[Tenchiro]

Jump to Prevent Global Warming
German Artist Claims World Jump Day Could Save the Planet

July 17, 2006 -- Hans Peter Niesward, from the Department of Gravitationsphysik at the ISA in Munich, says we can stop global warming in one fell swoop — or, more accurately, in one big jump.

The slightly disheveled professor states his case on WorldJumpDay.org, an Internet site created to recruit 600,000,000 people to jump simultaneously on July 20 at 11:39:13 GMT in an effort to shift Earth's position.

Now if we can only get Van Halen to get back together with David Lee Roth...

 

[Secret Squirrel]

And....now!.....no.......NOW!......damn it people.....NOW!......crap....this'll never work...

 

[LordOpie]

And....now!.....no.......NOW!......damn it people.....NOW!......crap....this'll never work...

makes me think of the behind the scenes special of SeaLab 2021

 

[ALEXIS_DH]

what about if 300 million people jump in australia, and 300 million jump in canada?????

what if its a side hope, would that make a curve ball?

i´ll just let my refrigerator door wide open to contribute to a colder earth...

 

[LordOpie]

what if its a side hope...

<cue music>
Let's do the time warp again...

 

[MudGrrl]

The US has a lot of fat people......maybe we can shift the earth.

 

[binary visions]

The US has a lot of fat people......maybe we can shift the earth.

If all the fat people jumped simultaneously, though, they'd send the earth careening off into space. As fun as that sounds, I'd like to get my new frame built up before we all go crashing into the sun.

 

[MMike]

Would you need to get everyone on one side? The aussie jumpers would cancel out the the Canada jumpers..... and there's only 30M people in Canada anyway....

I think we should just concentrate on Van Halen

 

[Westy]

All the fat people are already helping out. Their tremendous shadows help cool the earth. We need more fat people!!

Doesn't anyone watch Futurama? This one was already figured out, we just need to have everyone fart at the sun to propel the earth farther away.

 

[MMike]

All the fat people are already helping out. Their tremendous shadows help cool the earth. We need more fat people!!

Doesn't anyone watch Futurama? This one was already figured out, we just need to have everyone fart at the sun to propel the earth farther away.

That's just stupid....you run the risk of igniting the farts and the whole planet could be incinerated! Where is your head???

 

[Westy]

That's just stupid....you run the risk of igniting the farts and the whole planet could be incinerated! Where is your head???

People are already farting dumb-ass. We just need to tap into an ignored resource.

 

[MMike]

But directed at the sun?????

 

[Westy]

But directed at the sun?????

Yeah so the thrust of the flatuli pushes us farther away from the sun. It is pretty complicated I wouldn't expect you to understand it.

 

[Tenchiro]

All I know is if I wake up that morning and we are careening into the sun, I am going to kick that guys ass.

 

[LordOpie]

I think we should just concentrate on Girls on Trampolines.

Amen.