Beer seems to be winning. In order to save this liver I had to destroy it. Righto then, tally-ho chaps.
VB's war on beer
- Thread starter valve bouncer
- Start date
I heard that if you get someone to punch you in the liver and lacerate it about once a month, it comes back stronger each time. Imagine the possibilities.
VB = Valve Bouncer or Victoria Bitter?
Scotch is beating me....but I no fightin' too harrrd..
Trust me, beer always wins in the end. It's just a slow starter.
Victim of Beer?
*point's and laughs*I'm off alcohol for two weeks now and limiting myself to 2-3 drinks a month for the next six months.
:mumble:
(only cause I was told that you have to be cruel to be kind)
Yep, ****ty time of year not to have alcohol too.
Do you reckon it would work with ya knob? Imagine the possibilities of that.
I dont know if its long enough to reach your liver.
This is the only war I have ever wanted to volunteer for. How do I sign up to join the beer army?
Where do I sign up? VB, you are not in this alone, we will support you! 
All right you wankers, you're in, as long as I'm the general. Retreat retreat.....to the pub.
pvssyI'm off alcohol for two weeks now and limiting myself to 2-3 drinks a month for the next six months.
Where's partsy when you need him?
I'd take one for you Generalisimo!!
My local pub is in the brewery.... Looks like I'm gonna have quite the battle on my hands!
Once more unto the breech dear friends......bbbbbbuuuuuurrrrrrrppppp
I have been battling beer myself lately. I've slain many enemy soldiers, their dead lay all about my house. Things seem peaceful now but I will go on patrol later in the day, I hope to be able to ambush a group of the enemy. I know a place where they seem to assemble in numbers of 6.
6 is it? Don't worry, them cunts only attack in a lite formation. We'll let 8th private (twice removed often punched) N8 handle them. You're ordered to attack the Belgians. No quarter is asked......
Those f'ers are massing in my frig right now. I'm going to have to attack them early so they don't get to strong.
I fear VB has been overrun...
The beers are wi
I just punched whiskey in the muthafukkin cunt.
Beer's got me on the run lads! Lasagna reenforcements are on the way. Then we're making another charge on the beer. It's these damn American revolutionaries, Sam Adams and friends. (They had a special on the "winter selection" at the Circle K)
Death to sobriety!
irate2: We will prevail no matter how many beers I must kill!
Death to sobriety!
irate2: We will prevail no matter how many beers I must kill!
Taking on Holland right now, so far I am defeating the wooden shoe guys, 3 of their lads have given all for King and country.
Next up is Canada, and then Mexico...
Next up is Canada, and then Mexico...
Sound, sound the clarion
Fill the fife
Throughout the sensual world proclaim
One crowded hour of glorious beer
Is worth an age without a name
Fill the fife
Throughout the sensual world proclaim
One crowded hour of glorious beer
Is worth an age without a name
Trust me, I don't waste my time on low value targets.
It ended up being a regiment from Saranac Lake NY. A hard fighting mixed breed group of Proper Ales, Porters and Bocks. They seemed to be assembled for a seasonal meeting. It was a slaughter, war is hell.
A Magic Hat 12 pack was my foe. I fought them to a standstill but they're mystery beer did much damage. Now its off to the football game to take on some of the lightweights.
Sobriety has increased their foothold on me. I haven't killed a beer in weeks. They cut off my supply wagon and I am buckeled down for the winter. I plan to make an offensive today under the cover of rain, they will never see what is coming.
I think I was beaten by a boxed wine brigade last night...
Badly.
Badly.
I have been under siege for a while. I keep beating back the bastards and they keep sending reinforcements. The boys from Utica are a tough lot.
They just built a Dogfish Head Alehouse on the road back from the local XC spot. The 120 Minute IPA will defeat you. 20% ABV.