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Pointless Post Alert!

mcA896

Turbo Monkey
Aug 15, 2003
1,160
0
Cape Cod, MA
so today, iw as at work and some tiny lady (read: cant hardly see over steering wheel) driving this HUUGe ford excursion pulls in the bike shop loy. she starts to go FOREWARD, not BACKWARD and knocks down our small fence. going foreward. its a clearly visible fence ~5 ft. high. then she speeds away. later, this gay-sounding guy (we'll say meterosexual for now :p ) comes in and the roadie of the shop helps him out. the roadie goes:
r:hey u from texas?
metrosexual:sure am.
r:well i KNOW the only damn things comin outta texas right about now are steers and queers and u dont look like you got no longhorns.
metrosexual says nothing.

we were all alughin our A$$ES off in the back. it was funny :p :cool:

anyone else have funny bikeshop stories?
 

arctcknight

Chimp
Jul 6, 2004
17
0
Scottsdale Az
okay so im sitting at my bench just doing a tune up on a kmart bike as usuall, and we are realatively busy mostly just our usualls one of which is a scottsdale cop. when this lady comes in screaming and crying cause she locked her baby in her car ( now think this is summer time in arizona its 110 out) when she gets to our counter she looks up and sees a cop there and just stops crying and walks out. the cop being smart calls the fire dept. and they send a truck to come slim jim her door the whole time she is outside thinking now she is going to get arrested being that it is illeagle here to leave your kid in the car. so they come slim jim her door and leave, the cop goes out and talks to her given he is a very laid back guy and she tells him that the kid was playing with the keys when she put her in the car. so just as she shuts the door to get in, the kid hits the button to lock the door. so hes like okay it was an accident whatever ill let it go at which point she starts crying again and gives him a hug and gets in the car and takes off. okay after typing this it doesnt sound as funny as it should but it was one of those thing you would have had to be there to see how funny it really was.
 

Nate at RIT

Monkey
Oct 8, 2003
278
0
bending stuff in the ROC
Not so much a bikeshop story, but funny and involving bikes nevertheless. So about 2 years ago, I had a CaneCreek AD-10, and I was going to take it apart, do some maintenance, and relube it. Being my first time taking it apart, I didn't think it through totally. So I notice it's really hard to unthread the main collar, so I put it into a vice (this is the time when I should've noticed something was wrong). Keep turning it, keep turning it, KA-BOOM!. Yeah, so an air shock pressurized to about 190 will take right off in a garage. Quite amusing, and it left me with a good lesson.
 

Zark

Hey little girl, do you want some candy?
Oct 18, 2001
6,254
7
Reno 911
I worked at a student run bike shop at UCSB while at school and had a number of amusing incidents. One of the unusual things about this shop is I'd teach people how to work on their own bikes. Sounds fun right? Try explaining a BB overhaul on a cruiser to a guy who'se only been in the US for a week....

Anyway we had an air compressor with a 15 gallon capacity pressured to 100 psi to get road bikes close to pressure. Well most people don't need that and it was downright dangerous to idiots. About every hour someone would pump air into the cruiser tire and KABOOOM! The shop joke was to yell "Four bucks!" every time this happened (price of a tube). One Friday afternoon I decided to mix it up and yelled "I've been shot!" really loud. Well someone took me seriously... cops, ambulance, the whole nine yards, insane. The guy who blew up the tube knew I was joking as well as everyone in the yard but someone walking along the sidewalk didn't :eek: The cops thought it was hilarious, but told me not to do that anymore:D

Another amusing incident was the day the fool who stole my beach cruiser rolled into the shop to air the tires. I was gonna get this guy, I'd recovered this bike two time previous and I was damned if I wasn't actually gonna confront the perp. So I came up with a game plan:

Me: "So how do you like my bike?"
Idiot: "Huh, what are you talking about?"
Me: "You have my bike, not for very long, but how do you like it?
Idiot: "I didn't steal it, my friend gave me this bike"
Me: "Great, give me his name so I can call the cops and bust you and him."

He looks really confused and trapped, its beautiful! I notice he's looking for a way out so I cut the cat and mouse game.

"All right heres the deal, you can give me it right now or I can kick your ass and take it back or have the cop settle this"

I take two quick steps and the kid about craps himself and runs, ahhhh sweet revenge! :D
 
J

JRB

Guest
I have a funny story. One time some gay ass roadie that worked in a shop said, "the only two things that come from Texas are steers and queers and I don't see no horns."

So I kicked him in the nuts :nuts: and called him a roadie homo. :D