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stuff white people like

Toshi

Harbinger of Doom
Oct 23, 2001
38,029
7,549
http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/

it's spot on.

the latest entry, hit the link for more:

stuffwhitepeoplelike said:
#87 Outdoor Performance Clothes
March 11, 2008 by clander



As white people get older, they like to make clear boundaries between their professional and personal lives. They don’t mind talking about their personal life at work, but they hate talking about their work life when they are enjoying a weekend or vacation. But with blackberries and laptops, white people could be working anywhere, at any time. So how do you know when they are off the clock? It’s easy, check their clothes.

When white people aren’t working, they generally like to wear Outdoor Performance Clothes. The top suppliers of these garments and accessories include North Face, REI, Mountain Equipment Co-Op, Columbia Sportswear, and Patagonia.

When you see white people wearing these, it is important that you do not discuss business matters. Instead you should say things like “where did you get that fleece?” and “what’s that thing holding your keys to your shorts?” White people will be more than happy to talk to you about their sustainably produced possessions.

The main reason why white people like these clothes is that it allows them to believe that at any moment they could find themselves with a Thule rack on top of their car headed to a national park. It could be 4:00 p.m. on a Saturday when they might get a call “hey man, you know what we need to do? Kayak then camping, right now. I’m on my way to get you, there is no time to change clothes.”

Though it is unlikely that they will receive this call, White people hate the idea of missing an opportunity to enjoy outdoor activities because they weren’t wearing the right clothes.

If you plan on spending part of your weekend with a white person, it is strongly recommended that you purchase a jacket or some sort of “high performance” t-shirt, which is like a regular shirt but just a lot more expensive.

Posted in Activities, Products, Work | 467 Comments »
 

gonefirefightin

free wieners
I feel alot better knowing all of my daily garments are of mountain hardware/ marmot quality.....................................

just a side note, I actually use my clothing for its intended purpose.

"high performance elemental barrier active wear"

read about that on your free time while know one cares, asian man

lol , good luck on your driving test

PS. can you do my math test?
 

Toshi

Harbinger of Doom
Oct 23, 2001
38,029
7,549
racist....
soooooo many of my friends from my snooty undergrad alma mater and grad school here fit the site's description to a T...

incidentally the description of white peoples' love for fixies (somewhere around entry 65 iirc) is great. :D

here we go, entry 61:

http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/02/10/61-bicycles/

stuffwhitepeoplelike said:
#61 Bicycles
February 10, 2008 by clander




A good place to find white people on a Saturday is at a Bike Shop. Bike shops are almost entirely staffed and patronized by white people!

But not all white people love bicycles in the same way, there is much diversity. First up, we have the younger urban white folks who absolutely love their fixed gear bicycles. These are seen all over college towns, Silverlake in LA, Williamsburg in Brooklyn, Queen West in Toronto, and Victoria, British Columbia. Fixed gear bicycles meet a lot of requirements for white person acceptance. They can be made from older (i.e. vintage) bicycles, thus allowing the rider to have a unique bike that is unlikely to be ridden by anyone else in town. They are also easily customizable with expensive things Aerospoke rims, Phil Wood Hubs, and Nitto Parts. The combination of rare bicycles and expensive parts makes it easy for white people to judge other white people on the quality and originality of their bicycles. This is important in determining if someone is or isn’t cooler than you.

White people also like Mountain Bikes because it lets them be in nature. It’s really not more complicated than that.

And finally, they love expensive Road Bikes and the accompanying spandex uniforms. This enables them to ride long distances and wear really tight clothes without any social stigmas. These types of riders will spend upwards of $5,000 on a bicycle and up to $400 on accessories, but will not ride to work. Perhaps because they cannot wear the spandex. It is important that you never question why someone needs a $5000 bicycle since the answer is always “performance.”



For the most part, these rules have been unisex. But there is a special category of bicycles that appeal far more to white women, the European city bike (pictured). White women have a lot of fantasies about idealized lives, and one of them is living in Europe and riding around an old city on one of these bikes. They dream about waking up and riding to a little cafe, then visiting bakeries and cheese shops and finally riding home to prepare a fancy meal for their friends who will all eat under a canopy with white Christmas lights. This information can be used to help gain the trust/admiration of a white woman, especially if you can pull off a lie about how your mother told you about how she used to do all of these things when she was younger.

And of course, it goes without saying that white people who ride bikes like to talk about how they are saving the earth. If you know a person who rides to work, you should take them aside and say “Hey, thanks. Sincerely, The Earth.” Then give a thumbs up. That white person will ride home on a cloud.


Posted in Activities | 255 Comments
 

Toshi

Harbinger of Doom
Oct 23, 2001
38,029
7,549
yeah white people suck....
the site's message isn't that, but rather finding humor in the way that post-college overeducated liberal types (that'd be me and my friends, except i'm not white) scramble to conform to a particular social role
 

Tenchiro

Attention K Mart Shoppers
Jul 19, 2002
5,407
0
New England
Damn, this site totally has my number... Sarah Silverman is awesome though and Dane cook is a joke stealing douche. :P
 

narlus

Eastcoast Softcore
Staff member
Nov 7, 2001
24,658
63
behind the viewfinder

narlus

Eastcoast Softcore
Staff member
Nov 7, 2001
24,658
63
behind the viewfinder
It is generally accepted that a gay black friend with a child is considered a once in a lifetime opportunity - like a quarterback who can pass, run, kick, and play linebacker. White people will crawl over each other for the opportunity to claim this person as a friend and add them to their roster of diversity.
:rofl:
 

narlus

Eastcoast Softcore
Staff member
Nov 7, 2001
24,658
63
behind the viewfinder
75, 77, 81, 82, 83, 84, 86, 87.

i'm guilty of all of those, and that's just the first page...
here's my tally:
1, 5, 10, 11, 19, 20, 23, 24, 35, 41 (arguably, but not by their definition), 42, 51 if i could afford to, 54, 58, 61, 67, 79 (though i don't own any), 84, 86

They also believe that their dogs share similar tastes in food - “Little Ben Kweller likes the Organic food the best.” Forgetting the fact that dogs enjoy eating their own feces, and pretty much anything that falls onto the floor.
:clapping:
 

skinny mike

Turbo Monkey
Jan 24, 2005
6,415
0
my official tally:
1, 6, 8, 10, 15, 18, 19, 23, 31, 33, 35, 39, 40, 41, 42, 48, 50, 51, 53, 58, 61, 64, 68, 69, 72, 77, 81, 82, 83, 84, 86, 87
 

sanjuro

Tube Smuggler
Sep 13, 2004
17,373
0
SF
I thought a lot about this, and this reminds me of a statement I made, "I have never seen a black woman on a serious bike ride".

Without debating about my conclusions or the racism of my statement, because I am sure there are black female cyclists, I do wonder if minorities don't get out and participate in certain leisure activities.

Possibly they come from a culture of seriousness which prevents them from enjoying what they consider frivolous.

Speaking for Chinese, sometimes, I think they are missing out.
 

Toshi

Harbinger of Doom
Oct 23, 2001
38,029
7,549
more background (it's written by a white canadian expat living in LA! he appears in the photos -- this is his life :D)

http://theassimilatednegro.blogspot.com/2008/02/stuff-white-people-like-interview-part.html

part1 said:
TAN: do you consider yourself aligned with the white people you profile? You're white, but are you whom you describe/study?

SWPL: oh yes. this site pokes fun at ME. that's why I use pictures of myself. those aren't taken out of irony. this is the **** that I do. I need to call myself out for all of the stupid **** that I take for granted. why do I need $300 bike rims? why is a $10 sandwich considered normal?
http://theassimilatednegro.blogspot.com/2008/02/stuff-white-people-like-interview-part_25.html

part2 said:
TAN: The comments are pretty funny. Especially those that get their pants in a bunch. How do you feel about the commenters? Do you wish the PC police would go away? Do you think they all enhance the site?

SWPL: When I first started the site and we were getting a few comments, the angry ones hurt me. Especially the ones calling me racist. But I let them go, and watched as people stepped up to defend me and the blog. It was a good reminder that not everyone is going to get it, but the ones that do make it all worth it.

And in general, the comments are vital and essential to the site. I love seeing a mix of positivity and hate on there, people are talking, and that's always a good thing. Even if it's just on a ridiculous blog.
White like us -- LA Times

the LA times said:
Lander is gently making fun of the many progressive, educated, upper-middle-class whites who think they are beyond ethnicity or collectively shared tastes, styles or outlook. He's essentially reminding them that they too are part of a group.

"I'm writing about the white people who think they're absolutely unique and individual," Lander told me. "I'm calling them out and poking fun of myself. The things I post are all the things I like too!"


And what are those things? Recycling, expensive sandwiches, standing still at concerts, Toyota Priuses, natural medicine, irony, public radio, breakfast places, vegetarianism, organic foods and being an expert on ethnic cultures are just a few.
 

Toshi

Harbinger of Doom
Oct 23, 2001
38,029
7,549
here's my tally:
1, 5, 10, 11, 19, 20, 23, 24, 35, 41 (arguably, but not by their definition), 42, 51 if i could afford to, 54, 58, 61, 67, 79 (though i don't own any), 84, 86
my half-white damage :D :

6: organic food
8: barack obama
16: gifted children :lol:
18: awareness of issues -- see $20 thread
19: traveling
23: microbreweries -- Acadian is the most guilty here, i fear
26: manhattan -- did i mention i grew up there? <insertwhitepeoplestatushere>
28: not having a TV
31: snowboarding, ok, skiing
40: apple products! 'nuf said.
58: japan!
60: toyota prius
61: bicycles
75: threatening to move to canada (new zealand)
78: multilingual children
81: graduate school
87: outdoor performance clothes, although most people in seattle dress this way, too. then again, most people in seattle fit the stereotype...
 

jaydee

Monkey
Jul 5, 2001
794
0
Victoria BC
I thought white people liked rap music and FUBU clothes. Go figure. How many black people have Billy Ray Cyrus collections and wear parkas?
 

Jeremy R

<b>x</b>
Nov 15, 2001
9,698
1,053
behind you with a snap pop
"For the past three years, whenever you say “The Wire” white people are required to respond by saying “it’s the best show on television.” Try it the next time you see a white person! Though now they might say “it WAS the best show on television.”

so guilty of this.:busted:

I have never had more fun laughing at myself than reading this blog.
I am either guilty of doing them or I make fun of people who are guilty for doing them.
 

manimal

Ociffer Tackleberry
Feb 27, 2002
7,212
17
Blindly running into cactus
It is a poorly guarded secret that, deep down, white people believe if given money and education that all poor people would be EXACTLY like them. In fact, the only reason that poor people make the choices they do is because they have not been given the means to make the right choices and care about the right things.
:rofl: this is almost the exact verbal beating i gave my "understanding oppressive systems" class last semester about the difference in what BS they were forcing down my throat vs. reality.
i like this list :thumb: oh yeah, i'm not white, i'm a freckled american.
 

Toshi

Harbinger of Doom
Oct 23, 2001
38,029
7,549
The REAL "Stuff White People Like" via OkCupid's dataminers.

What is it that makes a culture unique? How are whites, blacks, Asians, or whoever different from everybody else? What tastes, interests, and concepts define an ethnic group? And is there any way to make fun of other races in public and get away with it?
These are big questions, and here's how we answered them.

We selected 526,000 OkCupid users at random and divided them into groups by their (self-stated) race. We then took all these people's profile essays (280 million words in total!) and isolated the words and phrases that made each racial group's essays statistically distinct from the others'.

For instance, it turns out that all kinds of people list sushi as one of their favorite foods. But Asians are the only group who also list sashimi; it's a racial outlier. Similarly, as we shall see, black people are 20 times more likely than everyone else to mention soul food, whereas no foods are distinct for white people, unless you count diet coke.


At the link there's also stuff white women/black people/Latinos/Latinas/Asians like, too.
 

sanjuro

Tube Smuggler
Sep 13, 2004
17,373
0
SF
I thought it was interesting that Asian men are more likely to identify their race, like Korean or Japanese, whereas Asian women don't.