[loco-gringo]

So some guy comes in to try and sell movie passes. I asked if he wanted to buy a bike. He said "no". I told him we sell bikes here, not buy movie passes. He got pissed and left. WTF do these guys think is going to happen??? Here's a news flash, I'm smart and I'll find you if I want to buy your sh*t.

 

[I Are Baboon]

This is an awesome thread.

 

[pinkshirtphotos]

Bet it was a little kid making money for a fundraiser. You just ruined a kids future.

 

[ultraNoob]

A couple days ago, a swami guru looking guy walks into the shop.

Swami: You look like a very successful businessman. In can tell your future and maybe you will be more successful.

Me: I can predict your future.

Swami: Really? Well then, what do you see? (said this kinda smug like)

Me: I predict that you will not make money off of me today.

He turns and walks away.

 

[moff_quigley]

My family and I went to Chicago this past weekend...we grabbed a quick bite at a fast food place the last night we were there. While we're waiting for our food this guy comes in with the spikey hair and eyeliner on like the "hot chicks with douchebags" guys. He goes up to the guy working the counter shows him a cosmetic catalog and asks him if he wanted to buy some makeup. I thought it was pretty funny. The worker...not so much.

 

[stinkyboy]

 

[sanjuro]

Our attitude at the shop started thanks to Bernie Mikkelsen, who once had this dialog with a telemarketer:

Bernie: We sell bikes here. Do you ride?
TM: No sir, I don't ride.
Bernie: Why, are you fat?
[click. dialtone]

The owner will go off about how he pays rent and you don't. My favorite is some young punk, and I asked him do you own a bike, he said this:

"Yes, I own a Mustang GT 5.0"

I still imitate the way he said it everytime a douchebag comes into the shop.

 

[splat]

This is an awesome thread.

they don't get much better lthumbsdown:

 

[Westy]

This is an awesome thread.

It is




now!!

 

[IH8Rice]

we used to get people trying to sell "these awesome speakers that my boss got real cheap, and now has to sell asap," a lot.

theyd pull up on you fast in their molester/kidnapper van and pull their shtick

 

[jerseydirt]

I played music into the phone during a sales call. Apparently they are not allowed to hang up on you.

 

[KavuRider]

theyd pull up on you fast in their molester/kidnapper van and pull their shtick

And how else am I supposed to buy new bikes?

lol.

I get them quite a bit at work, even though we have a "No Soliciting" sign. They never see it.
I just wish I had it next to my desk, then I could just tap on it and not have to say a word to them.
And the boss doesn't like the idea of me keeping a loaded 12 gauge near the door...

 

[demo 9]

I played music into the phone during a sales call. Apparently they are not allowed to hang up on you.

ive heard that unless u say u DO NOT WANT THE PRODUCT, fvck or shlt they have to talk, you can sit and talk for house and decrease their productivity, but u give urs up in return

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

ive heard that unless u say u DO NOT WANT THE PRODUCT, fvck or shlt they have to talk, you can sit and talk for house and decrease their productivity, but u give urs up in return

That gave me a headache to read.

 

[ultraNoob]

we used to get people trying to sell "these awesome speakers that my boss got real cheap, and now has to sell asap," a lot.

theyd pull up on you fast in their molester/kidnapper van and pull their shtick

they pull their shtick out for you?! Wow, they must like you better than me... all they do is show me a flyer or a pic or two

 

[loco-gringo]

Got a call from a company that I had an accidental insurance policy at lunch today. Since they chose to call my cell phone to solicit some auto deal they have, I no longer have their insurance. I want to be left the f*#k alone. I'll call those assholes if I want to buy something. Jesus...why is everyone so anxious to bother me???

I called to cancel and they asked if I had asked to not be called. I said, no. And I hadn't. I also bought insurance from them, not request that they solicit me for auto sh*t. Losers.

 

[Demomonkey]

We have one guy that comes in regularly and just leaves 3 year old children s books and pieces of crap you'd never want on the kitchen table in the office. I don't think anyone has bought anything off him in two years. His sales diminished when the only person with children of young age left.

We have another guy that comes in weekly with a huge chiller of fresh salmon, scallops, muscles, kingfish and other goodies. Now HE get a lot of business from us.

 

[ultraNoob]

I get walking salesmen/women all the time. If it's a hot chick on a hot day, I'll take a few minutes to chat and check her merchandise . Truthfully, the only thing I've purchased from them over the past 5 years are 2-3 umbrellas (cuz they sell the ones with the telescopic umbrella sheath), an airsoft gun that looked like an m16 with an M203 Launcher, and $5 coupons good or a $20 haircut at Sport Clips.

The moment I see children stuff, I usually say, sorry. I don't have any kids at all, especially none that I know of. Other times I just say, yea, your buddy was just here.

 

[Ciaran]

We should all call Loco and offer to sell him crap.

 

[ultraNoob]

We should all call Loco and offer to sell him crap that was scraped of the carpet in Stinkyboy's office.

agreed! what's his #?

 

[Arkayne]

 

[stinkyboy]