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Vaginal Pornography

Metal

President of FRONJ
Oct 17, 2001
542
7
Orange County, CA
I am kinda confused as to why online mountain bikers refer to their bikes and parts as porn. Do you masturbate to the pictures or something.

He is a picture of my SlEAze Otter mountain cross race bike. I have it rigged up with no front brake because if I am using it, I am going too slow, and a 3 speed cassette in the rear. 1 gear for gate-starts, and the other 2 depending on how fast the course is. I rigged this wheel up from a formerly single-speed wheel off of a Specialized P1.

It currently has a bunch of stickers from companies that aren't sponsoring me, so those will be peeled of or masked over.

viva la FRONJ
 

Juano

Monkey
Feb 12, 2003
328
0
my hi-use
Originally posted by Metal
I am kinda confused as to why online mountain bikers refer to their bikes and parts as porn. Do you masturbate to the pictures or something.

He is a picture of my SlEAze Otter mountain cross race bike. I have it rigged up with no front brake because if I am using it, I am going too slow, and a 3 speed cassette in the rear. 1 gear for gate-starts, and the other 2 depending on how fast the course is. I rigged this wheel up from a formerly single-speed wheel off of a Specialized P1.

It currently has a bunch of stickers from companies that aren't sponsoring me, so those will be peeled of or masked over.

viva la FRONJ
I definity agree with it being gay tp call bike pic's porn. WTF!!!!!!!!!
 

SebringMGB

Monkey
Feb 6, 2004
482
1
Washington
i think porn is ok terminology, as long as its something really sick. if you post a pic of your newest cable housing, your fresh rattle canned pedals or your bone stock giant warp, its like saying a pic of your 3 year old cousin swimming naked at your cabin is porn
 

Toshi

butthole powerwashing evangelist
Oct 23, 2001
39,638
8,683
Originally posted by the Inbred
post a pic of the hub/cassette. pwease.
ditto, sounds interesting. i agree with the anti-"porn" sentiment, too
 

T-Pirate

RESPECT!
Sep 28, 2003
1,780
0
Boone, NC/N. Greenville county, SC
Nice bike dude. I hate when people call stuff "porn" If you see me use that terminology, I am definately joking, because I hate when people post lame stuff and call it porn. (The spray paint pedal "porn" post was a joke)
 

Juano

Monkey
Feb 12, 2003
328
0
my hi-use
Originally posted by T-Pirate
Nice bike dude. I hate when people call stuff "porn" If you see me use that terminology, I am definately joking, because I hate when people post lame stuff and call it porn. (The spray paint pedal "porn" post was a joke)
IF I ever post porn it will be PORN, most like midgets and donkey's.
 

Full Trucker

Frikkin newb!!!
Feb 26, 2003
11,097
8,696
Exit, CO
Originally posted by Juano
IF I ever post porn it will be PORN, most like midgets and donkey's.
Or three-toed midget donkey porn!

And hey Metal, I hate to be 'that guy' here... but you'll probably HAVE to put a front brake on it to legally race it at Spray Utter... it's a NORBA thing I think... 'three working gears and two working brakes' or something...

Of course, if you put a hydro up front and neglect to put any fluid it it, that would accomplish the same thing as having no front brake. And no one would be any the wiser...
 

Metal

President of FRONJ
Oct 17, 2001
542
7
Orange County, CA
Originally posted by Full Trucker
Or three-toed midget donkey porn!

And hey Metal, I hate to be 'that guy' here... but you'll probably HAVE to put a front brake on it to legally race it at Spray Utter... it's a NORBA thing I think... 'three working gears and two working brakes' or something...

Of course, if you put a hydro up front and neglect to put any fluid it it, that would accomplish the same thing as having no front brake. And no one would be any the wiser...
The year before last, I raced mountain cross on a single-speed and no one said a thing. Last year I wore a non-SNELL approved helmet and they let me slide. I figure if they are going to be stupid about it, I was planning on taping a cable to go from the bars to the fork leg to make it look like something is there, or V-brakes with no pads.
I think NORBA doens't really care about the rules. I races the last half of last season as a semi-pro with an expert license. I wonder if I could race pro with the same liscense when I feel ready to bump up.
And to those who asked for pictures of my 3-speed rear, I will post them tomorrow as well as updated pictures of my pornographic ride featuring peeled off stickers and masked off brand names.
 

punkassean

Turbo Monkey
Feb 3, 2002
4,561
0
SC, CA
my buddy tried to race a SS kona Kaboom at otter two tears ago and got shut down by Norba, I wouldn't risk it but...To be honest I think you are fast enough front brake or not.;)
 

binary visions

The voice of reason
Jun 13, 2002
22,161
1,261
NC
That looks... really, really fast, just sitting there.

Did you put a slightly shorter i2i shock on that? It looks low, even for a Tazer.
 

BMXman

I wish I was Canadian
Sep 8, 2001
13,827
0
Victoria, BC
Originally posted by Metal
I am kinda confused as to why online mountain bikers refer to their bikes and parts as porn. Do you masturbate to the pictures or something.
It's just mountain bikers trying to be "cool"...I never understood it myself....D
 

Metal

President of FRONJ
Oct 17, 2001
542
7
Orange County, CA
Originally posted by binary visions
That looks... really, really fast, just sitting there.

Did you put a slightly shorter i2i shock on that? It looks low, even for a Tazer.
The Romic on the bike is a 6.5" i-2-i which is the same i-2-i as the shocks that comes stock on the Tazer. I have it set in the lower BB position. When it comes to short travel bikes like this one, you can almost never be too low. I just measured it to be 12".
 

Full Trucker

Frikkin newb!!!
Feb 26, 2003
11,097
8,696
Exit, CO
Originally posted by Metal
I think NORBA doens't really care about the rules. I races the last half of last season as a semi-pro with an expert license. I wonder if I could race pro with the same liscense when I feel ready to bump up.
Damn that NOOOOORBA! lol

And yeah... bump up to Pro when you're fast enough, eh? That was what, last week? Hope to see you out in CO for Snowmass and all of that...
 

Metal

President of FRONJ
Oct 17, 2001
542
7
Orange County, CA
Originally posted by Full Trucker
Damn that NOOOOORBA! lol

And yeah... bump up to Pro when you're fast enough, eh? That was what, last week? Hope to see you out in CO for Snowmass and all of that...
My friends mom once told me that I need "special lighting" for pictures. That is a good example as to why.
 

Toshi

butthole powerwashing evangelist
Oct 23, 2001
39,638
8,683
Originally posted by Echo
And just like that, it became uncool to call your new bike pics "porn" :D
naw, this "porn" bit has been questioned in the past, albeit perhaps not be one as powerful in the rm mojo as sanjay :D
 

Rik

Turbo Monkey
Nov 6, 2001
1,085
1
Sydney, Australia
Originally posted by Metal
I am kinda confused as to why online mountain bikers refer to their bikes and parts as porn. Do you masturbate to the pictures or something.
got sand in your vaginal porn?

It's a very valid point though, something that I wholeheartedly agree with. Same with things being "pimp" as well. Soon we'll have guys saying "yeh, what a mad crackwhore of a bike, goes hard for a cheap ride", "this bike descends quicker than a paedophile going to hell" and all sorts of other crap :confused:
 

DßR

They saw my bloomers
Feb 17, 2004
980
0
the DC
i don't see anything wrong with calling it porn - back in college my roommate used to make fun of me for "looking at bike porn" when I was surfing MTBR - that's significant b/c he doesn't even know how to ride a bike, and b/c I think that was long before even bikers were calling it 'porn'......

anyway as a side note, the whole "pr0n" thing reeeeeaaallllyy grates on me. It was clever like a year ago when spammers first discovered it.....
 

Orvan

....................
Mar 5, 2002
1,492
2
Califor-N.I.A.
Originally posted by Echo
And just like that, it became uncool to call your new bike pics "porn" :D
Let me retort... other bikes will still be smut. :p But at this point of my riding life, all and any bikes are good!
Internet bike porn is booming!

Whorish Fronjay Flapping a Flatti-Fat-Flat uhm like on easter sunday...
 

Metal

President of FRONJ
Oct 17, 2001
542
7
Orange County, CA
Here is a picture of my 3-speed rear hub. I used a Specialized p-1 rear wheel and a took the 19-17-15t cogs off a Shimano Ultegra road cassette that I had on my old DH bike. My old wheel was very beat up from doing a run down Grafton on a flat and doing the Coke bottle drop on a flat. I was too lazy to rebuild it, so I added 2 gears to the Specialized hub. I think I am going to just keep it like this for good.
 

tmx

aka chromegoddess
Mar 16, 2003
1,683
2
Portland
Originally posted by Metal
My friends mom once told me that I need "special lighting" for pictures. That is a good example as to why.
sanj, that lighting was my bad. sporner has scolded me time and again for being flash-a-phobic. here...this make up for it?