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Ciaran

Fear my banana
Apr 5, 2004
9,839
15
So Cal
I replied in the original post but it was long and I am an attention whore so....

As someone who spent 9 days in jail on a CLERICAL ERROR, I cordially invite you to bite me.
Wow, story?
The very short version is:

I got a ticket. Paid the ticket by mailing in my payment as per the instructions on the courtesy notice. The employee that entered my payment in the computer entered the payment but did not remove whatever flag indicates that the case is closed.

Fast forward 3 or 4 years and I am on my way to work on a fine Thursday morning. There had been an issue with my insurance company and I had no coverage when I went to the DMV to renew my registration. So I am on expired but paid for tags. I figured that if a cop pulled me over it would be a fix it ticket. No biggie. Well the cop does pull me over for the tags. He runs my DL and finds a warrant for my arrest. He explains what it's for and after a few minutes I remember the old ticket. I tell him that I paid that ticket. He runs my DL again to make sure he didn't make a mistake but it comes up again. Now I know that since he has run my name and it came up with a warrant he can hardly let me go with a warning. So I calmly submit to being arrested, confident that the issue will be cleared up by days end.

While they are booking me (a humiliating experience in itself) they tell me that there is a no bail hold on me. Not knowing what they was they tell me that usually bad criminals who need to be sent to another location to stand trial get a no bail hold. They ask me what I did and I tell them, "Traffic ticket." They look at me incredulously and say, "Who did you piss off!?" Hmmm... this isn't looking good.

The next day the big bus comes for me to take me to L.A. county jail. (Mens central, the bad place in downtown L.A.) Now I know that many of us think of cops as being assholes and such but let me tell you, jailers (who in L.A. are sheriffs deputies assigned to the jail) make regular cops look like sweethearts compare to them. After about 3 hours of processing and waiting I finally get a cop (not a jailer) to answer a couple of my questions, like what the hell is happening to me? I am told that since I am being held for Orange County they will hold me for 10 days and then release me if in that time OC doesn't come get me. Oh yeah, they don't pick up on Fridays, so have fun in jail over the weekend. :eek:

After a harrowing weekend in jail I get processed into general population on monday evening. I won't go into what it's like in there, but let me tell you that you DO NOT EVER WANT TO GO TO JAIL. Anyhoo, come Tuesday night I am told that OC is here for me. Another 8 hours processing out moving from one little glass room to another and I am on a bus bound for Santa Ana.

Now OC jail isn't as bad as LA but it's still jail, and I am still freaked out. However I learned a trick or two from some of my fellow inmates at LA. I look at the jailer processing me in and ask for a private room (cell). He laughs at me until I use the "magic" words: I fear for my life and my safety. He sighs and processes me to an individual cell. The next few days are uneventful as I wait for my court date. However the only individual cell they had for me was with people who were in for very serious violent crimes. Luckily my only interaction with them is talking as we are let out for exercise individually for one hour a day. The highlight was when one of my fellow inmates came back in absolutely ecstatic after court. They had just won a huge victory: The DA agreed to not pursue the death penalty. So now he was "only" looking at life in prison.

Now keep in mind that this whole time I have been denied access to a lawyer.

So they finally take me to court to see the judge. I am asked to enter a plea of guilty or not guilty. If I plead guilty he'll give me 45 days in jail. I reply to him, "I would like to speak to a lawyer". He says, "Not guilty it is then. Bail set at TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. (The original ticket was for less than 300.00)

My wife bails me out (that's a thousand dollars we'll never see again) and I begin processing out. Now, at any time during this 8 hour process you can be sent back to the beginning for no reason whatsoever. So as you go from room to room and get closer to the end you get nervous and keep your mouth quiet and try to not piss off the jailers. Finally I get to the last room where they give me my clothes back, and I can see the lobby out the window of the very last door. Fortunately I don't cause any trouble and I am processed out. I finally walk out of that last door with the little bullet proof window in it and I am in the lobby of the jail. Free. I have never felt so good in my whole life. I looked at the clock. It's a quarter to 1 am, and the 9th day after my arrest.

We go to court 3 weeks later with a very good lawyer I hired. The judge calls me first and says, "In the matter of the people of Orange County vs. Michael Nunez, the court finds that the original ticket was paid in full and that the warrant should have never been issued. Case closed".

And that was it. No apology, not even a sympathetic look. I eventually tried to sue them but my lawyer for that wasn't as good as my criminal lawyer. I was basically told that we can continue to sue and win but that it will cost alot of money and that OC will likely throw everything they have at us. Justice was available, but I couldn't afford it.

But I learned two things from that ordeal: 1) always make your ticket payment in person at the window and always get a reciept. 2) You don't EVER want to go to jail. If I ever found myself looking at jail time again I would run. The words, "They'll never take me alive" have taken on a new meaning for me.

Epilogue: The cop who arrested me was the best cop I ever met. He didn't fvck around but he was no asshole. He even came by later that night to see how I was doing. The guy was a class act and the kind of cop that makes other cops look good. We need more cops like him. Sadly he was murdered 3 months later during a traffic stop not far form where I was arrested. I still think of him occasionally and sometimes say a prayer for the family he left behind.


Yeah, that's the SHORT version.
 
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sanjuro

Tube Smuggler
Sep 13, 2004
17,373
0
SF
Considering I just got a ticket, my anus is puckering from reading your story.
 

TN

Hey baby, want a hot dog?
Jul 9, 2002
14,301
1,353
Jimtown, CO
man, that made me angry reading that. i would still be really bitter i think.
that is crazy about the cop getting shot.
 

Jimmysal

Monkey
Mar 26, 2010
238
0
Vermont
"I would like to speak to a lawyer". He says, "Not guilty it is then. Bail set at TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. (The original ticket was for less than 300.00)

My wife bails me out (that's a thousand dollars we'll never see again) and we go home.
Pretty sure that you get the bail money back when the court disposes of the case. Typically, it comes back less court fees and court ordered restitution, but since this was the County's fault, you might be able to get that waived.

Or you could find a real scumbag and go for punitive damages. You do seem like an emotional wreck whose life is forever altered by this horrible ordeal. If I was you, I wouldn't be able to sleep at night for fear of being raped.
:thumb:
 

Ciaran

Fear my banana
Apr 5, 2004
9,839
15
So Cal
Thanks guys. Even after all these years (happened in 2002) it still chaps my hide, but it's good to know that I am not off base in being pissed at the system.

On the upside I have never had to do jury duty since then. Each time I am called up they ask if anyone has had a bad experience with the justice system. After I tell my story both lawyers usually ask that I be excused.

Also, it made me realize that even though many lawyers are scum, there are some good honest lawyers out there who really help people. Without a good lawyer I would have likely done 90 days in jail.

Pretty sure that you get the bail money back when the court disposes of the case. Typically, it comes back less court fees and court ordered restitution, but since this was the County's fault, you might be able to get that waived.

Or you could find a real scumbag and go for punitive damages. You do seem like an emotional wreck whose life is forever altered by this horrible ordeal. If I was you, I wouldn't be able to sleep at night for fear of being raped.
:thumb:
Yuo don't get the bail back. (AFAIK) I did try to sue them but couldn't afford it. You would be surprised at the run around we got just trying to figure out WHO to sue. Orange County is a slimy sneaky bastard of a county.
 
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Jimmysal

Monkey
Mar 26, 2010
238
0
Vermont
WOW, amazing story. How the f$ck do you not get your bail money back? That is theft.
Like I said above, I was always under the impression that you got it back less court costs and restitution. I always thought cash bail was a security deposit of sorts. Why the hell would people go into the bail/bonds business if it wasn't?
 

Mr Jones

Turbo Monkey
Nov 12, 2007
1,475
0
Deng dude. That's some effed up stuff. I got pulled over last night. The first thing the femCop says... "do you have any warrants?" I almost replied... I might have some warrant on my iPod. License, registration, proof of insurance, then she had me sit on the curb until another unit showed up. Thankfully it was the duty Sgt. He explained to me that someone matching my description carjacked a silver 4runner.

They asked consent to search my vehicle. I said no, so they called in the K9 unit to sniff me and around my truck. All clear, 45min and a bucket of cold fried chicken later I was on my way home to a pissed off wife and 2 hungry kids.
 

DirtMcGirk

<b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm
Feb 21, 2008
6,379
1
Oz
As much as I hate to say it, yours is not that atypical of a story.

Court clerks are some of the most useless, over paid, over fed, pointless mother ****ers on this planet. If I was able to beat one with a bat for every time I had to get a client out off of a 9 day "no good reason" hold I would have a stack of dead clerks that would rival John Wayne Gacy's collection of dead boys.

Ciran speaks the Bible truth. If you pay your ticket, ALWAYS HAVE A RECEIPT ON YOU UNTIL YOU'RE SURE THE TICKET HAS DROPPED OFF.

Sorry for your time in the pokey hoss. At least someone didn't make you pay the booty tax. Nice work on the "I fear for my life" move. Very Sean Penn of you.
 

kazlx

Patches O'Houlihan
Aug 7, 2006
6,985
1,957
Tustin, CA
Similar thing happened to my brother, but without the jail time. Paid registration on both cars him and his wife had. They bought her a new car and decided to sell her beater for cheap (instead of just junking it). Ends up coming around to the cops showing up at his door that he was being charged with felony fraud because the registration stickers had been swapped (even though he still owned the car with the sticker on it that was supposed to be on the car he sold). Long story short and with the help of a good family friend attorney, he pleads to a misdemeanor rather that have to go to court to defend a felony prosecution. The attorney fees alone had already approached 10K....all for an innocent mistake.
 

Ciaran

Fear my banana
Apr 5, 2004
9,839
15
So Cal
As much as I hate to say it, yours is not that atypical of a story.

Court clerks are some of the most useless, over paid, over fed, pointless mother ****ers on this planet. If I was able to beat one with a bat for every time I had to get a client out off of a 9 day "no good reason" hold I would have a stack of dead clerks that would rival John Wayne Gacy's collection of dead boys.

Ciran speaks the Bible truth. If you pay your ticket, ALWAYS HAVE A RECEIPT ON YOU UNTIL YOU'RE SURE THE TICKET HAS DROPPED OFF.

Sorry for your time in the pokey hoss. At least someone didn't make you pay the booty tax. Nice work on the "I fear for my life" move. Very Sean Penn of you.
My lawyer told me much the same. I was very surprised to find out how often this happens.

I got lucky that I didn't have to pay the booty tax. Not being processed into general pop for 2 and a half days helped. I saw dudes that did have to pay the booty tax though. Scared the hell outta me. I have never seen anything like that in my life. It made me realize that the guards do not run things in jail, the inmates do. I just kept my mouth shut, and sat quietly in a corner hoping that no one noticed me. I'm a short dude with long hair. Had I gone to general pop I would have very much been "in demand". :eek:

One of the saddest things I saw in there was some pre op transexuals. Their lives were not going well.
 

eaterofdog

ass grabber
Sep 8, 2006
8,187
1,427
Central Florida
why not let them?
Because you never, ever give cops information if you can help it. Remember, their job is to put people in jail. The longer you jibber jabber and let them dig through your sh!t, the better your odds are of going to jail or getting charged with something. Maybe a hunting knife slipped between the seats and now you've got a concealed weapons charge.

My coworker spent a night in jail because he said hi to someone's kids while he was drunk. They flipped out (litigious aholes looking for trouble) and the hotel called the cops. He went out to "explain" what happened and they took him to jail. He should have stayed in his room, they need a warrant to get you out.
 

DirtMcGirk

<b>WAY</b> Dumber than N8 (to the power of ten alm
Feb 21, 2008
6,379
1
Oz
"Cops are a lot like vampires" my criminal law professor once said. "If you let them in, they will suck you dry, mess up your life and won't leave til you're dead on the floor."

Unless you have a warrant, I don't let cops in my car, truck, motorcycle, backpack or home. This has garnered me many times of being cuffed to the front of the cruiser while they a) get the dog to come out or b) try to secure a warrant on some trumped up charge. Never had a or b net any results other than me going to IA and community affairs.

Got me three badges now. Looking to get my fourth out of Las Vegas next week for a client of mine.
 

stevew

resident influencer
Sep 21, 2001
40,494
9,525
Because you never, ever give cops information if you can help it. Remember, their job is to put people in jail. The longer you jibber jabber and let them dig through your sh!t, the better your odds are of going to jail or getting charged with something. Maybe a hunting knife slipped between the seats and now you've got a concealed weapons charge.
i've had K9 search/cop searches before.....always the same result....


"have a nice day."
 

jimmydean

The Official Meat of Ridemonkey
Sep 10, 2001
40,937
13,130
Portland, OR
I've had 2 warrants issued on me from an error. One was military (AWOL after my ETS), and one was for a ticket in San Diego. Came up 3 years later in Portland, I still had the copy.

Jail is not an option, I'm too cute.
 

Damo

Short One Marshmallow
Sep 7, 2006
4,603
27
French Alps
:rofl:

I realize this is an angry story, but I just read it out to my crew on the boat and we've all started our day out laughing!

Cheers for the story fella! I'm sorry it happened, but what a story you have now!

Fck it! Your grandkids are going to love it!
 

milohead

Monkey
Dec 9, 2008
754
0
Johnson City, Tn
Let me give you another piece of advice. Asking for a single cell because you fear for your life is one thing if the offense is minor like Ciaran's and don't have much time to do. Don't do it if you think you'll be doing serious time in the end, that sh1t will follow you and make your next months/years worse. The best thing you could have done was take off on the first dude looking at you wrong. You would have gotten respect and been left alone.
The worst thing to do is sit in the corner w/ eyes to the floor THAT makes you a target.
 

loco-gringo

Crusading Clamp Monkey
Sep 27, 2006
8,887
14
Deep in the heart of TEXAS
<snip> The best thing you could have done was take off on the first dude looking at you wrong. You would have gotten respect and been left alone.
The worst thing to do is sit in the corner w/ eyes to the floor THAT makes you a target.
I doubt very seriously that they let Sharon keep his wooden sword and armor on. Not an option for Mike.

:D




*this is a pretty sucky story Mike. I'll yell at someone in your honor today.
 

eaterofdog

ass grabber
Sep 8, 2006
8,187
1,427
Central Florida
Let me give you another piece of advice. Asking for a single cell because you fear for your life is one thing if the offense is minor like Ciaran's and don't have much time to do. Don't do it if you think you'll be doing serious time in the end, that sh1t will follow you and make your next months/years worse. The best thing you could have done was take off on the first dude looking at you wrong. You would have gotten respect and been left alone.
The worst thing to do is sit in the corner w/ eyes to the floor THAT makes you a target.
Can you teach us to make Pruno next?
 

Ciaran

Fear my banana
Apr 5, 2004
9,839
15
So Cal
Let me give you another piece of advice. Asking for a single cell because you fear for your life is one thing if the offense is minor like Ciaran's and don't have much time to do. Don't do it if you think you'll be doing serious time in the end, that sh1t will follow you and make your next months/years worse. The best thing you could have done was take off on the first dude looking at you wrong. You would have gotten respect and been left alone.
The worst thing to do is sit in the corner w/ eyes to the floor THAT makes you a target.
Actually it made me LESS of a target. My point was to become invisible, which I did. There were enough people in the various holding cells I was in that no one bothered me. Don't get me wrong, I know how to defend myself, but you have to pick your battles wisely. Picking a fight with a gang banger or some dude who is still **** faced drunk is not a good choice when you're in a 15X15 room with no where to go should the other inmates take the other guys side and jump in.

Being seperated in a single cell was also a wise move. There are people in there that BELONG in there and you can tell by looking at them. Knowing I was going to be out soon and that it was all a mix up, well I saw no reason to associate with those people and put myself in danger if I could avoid it.

If you're looking at hard time, well your life is fvcked anyway, and a single cell isn't going to save you. There were times when I was by myself with no one to talk to for hours. I can see how a person can go stir crazy from too much solitary confinement.

And to this day I still *hate* baloney.
 

Prettym1k3

Turbo Monkey
Aug 21, 2006
2,864
0
In your pants
You're looking at Los Angeles County. The same county that let a wreckless and dangerous manic-depressive drugged-up and alcoholic with multiple DUI's and drug possessions, Lindsey Lohan, basically serve like 1/10th of her total sentence and walk.

I've worked in the legal field for almost 10 years, and the one thing I've learned? The person with the most money will win. Even if they don't win, they'll drag the case out for so long that you'll go bankrupt trying to defend yourself.

If cops were honest, if lawyers weren't money grubbing jackasses, and if people didn't try to make a quick buck from a frivolous lawsuit, we'd all be in a better place. Oh, and if judges would actually practice the intent of the law, instead of the letter of the law, and not constantly be out for political gain, that would help too.

10 years in this field, and I'm more and more disgusted everyday.
 

Prettym1k3

Turbo Monkey
Aug 21, 2006
2,864
0
In your pants
Court clerks are some of the most useless, over paid, over fed, pointless mother ****ers on this planet. If I was able to beat one with a bat for every time I had to get a client out off of a 9 day "no good reason" hold I would have a stack of dead clerks that would rival John Wayne Gacy's collection of dead boys.
Stanislaus County, Fresno County, Sonoma County, and San Mateo County are full of absolute infants. Most have trouble with English, and most honestly don't do their job... at all. You call for a status update? Sorry. They only answer the phone between 11am and noon. You need a default pushed through? Sorry. It's "under review" with the judge for 60 days.

Los Angeles county is the worst. They have different documents that each sub-division of that county uses. We never know what they want!

Santa Clara County and Shasta County are some of the best to deal with. And Marin County is surprisingly chipper and helpful on the telephone.