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N8 v2.0

Not the sharpest tool in the shed
Oct 18, 2002
11,003
149
The Cleft of Venus



Mom Makes Daughter Stand on Street Corner
Nov 16
SEAN MURPHY
Associated Press Writer


EDMOND, Okla. - Tasha Henderson got tired of her 14-year-old daughter's poor grades, her chronic lateness to class and her talking back to her teachers, so she decided to teach the girl a lesson.

She made Coretha stand at a busy Oklahoma City intersection Nov. 4 with a cardboard sign that read: "I don't do my homework and I act up in school, so my parents are preparing me for my future. Will work for food."

"This may not work. I'm not a professional," said Henderson, a 34- year-old mother of three. "But I felt I owed it to my child to at least try."

In fact, Henderson has seen a turnaround in her daughter's behavior in the past week and a half. But the punishment prompted letters and calls to talk radio from people either praising the woman or blasting her for publicly humiliating her daughter.

"The parents of that girl need more education than she does if they can't see that the worst scenario in this case is to kill their daughter psychologically," Suzanne Ball said in a letter to The Oklahoman.

Marvin Lyle, 52, said in an interview: "I don't see anything wrong with it. I see the other extreme where parents don't care what the kids do, and at least she wants to help her kid."

Coretha has been getting C's and D's as a freshman at Edmond Memorial High in this well-to-do Oklahoma City suburb. Edmond Memorial is considered one of the top high schools in the state in academics.

While Henderson stood next to her daughter at the intersection, a passing motorist called police with a report of psychological abuse, and an Oklahoma City police officer took a report. Mother and daughter were asked to leave after about an hour, and no citation was issued. But the report was forwarded to the state Department of Human Services.

"There wasn't any criminal act involved that the officer could see that would require any criminal investigation," Master Sgt. Charles Phillips said. "DHS may follow up."

DHS spokesman Doug Doe would not comment on whether an investigation was opened, but suggested such a case would probably not be a high priority.

Tasha Henderson said her daughter's attendance has been perfect and her behavior has been better since the incident.

Coretha, a soft-spoken girl, acknowledged the punishment was humiliating but said it got her attention. "I won't talk back," she said quietly, hanging her head.

She already has been forced by her parents to give up basketball and track because of slipping grades, and said she hopes to improve in school so she can play next year.

Donald Wertlieb, a professor of child development at the Eliot-Pearson Department of Child Development at Tufts University, warned that such punishment could do extreme emotional damage. He said rewarding positive behavior is more effective.

"The trick is to catch them being good," he said. "It sounds like this mother has not had a chance to catch her child being good or is so upset over seeing her be bad, that's where the focus is."
 

mikesbikes

Chimp
Nov 10, 2005
17
0
Way to go mom. So many people are overly worried about the self-esteem of our children that it is actually making our children more apathic and irresponsable for their actions.
 

DHS

Friendly Neighborhood Pool Boy
Apr 23, 2002
5,094
0
Sand, CA
sweet i have my own spokesman,

"DHS spokesman Doug Doe would not comment on whether an investigation was opened, but suggested such a case would probably not be a high priority. "
 

jimmydean

The Official Meat of Ridemonkey
Sep 10, 2001
40,941
13,134
Portland, OR
LordOpie said:
next time she's on that street corner, well, I gots $20.
:stupid:

That's where I thought the story would go, boy was I let down. If all she had was a sign about her actions and THAT distroys her, then she had little chance to begin with.
 

pnj

Turbo Monkey till the fat lady sings
Aug 14, 2002
4,696
40
seattle
sweet. hopefully her self esteeme will drop, she'll start using drugs and then get into porn....
 

Ciaran

Fear my banana
Apr 5, 2004
9,839
15
So Cal
mikesbikes said:
Laywers...
Don't forget Dr. Spock and the all knowing ACLU!
I once threatened my dad by telling him that I was going to call child protective services on him. He leaned in real close and said, "Go ahead. I'll beat you where it won't leave any bruises. And then when they leave I will beat you for calling them". I thought to myself, "Where the heck could that be?" :eek: :think: :dead: (True story, by the way).
I never did call CPS, but my grades sure went up.
 

stosh

Darth Bailer
Jul 20, 2001
22,238
393
NY
Good thing it wasn't on the West coast or she'd of been in serious trouble for all the mental abuse she put her daughter thru.
 

H8R

Cranky Pants
Nov 10, 2004
13,959
35
STOP GIVING ME IDEAS.

My kid's grades slipped a bit recently. If she doesn't get back up to 4.0 I may have to resort to this.
 

fiddy_ryder

Turbo Monkey
Jun 17, 2005
1,653
0
Hollywood
H8R said:
STOP GIVING ME IDEAS.

My kid's grades slipped a bit recently. If she doesn't get back up to 4.0 I may have to resort to this.

bwhahahahahahh...

whatever happened to a good old fashioned ass whoopin :nopity:
 

Secret Squirrel

There is no Justice!
Dec 21, 2004
8,150
1
Up sh*t creek, without a paddle
So to summarize....

1.) No beatin's cause CPS or someone will put you in jail...
2.) No humiliation cause that does emotional damage...
3.) Catch them doing something good and reinforce that...
4.) Even if it's putting the needle in their arm the right way...

I say way to go Mom!! Now that's being creative and making a statement all at the same time. If you want to be apathetic and irresponsible for all of your actions, there's probably a state penitentiary nearby where you can learn those attributes the hard way...and that's legal and everyone will turn a blind eye to it...
 

Velocity Girl

whack-a-mole
Sep 12, 2001
1,279
0
Atlanta
Way to go Mom!!! There are consequences for you actions and the majority of the time they're not pretty. Better to learn the lesson now before you get your a** fired from a job because you didn't listen to your boss.

Why do people think that every little thing done to a child will cause this traumatic damange that they can never recover from? Do we truly want our children to grow up living such sheltered lives that if they see red marker on their paper they will break out in hives?? If that's the worse public humiliation that girl ever experiences she's getting off lucky!!!!
 

H8R

Cranky Pants
Nov 10, 2004
13,959
35
fiddy_ryder said:
whatever happened to a good old fashioned ass whoopin :nopity:
That will pretty much teach my kid the fact that a 220 lb male can beat her up, and not much else.

Embarassment is a MUCH more effective parenting tool. Teens are easily mortified by their parents. All I have to do is threaten to go to school with her and do a little dance for her class. That straightens her out pretty quick.
 

.:Jeenyus:.

Turbo Monkey
Feb 23, 2004
2,831
1
slc
H8R said:
STOP GIVING ME IDEAS.

My kid's grades slipped a bit recently. If she doesn't get back up to 4.0 I may have to resort to this.
My parents are like that. Not the whole embarrising thing, but the expecting a 4.0. I never should have started getting 4.0's in the first place. :mumble:
 

MudGrrl

AAAAH! Monkeys stole my math!
Mar 4, 2004
3,123
0
Boston....outside of it....
"She already has been forced by her parents to give up basketball and track because of slipping grades, and said she hopes to improve in school so she can play next year."


Her grades were slipping, and the school didn't care?
Isn't there some kind of average you have to maintain to stay in sports?
 

LordOpie

MOTHER HEN
Oct 17, 2002
21,022
3
Denver
If these parents are brought up on charges, I say we all go protest until they're left alone.

PS: Amen to h8r about whooping.
 

LordOpie

MOTHER HEN
Oct 17, 2002
21,022
3
Denver
Cooter Brown said:
It's right down the road from me, I'd be down for a protest Loopie
does that mean we can camp in your backyard and use your bathroom?

I could be a hippie except for the no showering thing ;)
 

SilentJ

trail builder
Jun 17, 2002
1,312
0
Calgary AB
robdamanii said:
I ask the same.

I think I'll take the belt to my kids when I have them.
:stupid:

My dad used to beat the FK outta me...he did that until one day I did the same to him then it stopped. I turned out okay and we still drink beer together. While I think he took it too far with me, I dont think a spanking here and there is going to cause a kid to go all charles manson on the world.
 

Cooter Brown

Turbo Monkey
May 30, 2002
1,453
0
Snow Hall, tweakin on math
yeah, my parents tanned my ass up until the time my mom got after me one day and I turned around and laughed at her. She then laughed, and that was the start of grounding. Had I only known, I would have never turned and laughed, but just kept taking my ass whippings.
 

reflux

Turbo Monkey
Mar 18, 2002
4,617
2
G14 Classified
H8R said:
That will pretty much teach my kid the fact that a 220 lb male can beat her up, and not much else.

Embarassment is a MUCH more effective parenting tool. Teens are easily mortified by their parents. All I have to do is threaten to go to school with her and do a little dance for her class. That straightens her out pretty quick.
:stupid:

I pray to God that I'll never have to take a hand to my child.

**Edit: I've dated my share of girls who had major issues with their fathers due to the "whippings." I wouldn't want to do the same to my (future) daughter or children.**
 

reflux

Turbo Monkey
Mar 18, 2002
4,617
2
G14 Classified
Velocity Girl said:
Way to go Mom!!! There are consequences for you actions and the majority of the time they're not pretty. Better to learn the lesson now before you get your a** fired from a job because you didn't listen to your boss.

Why do people think that every little thing done to a child will cause this traumatic damange that they can never recover from? Do we truly want our children to grow up living such sheltered lives that if they see red marker on their paper they will break out in hives?? If that's the worse public humiliation that girl ever experiences she's getting off lucky!!!!
Self-esteem.

The concept behind, or at least, the current method of teaching self-esteem, is fundamentally flawed. Back in elementary school, we were taught in self-esteem class that we should feel good about ourselves. When asked why we should feel so good, the answer time-and-time again was "because." The class made no mention about our actions and how they could affect our emotions, and vice versa. The concepts of depression, bad days, punishments for bad actions, good days, etc were off-limits. Self-esteem class is f'n up our society.

Imo, learned optimism is the way to go.
 

Ciaran

Fear my banana
Apr 5, 2004
9,839
15
So Cal
reflux said:
Self-esteem.

The concept behind, or at least, the current method of teaching self-esteem, is fundamentally flawed. Back in elementary school, we were taught in self-esteem class that we should feel good about ourselves. When asked why we should feel so good, the answer time-and-time again was "because." The class made no mention about our actions and how they could affect our emotions, and vice versa. The concepts of depression, bad days, punishments for bad actions, good days, etc were off-limits. Self-esteem class is f'n up our society.

Imo, learned optimism is the way to go.
You had self esteem classes? Are you kidding me?
 

reflux

Turbo Monkey
Mar 18, 2002
4,617
2
G14 Classified
Ciaran said:
You had self esteem classes? Are you kidding me?
Dead serious, no f'n joke. Granted they were only one day classes a couple time a year. I think we did it for a few years in the middle of grade school.
 

SkaredShtles

Michael Bolton
Sep 21, 2003
65,376
12,532
In a van.... down by the river
Ciaran said:
I once threatened my dad by telling him that I was going to call child protective services on him. He leaned in real close and said, "Go ahead. I'll beat you where it won't leave any bruises. And then when they leave I will beat you for calling them". I thought to myself, "Where the heck could that be?" :eek: :think: :dead: (True story, by the way).
I never did call CPS, but my grades sure went up.
Please, please, please talk your wife out of kids. ;)
 

PatBranch

Turbo Monkey
Sep 24, 2004
10,451
9
wine country
My friend was going to call child services and his dad handed him the phone and the number. I tjink he ended up not calling.....haha
 

LordOpie

MOTHER HEN
Oct 17, 2002
21,022
3
Denver
N8 said:
brilliant!

It's funny how people think that only the girl could be embarrassed. Mom put herself out there too and told the world that she's not a perfect mom (no one is, but who admits it?).