This is the time of year when we usually see magazine and newspaper articles looking back at the year that was. How about a peek at the future.....
Headlines From Year 2029:
> Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh
> largest country in the world, California.
Minorities still trying to have English recognized as
> California's third language.
> Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and
> livestock.
> Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
> Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of
> the Middle East(formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria
andLebanon).
> Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10
> more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
> France pleads for global help after being overtaken by Jamaica.
> Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported
> legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
> George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
> Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces
> mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
> 85-year study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.
> Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
> Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter
> speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
> Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
> Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil
rights.
> Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.
> New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly
> swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
> Congress authorizes direct deposit of illegal political contributions
> to campaign accounts.
> IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75%.
> Florida Democrats still don't know how to use a voting machine.
Headlines From Year 2029:
> Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh
> largest country in the world, California.
Minorities still trying to have English recognized as
> California's third language.
> Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and
> livestock.
> Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
> Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of
> the Middle East(formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria
andLebanon).
> Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10
> more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
> France pleads for global help after being overtaken by Jamaica.
> Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported
> legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
> George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
> Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces
> mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
> 85-year study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.
> Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
> Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter
> speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
> Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
> Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil
rights.
> Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.
> New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly
> swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
> Congress authorizes direct deposit of illegal political contributions
> to campaign accounts.
> IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75%.
> Florida Democrats still don't know how to use a voting machine.
