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Slow news day...and so I give you this:

LordOpie

MOTHER HEN
Oct 17, 2002
21,022
3
Denver
Homemade Spear Used In Attempted Espresso Stand Robber

LAKEWOOD, Wash. -- Lakewood police are looking for a man who tried to hold up an espresso stand with a homemade spear.

Police said the weapon -- a butcher knife tied to a wooden dowl -- appeared designed to reach into the small building and threaten the barista.

Investigators said the young black man Issac Webber, 24, now has the nickname, "Spearchucker".
 

Inclag

Turbo Monkey
Sep 9, 2001
2,782
465
MA
Also in the news...


Exes Fight Over Atlanta Braves Tickets
ATLANTA, Jun. 7, 2007(AP) A woman is crying "Foul Ball!" about the way her ex-husband is distributing their behind-home-plate tickets to Atlanta Braves games.

H. Elizabeth King, a psychologist, accuses her ex, Charles Center, a lawyer, of breaking their 2002 divorce agreement on how to divide the tickets.

Before their divorce, King and Center had four tickets to 27 home games as part of a three-way, season-ticket partnership. Under their divorce agreement, he got the first home game, then each got 13 games.

But one of the partners died last year and King's ownership increased to a full third.

At the court hearing Tuesday, King claimed that Center, who is in charge of dispensing the tickets to the partners, goes out of his way to give her games that conflict with her schedule, and implied he gave her day games because she had skin cancer.

Center testified that he distributed tickets the way he always had: sequentially, according to a mathematical formula, adjusted when people asked or if there were conflicting schedules.

Superior Court Judge Melvin K. Westmoreland ruled he would not cite Center with contempt and urged the exes to settle it out of court.

When Center left the courtroom, he whooped in the hall outside: "I'm not going to jail! I'm not going to jail!"
 

MMike

A fowl peckerwood.
Sep 5, 2001
18,207
105
just sittin' here drinkin' scotch
A homemade spear? Can you buy mass produced spears?
What? You've never heard of Point-T-Boys line of fine spears? They have something for every budget. From the basic Impaler to the full Stab-o-Matic, Point-T-Boy can satisfy all of your spearing needs. Britney was going to be the spokesperson, but then she went nuts, and the deal fell trhough.
 

dhbuilder

jingoistic xenophobe
Aug 10, 2005
3,040
0
even if ted kennedy and sarah brady were able to round up all of the firearms on the face of the earth..................

where there's a will, there's a way.
i guess soon we'll have to register our silverware with the gov't.
and well have to show i.d. to get broom handles.
 

MMike

A fowl peckerwood.
Sep 5, 2001
18,207
105
just sittin' here drinkin' scotch
even if ted kennedy and sarah brady were able to round up all of the firearms on the face of the earth..................

where there's a will, there's a way.
i guess soon we'll have to register our silverware with the gov't.
and well have to show i.d. to get broom handles.

Someone really should explain the difference to you


 

Westy

the teste
Nov 22, 2002
56,448
22,542
Sleazattle
even if ted kennedy and sarah brady were able to round up all of the firearms on the face of the earth..................

where there's a will, there's a way.
i guess soon we'll have to register our silverware with the gov't.
and well have to show i.d. to get broom handles.
All those gang related drive by spearchuckings and those mass school stabbings are getting out of control.
 

LordOpie

MOTHER HEN
Oct 17, 2002
21,022
3
Denver
even if ted kennedy and sarah brady were able to round up all of the firearms on the face of the earth..................

where there's a will, there's a way.
I support the gun ownership and the only truly human way to eat meat is to kill a wild animal, that said...

that's a falacy about people still will kill. Ok, sure they will, but the point about guns is that it's easy to kill many people quickly. I'm positive I could disarm someone using a spear, not so sure about a gun from 10feet away.
 

dhbuilder

jingoistic xenophobe
Aug 10, 2005
3,040
0
Someone really should explain the difference to you


at fifty yards away, they blow up so nice when you hit them dead center.

f'in with you people is so damn easy and fun.
just grab the ring in your nose and pull you all around the pen.
you moo an moo but it doesn't do you any good.
at the end of the day, you're still just one of the herd.
and the next morning you're miked all over again.

:biggrin:
 

dhbuilder

jingoistic xenophobe
Aug 10, 2005
3,040
0
you must be joking. like there's any message that you your little pals have to say, that i'd seriously listen to.

you're nobody.

you think way too much of yourself.
 

ohio

The Fresno Kid
Nov 26, 2001
6,649
26
SF, CA
How else are you supposed to show the severity of your not caring if it's not logging on daily and typing out in detail just how much you don't care?
I was thinking of building a tribute shrine to my lack-of-interest and total-indifference. Do you think it should be one shrine or does it have to be two separate edificeseseses?

Something modest, you know, like the Statue of Liberty.
 

kidwoo

Artisanal Tweet Curator
I was thinking of building a tribute shrine to my lack-of-interest and total-indifference. Do you think it should be one shrine or does it have to be two separate edificeseseses?

Something modest, you know, like the Statue of Liberty.
Whatever it is, your indifference will only be properly served by complete immersion in the endeavor. There can be no half measures.