a curse word as a skidded. WHAM i get caught up inthis sappling and it bent my spokes all to hay. just then this cougar jumps out of the woods and lands on me, its claws just missing my neck. so my instincts kicked in and i acted without thinking. i kicked that boy in the you know whats. so it rolls of me and i got on my now deformed bike and rode a wheelie down 600 yards to my house. boy i tell you when i got home i really enjoyed sitting down and playing movies and games at phuch.com. Whould you belive that my girlfriend didnt belive any of this.
 
J

JRB

Guest
I don't know this guy, but I would believe it if it were Stoney.
 

Ciaran

Fear my banana
Apr 5, 2004
9,844
11
So Cal
dh girlie said:
You know...after I actually read the post, I thought perhaps STINKYBOY had snuck back in under a different log in name...
Something tells me that you may be right.
 
J

JRB

Guest
hooples3 said:
I believe it.. every word. the same thing happened to me ;ast week
Yeah - well, a panther got me tonight. I just dry humped him a little and he ran away.
 

Skookum

bikey's is cool
Jul 26, 2002
10,189
0
in a bear cave
This is actually 2 stories ( #13 and #149 ) crudely mixed together from the handbook.

i prefer story #33.

So i was riding along the upper stretch of Gold Creek Canyon. My favoritest stretch of singletrack. There is only one forest road to get to it and that's when my fateful encounter occured.
A huge black bear came out and attacked me. At first i tried to use the bike to separate me, but he was so strong he just swatted it out of the way as if it were a small toy. Using wrestling skills i had learned in high school i managed to escape with minimal scrapes from his claws or bites from the beasts jaws. But i knew i was definately in trouble when i was pinned face down and the beast had his way with me in a most defiling manner.
After reaching satisfaction, the bear soon retreated back into the forest. Humiliated i rode away on my bike, lost.
But after much thought i decided that damn bear would not get the better of me. The very next weekend i went up there with a pistol.
Riding along i encountered the same bear, i couldn't believe it. i reached and pulled the pistol out from the holster as the bear charged again. Not being too fimiliar with guns i unfortunately had the safety engaged. Again i was defiled in the exact same manner.
Filled with rage, the very next week i took a shot gun with me. Determined to blow that bastard away i again rode up there the next weekend, yet again the same thing happened.
Armed with an RPG rocket launcher, i again encountered the bear he was waiting for me in the middle of the forest road. i found myself extremely astonished when he spoke... "You're not really here for the mt. biking are you?"
 

phuch

Chimp
Oct 5, 2005
9
0
cny
Man i love to ride. Howver, that said and never the less you forgot the most important part where i went when i came home. Jane's addiction sang what?
 

kinghami3

Future Turbo Monkey
Jun 1, 2004
2,240
0
Ballard 4 life.
loco said:
Yeah - well, a panther got me tonight. I just dry humped him a little and he ran away.
Kind of like when the pack of ocelots came after me a while back. There were too many to dry hump effectively, so I just passively let them do their dirty work and go on their way. :rolleyes: