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So I drove my wife home from a party....in my patrol car..

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manimal

manimal

Ociffer Tackleberry
Feb 27, 2002
7,213
22
Blindly running into cactus
she's NEVER been drunk before and got hammered at a "girls night out" with some moms from her playgroup thingy (group of moms that get together to talk/gossip while the kids play :rolleyes:

so anyway, it's a friday night and busy as crap when i get a call. "honey....(sad/confused/drunk tone of voice)..can you come pick me up, i think i'm too drunk to drive"

so i head over to her friends house and i quickly become the center of attention for her drunk friends and especially the host who keeps shouting how hot i am in uniform :confused: :think: in front of my wife. so then they start chanting like i'm a dancer at a strip club. too bad i was on duty :cool: ;) so i pretty much drug her out of there and placed her in my car for the ride home.

so i'm sure this is nothing unusual for most of you but it's a big day in my life and especially our marriage. i've been trying for years to get her drunk, just once, to see how she'll react. man was it funny :thumb: the only bummer is that she had to wake up at 5am to drive to Florida to see her sick granfather.

pics
pretty good at the 2 drink shuffle for her first time (she's the one in the green shirt on the right)


Officer Manimal arrives on scene (cue 70's porn music, bow-chika-bow-wow)


drunk chick throwing rabbit ears over what would have been a cute pic of my wife and the host almost falling over


did i mention that my wife rocks?
 
pdawg

pdawg

Monkey
Feb 27, 2006
310
0
Espoo, Finland
That's classic... I'm sure that many cops get that showing up to an all ladies party... "Oh, look... the stripper is here". Next time bring a boom box to go with that full monty. :D
 
manimal

manimal

Ociffer Tackleberry
Feb 27, 2002
7,213
22
Blindly running into cactus
ha..i thought about it but couldn't find a boombox on short notice. there are, however, some photos taken while i was there that cannot be posted due to the risk of getting me fired :devil: :D
 
Westy

Westy

the teste
Nov 22, 2002
56,016
22,047
Sleazattle
DRB said:
Did you cuff her and toss her in the back?
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Only after emptying his pepper spray and killing the battery on his tazer.....








To quickly cook up a spicy pork chop for the hungry ladies of course.
 
geargrrl

geargrrl

Turbo Monkey
May 2, 2002
2,379
1
pnw -dry side
That's great she called. I wouldn't expect less from a LEO family, you guys have to deal with the aftereffects of drunk driving first hand. If more people would fess up to need to NOT drive, this world would be a much safer place.

gg
 
nikwho

nikwho

Monkey
Jun 16, 2006
117
0
Flagstaff, Az
reminds me of a drunken night that i had with my girlfriend and my pr-24 after graduating swat school! good times.. i have yet to look at my baton the same way ever since! sorry, i didn't mean to get to graphic, but i couldn't help but to plant the seed.... i have pictures too! hahaha i hope she doesn't look on here....!
 
manimal

manimal

Ociffer Tackleberry
Feb 27, 2002
7,213
22
Blindly running into cactus
JohnE said:
Did you administer any FSTs? Good call from the Frau!
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haha...i should have but i was on the clock and needed to get back. it's a weird phone call to make to your Lieutenant to ask if it's ok to pick up your drunk wife from a party :D

i'm just mad that i wasn't able to take advantage of the inebriation when i got her home:angry: ;)
 
manimal

manimal

Ociffer Tackleberry
Feb 27, 2002
7,213
22
Blindly running into cactus
dirtydirtysouf said:
Milfs?
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yes, but they're both taken. my wife gets a kick out of hearing me call her a milf :love:

...and it's a good thing that i'm not the hot-headed overprotective jealous type that would take your comment the wrong way...considering we live in the same town and all :think: :cool:
 
llkoolkeg

llkoolkeg

Ranger LL
Sep 5, 2001
4,335
15
in da shed, mon, in da shed
manimal said:
i'm just mad that i wasn't able to take advantage of the inebriation when i got her home:angry: ;)
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Any why the heck not? Your boss wouldn't know exactly down to the minute when you got her home, and even if he did, you could have always done the dirty deed after your shift was over. Who knows- she might've been so tanked that you could have gotten away with acts normally forbidden by sobriety and human decency! Even if she woke up midstroke, you could have always played it off like she was acting all amorous when you climbed into bed!
 
johnbryanpeters

johnbryanpeters

Hero
Sep 27, 2001
36,818
18,395
Making moss sad in New Haven, Vermont
llkoolkeg said:
Any why the heck not? Your boss wouldn't know exactly down to the minute when you got her home, and even if he did, you could have always done the dirty deed after your shift was over. Who knows- she might've been so tanked that you could have gotten away with acts normally forbidden by sobriety and human decency! Even if she woke up midstroke, you could have always played it off like she was acting all amorous when you climbed into bed!
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Maybe because he has retained his moral compass?
 
JohnE

JohnE

filthy rascist
May 13, 2005
13,550
2,180
Front Range, dude...
I was designated drinker the other day for an FST class...
5 Crown and Cokes later, blew a .20 and got driven home in my wifes minivan by another woman!
 
jimmydean

jimmydean

The Official Meat of Ridemonkey
Sep 10, 2001
43,106
15,187
Portland, OR
That's a great story. You should have gotten a picture of her drunk in the back!

The last time I was in the back of a cop car was 4th of July 3 years ago in Guam. I was walking home from a bar (buzzed, but not hammered) and they gave me a ride back to the ship. They said it wasn't too safe where I was after dark, they were cool as hell.
 
manimal

manimal

Ociffer Tackleberry
Feb 27, 2002
7,213
22
Blindly running into cactus
llkoolkeg said:
Any why the heck not? Your boss wouldn't know exactly down to the minute when you got her home, [QUOTE\]

do you have any idea how long it takes to get in/out of uniform? holy crap, it's like dressing a knight for battle. i try and make it home for quickies when i get out of school early and they're not expecting me at work until later, but i usually have an hour or so to mess around. but a friday night on a pre-holiday weekend with a bunch of officers already tied up on the FIRST stabbing of the night :eek: as much as i would have loved to stay home a bit...i can't leave my bro's hanging like that.

llkoolkeg said:
and even if he did, you could have always done the dirty deed after your shift was over. [QUOTE\]

haha..first time drunk; she was asleep as soon as i laid her in the bed. besides, i didn't get off work until 630am and she was already up getting ready for her trip to FL...albeit groggy :D

oh but wait until she sees all the work i've done at the new house...a joyous reunion will be had :devil: :thumb:
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