[Reactor]

My father who had stage III small cell lung cancer is now in the Hospice. His chest tumors had shrunk while undergoing chemo , but he now has lesions on the brain. Apparently he went from fine on Saturday morning, to hallucinations and incoherence on Saturday night. He's had a couple of radiation therapy episodes and is somewhat better but his doctor has limited him to nine treatments and says he has only a few days left. He can't walk and fell out of bed earlier this week and had to go to the ER. My brothers just told me today, and I went to see him.

I'm having some trouble dealing with it. I just changed jobs so I have to go to work tomorrow, at least for a little while, but at least I have Friday off. If anyone wonders why I haven't been around much the last month or so....This, my job and spending a little time with the family haven't left me with much time.

 

[Brian HCM#1]

Sorry to hear about your dad, my thoughts and prayers are with you & your family. We're all here for you!!!

 

[LordOpie]

That sucks!

I remember spending 20 hours a day in a hospice for two months when my dad was dying. I'm sorry for what you are and will go through.

 

[kinghami3]

I'm sorry to hear about that, what a tragedy!

 

[CrabJoe StretchPants]

sorry to hear that, that is a shame

 

[Reactor]

Thanks all.

I'm heading off to bed soon.

 

[N8 v2.0]

Hey man...

My pops had congestive heart diese... he came home from the hospital and the hospice people set up a bed and everything at my parents home. A hospice nurse came in every day to check him until the end (6 weeks). The nice thing was that he got to be at home in his last days...

I always miss him.

My best wishes to he and you.

 

[Reactor]

Hey man...

My pops had congestive heart diese... he came home from the hospital and the hospice people set up a bed and everything at my parents home. A hospice nurse came in every day to check him until the end (6 weeks). The nice thing was that he got to be at home in his last days...

I always miss him.

My best wishes to he and you.

Thanks, N8.

It's hard..Last week he had a CAT scan and they thought he could live several years because the tumors were shrinking, and now it looks like maybe a week or two at the most. What sucks is that he had a hard life, and never really got to enjoy retirement.

 

[Jeremy R]

Sorry man, that is very sad to hear.
My grandfather passed away while on Hospice.
They are there to comfort the family and to keep him as comfortable as possible. When my grandfather died he had all 16 people in our family standing around his bedside. It was a very peaceful and loving way to go.
If it is your father's time to go, all you can do is be there for him and your family. Best wishes.

 

[maxyedor]

Sorry to hear that, but if I could offer any tidbit of advice it's to spend as much time as possible with him. When my Grandfather was given two months to live, he had pretty severe lung cancer, I figured I would stay and talk to him as much as I could even if he couldn't realy talk back. He ended up dying a few days later and spending that time with him made it easier in some odd way, for both him and me.

 

[hooples3]

I am so sorry to hear about you dad.. I know its not easy, hang in there. I went through a similar thing last year with my mom.. stage III small cell lung as well. Things were not looking good for a while and i went through the hardest time of my life.Fortunatly things worked out well for my mom. I feel for you and know where you are coming from.. God bless you and your family.

 

[binary visions]

So sorry to hear about that... Spend as much time as possible with him, as I am sure you are doing. My condolances and best wishes for you and your family in this hard time

 

[JRB]

Sorry to hear, Reactor. I'm not going into I know how you feel. I am saying mother died in hospice care with breast cancer in '98. If you need anything, and I mean that, PM me and I will get you contact info.

God bless you and your family.

 

[PonySoldier]

Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family....

 

[dan-o]

Reading this thread brought all the pain of my father's passing back. Best wishes to you and your family.

 

[SkaredShtles]

My old man died back in '95 of cancer. I still get sad every time I think about it.

Good luck to you, Reactor and hang in there.

 

[pixelninja]

I'm so sorry to hear this. Thoughts and prayers to you and your family

 

[ktmsx]

cancer sux..!!!!!! I wish you the best....

 

[stinkyboy]

I too went through this, and I know what your feeling.

I'll pray for him.

 

[TreeSaw]

I am SO sorry to hear this!!! My thoughts and prayers go out to your family during this awful time. Try to spend time with him now, but more importantly, remember all the good times you had together when he was healthy and happy!

 

[johnbryanpeters]

Thinking of you and your father, good luck.

 

[sinisteridge]

im so sorry to hear that man, im right with you on this one. recently my families best freind went into hospice and passed, and just 2 days ago the same thing happened to my grandmother who had limphoma and lukemia for 15 years, talk about a fighter. i know how you feel man, its tough.
god bless man

 

[robdamanii]

Sorry to hear about your dad. There's never anything that you can say that helps to make it better. My grandfather passed in a similar situation back in 99 from mesothelioma. The hospice was just so depressing. Keep your chin up man.

 

[urbaindk]

Sorry to hear about your Dad. My wife's Grandmother is getting ready to go through the same thing. She was just diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer. She's doing chemo now to try to get it under control but they are only giving her a few months to live. They are going to call in hospice when the time comes so she can stay at home.

My wife and her sister are driving down to NC this weekend to make one of her last visits with their Grandmother. Man that's tough.

 

[Ciaran]

I am very sorry to hear about your father. My thoughts and prayers go to your family this day.

 

[narlus]

not much to add here, aside from thoughts and support.

 

[brungeman]

I am very sorry to hear about your dad. It is tough at times like these to come up with words that can express how deeply we all feel for what you are going through. I wish you and your family the best during this tough time. My thoughts are with you.

 

[Total Heckler]

Sorry to hear about that man. Things like that are always really hard. My brother almost died from cancer 6 years ago he had Non-Hotchkins Lymphoma at 18. The chemo and radiation actually got rid of it completely. Now he is going to be a dad in 7 months! Stay positive. =]

 

[Reactor]

Thanks everyone. My work let me off early, and I had tomorrow off already so I'm going to spend as much time as possible with him over the next few days.

 

[partsbara]

all the best to you and the old man mate... just rest assured that although he had a tough retirement from the sounds of it (and possibly a tough knock at the game of life ??) he undoubtedly had some great times... you and him remember the laughs fella.. thats the cherry right there...

all the best.....

 

[urbaindk]

My wife worked on a research study of end of life care with UNC. Most people she interviewed had a very high opinion of hospice care. They will do everything in their power to make your father's last days as comfortable as possible.

Best wishes.

 

[Serial Midget]

Why not explain your family crisis to your employer? I just hired a new employee last week - after just one day of training she called and said her mother was in the final stages of cancer and would most likley expire in the next few days - I gave her an indefinate period of time to deal with her family situation. I'd be a real ass not to - who wants to work for a company that is not willing to be flexible when it comes to your personal life? If your new employer isn't willing to be flexible then they don't deserve you as an employee.

Family is more important anyway - money comes and goes.

 

[golgiaparatus]

Sorry to hear that man. I hope he is in no pain and is relatively peaceful.

 

[partsbara]

Why not explain your family crisis to your employer? I just hired a new employee last week - after just one day of training she called and said her mother was in the final stages of cancer and would most likley expire in the next few days - I gave her an indefinate period of time to deal with her family situation. I'd be a real ass not to - who wants to work for a company that is not willing to be flexible when it comes to your personal life? If your new employer isn't willing to be flexible then they don't deserve you as an employee.

Family is more important anyway - money comes and goes.

bingo... good to see ya around SM

 

[Shyrmp]

Sorry to hear about your dad. Hang in there. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.

 

[mantispf2000]

Well, most of you know my story of losing a loved one. Reactor, spend the time with your dad. Looks like you're getting that chance. It'll be the best thing you did, and not have any regrets.

 

[Changleen]

I hope everything goes as well as it possibly can. Good luck to you both.

 

[splat]

Reactor , sorry to hear about your dad. I went through a similar thing. I changed jobs , and My father had a Massive stroke. he lasted 6 months in a Nursing home. that was on 01-02 , It still hurts.

Be strong

 

[biggins]

i am quitting smoking because of this thread.

 

[Reactor]

i am quitting smoking because of this thread.

Biggins,

If even one positive thing happens because of this thread, it will make this a little better.

When I saw my dad today he was a little better. The anti-psychotic drugs and radiation therapy are helping a little. He is lucid (more or less) but has some definite problems. The brain tumors have caused him to lose most of his muscle control. He sleeps at least half the time. I won't go into details, but this isn't the way would I want to die.




Thanks to everyone for the good wishes.