[Da Peach]

This guy at my office is really starting to grind my gears.

First, he's a big fat separatist. This, I find annoying from the get go.

Second, he smugly protested when the company started issuing bonuses to those completing work on tightened deadlines. WTF? (oh yeah, then accepted them anyway. Take the cash and shut your hole!)

Third, perpetual complaining about how the company is run by idiots, things should be done in way x instead of way y...blah blah blather blah... If he hates it here so much, I wish he would just do us all a favour and quit already...

Fourth, he constantly comes to visit me with little anecdotes. Today's edition, his ski season will have to start late this year because he couldn't go this weekend. Killington didn't open. Oh no! Why does he think I give a rat's ass? It will have to go to next weekend. It's october. But of course, only if he manages to get his skis back from the tuner. It might not happen because his tuner is the best tuner in montreal and he tunes all (no, not all, just the best) ski teams' skis so it can sometimes take a while. Oh yeah, and the good deal on steepandcheap that I showed him when he mentioned that he needed new skis was an insult because K2s are made in the US, and buying anything American is bad, which is also why he won't by Rossignol skis anymore because they were apparently bought by O'Brien...

Fack, leave me be!

Rant over. I have others, but I'll save those for later.

 

[Westy]

My office mate argues on the phone with his wife every day. As soon as he hangs up the phone he runs over to my side and gives me a play by play recount of it. I've flat out told him I need to hear his marital disputes like I need bloody diarrhea, it hasn't slowed him down one bit.

What kind of people do y'all have as coworkers. Everyone I work with is in their mid to late 50's. I've been the youngest person here for the last 7 years.

 

[llkoolkeg]

Have you tried calmly and quietly taking him aside and delivering a roundhouse cockpunch?

 

[loco-gringo]

Ask him to cup his hands and then pee in them.

 

[Da Peach]

Have you tried calmly and quietly taking him aside and delivering a roundhouse cockpunch?

Not quite yet. I've taken to the saracastic trolling for his stupid opinions with a smarmy grin, then waiting for him to leave. Yep, I'm a bit of a jerk, but I can handle that. Perhaps I'll leave a bag of feces in his car. Which is a Suzuki, because that's all he needs and anything more is such a waste and it doesn't make any sense and is better in the snow than some 4WDs and he knows a guy who sells snow tires that are better than the ones that i bought because...blah blah etc etc...

Cockpunch you say?

 

[Da Peach]

I'm 31, this guy's a couple years younger, buy he's years ahead of his time in terms of pretentiousness.

 

[LordOpie]

If he hates it here so much, I wish he would just do us all a favour and quit already.

that's what I don't understand... why do people stay if it sucks so much?

 

[dogwonder]

Blow your nose and then pat him on the back.

 

[BurlyShirley]

that's what I don't understand... why do people stay if it sucks so much?

Work sucks in general. People dont want to be there.

 

[DRB]

Ask him if he knows what an angry pirate is?

 

[loco-gringo]

Ask him if he knows what an angry pirate is?

Just show him, and then confirm that he knows what just happened.

 

[TreeSaw]

My office mate argues on the phone with his wife every day. As soon as he hangs up the phone he runs over to my side and gives me a play by play recount of it. I've flat out told him I need to hear his marital disputes like I need bloody diarrhea, it hasn't slowed him down one bit.

What kind of people do y'all have as coworkers. Everyone I work with is in their mid to late 50's. I've been the youngest person here for the last 7 years.

Depends on the school. I am usually one of the youngest, but luckily most of the others don't bother me with their problems. There is one woman at my Tuesday school that always feels the need to tell me how her life is so horrible. I generally just tune her out. I also (same school) have to deal with the custodian interrupting my classes to tell me about how good he plays the baritone and how I am not teaching the right music to the kids. I actually told him that I am a trained professional that actually reads music and that I would appreciate him not stopping by to critique my job....he still comes in and I just ignore him now and when he interrupts I correct him in front of the students (who think he's creepy).

 

[DRB]

Just show him, and then confirm that he knows what just happened.

Alternatively you could show him a picture of MMike having relations with a horse..... I'm figuring that might make him go away.

 

[Da Peach]

Alternatively you could show him a picture of MMike having relations with a horse..... I'm figuring that might make him go away.

But part of the 'rear' will be chopped off in the photo....

 

[johnbryanpeters]

So you work with MMike?

 

[McGRP01]

I work alone. I sit at a computer in a basement office with no window and fluorescent lighting for 8 hours a day with the only sound being the hum of the sever racks. What I would give to have to listen to somebody else complain sometimes.

 

[LordOpie]

I work alone. I sit at a computer in a basement office with no window and fluorescent lighting for 8 hours a day with the only sound being the hum of the sever racks. What I would give to have to listen to somebody else complain sometimes.

Enjoy the peace man. You really don't wan tthat kind of poison in your office.

 

[MMike]

I hate everyone at work. They are all a-stupid. I am smart.

 

[Jeremy R]

Next time he talks to you about skiing just stand up in your chair and scream "Sonny Bono" over and over until he walks away.

 

[robdamanii]

Pee in his coffee cup while he's holding it.

 

[Zark]

I work alone. I sit at a computer in a basement office with no window and fluorescent lighting for 8 hours a day with the only sound being the hum of the sever racks. What I would give to have to listen to somebody else complain sometimes.

Milton, do you still want your stapler? Red swingline right?:biggrin:

 

[Nick]

next time he starts up, tell him that life is way too short for all that negativity, his constant whining brings everyone else down, and unless he has something positive to say consider you not interested.

It's like my Grandma used to say "if you can't say something nice ... shut the f*ck up, jackass."

 

[TreeSaw]

Milton, do you still want your stapler? Red swingline right?:biggrin:

LOL!!!! I was thinking the same thing!

 

[Kihaji]

I work at a place where 90% of everyones day is talking about stupid crap that isn't work. To keep my sanity I figured I had 3 options:

1) Anytime anyone starts to approach you, twitch violently and mumble "Snakes, Snakes, Snakes, oh my god they are all over me, Snakes"

2) I call option 2 the Billy Madison defense against stupidity. Anytime someone starts to engage you in a stupid conversation, speak in jibberish and run off after an imaginary giant penguin.

3) 2 words, head phones. They are a subconscious "Leave me the **** alone" sign.

 

[Da Peach]

Then there's this other guy...a draftsman that I unfortunately share an office with.

No matter what it is that's going on, he absolutely MUST participate and lend his obscure, irrelevant 2 cents to the discussion and then proceed to add another nickel.

The other day one of the VPs was doing a technical check of my work. He had a suggestion on how to change to wording to make it easier to understand for the everyman:

"Chris, I wanted to check this figure with you for the number of design changes"

Me: "Hmm, true, that number looks about right, but let my verify..."

Idiot: "That seems low...I seem to remember that there was quite a few others in (category x) and that the..."

Me: "Here we go, yep, the number is right. Each revison is considered it's own change"

In my mind, this was settled and I could go back to work. Then the idiot gets up out of his chair and comes over to verify my information. This distracts the VP and starts into a discussion on something that has already been checked by 4 people...

Not only a waste of time, but insulting to me.

This guy also insists on using obscure computer programs which he INSISTS are far superior to Microsoft's. One time on the jobsite, I needed to print a photo to go "sell" a design change to the client. My camera, or window photo manager or whatever its's call was giving me trouble. That never happens so I started cursing it (I can get a little vocal sometimes...) Not a problem, I figured a quick reboot and all would work out, just regular computer annoyance...

Idiot comes over and picks up my camera while I was looking something up and starts to examine it like it was some sort of arrowhead he picked up whille bothering an antropologist in an archeological dig.

"Having a problem?" he asks...

"Yeah yeah..this friggin computer is such a POS!"

"Are you using window photo manager?"

"Yeah, it'll take me a few seconds here..."

"Oh well, you should be using Total Commander. It's far superior for managing your files and changing..'

"Yeah, thanks, but I'm not really going to start fooling with..."

He takes my camera over to his computer and plugs it in. I bite my lip and give him the benefit of the doubt...

Idiot: "Hmm, that's strange...it seems that the file format...'

Me: "Ah, well my computer is up again"

Idiot: "Just a moment, this is quite unusual..."

Me: "Well, I'll come back if it doesn't work on mine."

Idiot: "But I just want to check...'

Me: "Thanks, but I can take it from here" I take my camera back...

All the while my walkie talkie is blaring random conversations going back and forth onthe worksite...

Idiot: "Canon seems to have had many problems with the software within their products which can have incompatibilities..."

So frustrating! Leave me alone! This is my personal camera! I'll figure it out! Stop touching my stuff! Go back to work! We need that drawing tomorrow! Get it done and stop arsing around with my ****!

And the worst part is that he's got this stupid France french accent! He's from Laval! (Quebec) It's not just what he says, but how he says it, how much he says, and the way it sounds when it comes out of his little rodently-coy face!

Not even the HR lady can stand him!

Enough. Back to work.

 

[MMike]

I hate people from Laval

 

[Mizzle]

Would you like a wamburger and some cry fries ?

How about a Weinekin.

Some cheese to go with all that wine?

Man the **** up, and handle the situation.
If you donlt like someone, in no uncertain terms let it be known.

Put the asshat in their place.

Listen, everyone works with people they don't like. If your simply there for the job, handle your ****.

If there for the future, and promotion etc.....You'll need manage the situation more carefully.

Maybe you need some Zanax or something to tolerate the clowns.

Anyways this wasn't meant as insult but if you want it to stop handle it soon, and be succinct in your words.

Quit being a bitch.

And drink some beer

John

 

[Da Peach]

Man the **** up, and handle the situation.
If you donlt like someone, in no uncertain terms let it be known.

Put the asshat in their place.

Okay Cha-chi. I don't like you. Thanks for the advice. Now **** off.

 

[Mizzle]

Easy right,

Now try it with the people you hate so much you had to start a thread about them.

Don't shoot the messenger.
You asked for advice, or whatever. And you got it.

Don't be an internet tough guy.

Cheers
John

 

[jimmydean]

People at work tend to suck. I try to keep to myself and hope the day passes without too much crap hiting me as it flys overhead.

 

[bluebug32]

I used to sit in the cubicle next to a woman who had a fat, lazy child. Every day at 2:35 on the nose, this kid would call after the bus dropped her off. What always ensued was yelling from my co-worker to the tune of putting down the bag of chips/cookies/candy her daughter was eating and taking the dog for "a damn walk." The call always ended with one of them slamming down the phone and hanging up on the other.

 

[MMike]

His first internet fight. I'm so proud....

 

[Mani_UT]

And the worst part is that he's got this stupid France french accent! He's from Laval! (Quebec) .

Lol. What's wrong with that?

Et Vive le Quebec Libre!

 

[CKxx]

Dude...you must read this short story. It's called 'Moonface' by Jack London. Your rant about his accent made me think of this.

http://london.sonoma.edu/Writings/MoonFace/moonface.html

P.S.: Its got a badass ending.

 

[dan-o]

And the worst part is that he's got this stupid France french accent! He's from Laval! (Quebec) It's not just what he says, but how he says it, how much he says, and the way it sounds when it comes out of his little rodently-coy face!

Tell the boss he's french-pakistani and declare ITAR on his ass. Then professional escort MMike can take him off your hands. problem solved.

 

[MMike]

Tell the boss he's french-pakistani and declare ITAR on his ass. Then professional escort MMike can take him off your hands. problem solved.

Excellent thread linking....

 

[Da Peach]

Funny how people who imagine they're being asked for serious advice are the first to give it....

Reminds me of an office mate of mine....