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DieselX

DieselX

Monkey
May 26, 2004
294
0
New York City
I can't do it that fast. My girlfriend laughs at me when I tell her I want a quickie. My fastest time must have been 10 mins.

Mastubration is different, the fastest was like 4 mins, and the longest an hour.
 
llkoolkeg

llkoolkeg

Ranger LL
Sep 5, 2001
4,335
15
in da shed, mon, in da shed
Good grief. This thread has now degraded to men soliciting attention based upon their self-professed sexual endurance. Are these little tidbits supposed to subconsciously register with the few females on this board so that whenever they see such&such's avatar, the think to themselves, "Oh, sweet mercy me! That post is by ____ and I hear he can keep it up for ____ hours! Gosh, do I ACHE to be with that stud, even if but for a one-night 2-hour quickie!"

While you're at it, studs, be sure to post up your complete penile dimensions, both length and girth, your veininess quotient, the number of women you've bedded, the average number of orgasms you give a woman per pudthrusting session, how many 3-ways you've been a requested part of and what your going rates are for seminal donation. Be sure to also post your phone numbers so that the lucky ladies have a way of getting in touch with you and consider an unlimited incoming calls service plan. With the torrent of phone calls and messages you will surely be subjected to, you might consider hiring a hot little number to answer the phone and schedule your many dates. Hell, she'll be so thrilled to be working for YOU that most likely she won't even take a salary for her efforts and will beg to be paid by the fluid ounce. You won't even have to cut the lawn anymore due to the many lusty ladies beating a path to your door and keeping it trodden down! :rolleyes:
 
dh girlie

dh girlie

MISS MISSY (geek)
Feb 11, 2002
8,056
0
A state where you never find the dance floor empty
llkoolkeg said:
Good grief. This thread has now degraded to men soliciting attention based upon their self-professed sexual endurance. Are these little tidbits supposed to subconsciously register with the few females on this board so that whenever they see such&such's avatar, the think to themselves, "Oh, sweet mercy me! That post is by ____ and I hear he can keep it up for ____ hours! Gosh, do I ACHE to be with that stud, even if but for a one-night 2-hour quickie!"

While you're at it, studs, be sure to post up your complete penile dimensions, both length and girth, your veininess quotient, the number of women you've bedded, the average number of orgasms you give a woman per pudthrusting session, how many 3-ways you've been a requested part of and what your going rates are for seminal donation. Be sure to also post your phone numbers so that the lucky ladies have a way of getting in touch with you and consider an unlimited incoming calls service plan. With the torrent of phone calls and messages you will surely be subjected to, you might consider hiring a hot little number to answer the phone and schedule your many dates. Hell, she'll be so thrilled to be working for YOU that most likely she won't even take a salary for her efforts and will beg to be paid by the fluid ounce. You won't even have to cut the lawn anymore due to the many lusty ladies beating a path to your door and keeping it trodden down! :rolleyes:
Click to expand...

Need I say it? Yes...AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! :thumb:
 
Toshi

Toshi

butthole powerwashing evangelist
Oct 23, 2001
39,750
8,749
dh girlie said:
in reference to a new post.
Click to expand...
this is why the proper poster will trim long quotes to the relevant core.
 
binary visions

binary visions

The voice of reason
Jun 13, 2002
22,165
1,261
NC
llkoolkeg said:
Anyhow, it is not cool to abridge my work and rob others of the opportunity to read it again! :D
Click to expand...
Jeez, LL, we're gonna need a shoehorn to wedge your swollen head out the door... Does it affect your balance when riding?
 
Toshi

Toshi

butthole powerwashing evangelist
Oct 23, 2001
39,750
8,749
binary visions said:
Jeez, LL, we're gonna need a shoehorn to wedge your swollen head out the door... Does it affect your balance when riding?
Click to expand...
double entendre much? :oink:
 
llkoolkeg

llkoolkeg

Ranger LL
Sep 5, 2001
4,335
15
in da shed, mon, in da shed
binary visions said:
Jeez, LL, we're gonna need a shoehorn to wedge your swollen head out the door... Does it affect your balance when riding?
Click to expand...
I was just joking in this particular case, but yes, I do have a rather inflated opinion of myself in general. If you ever saw me ride, you wouldn't have to ask that question. I'm usually the one who finishes second to last and first in tumbles taken. :help:


dh girlie said:
Exactly...hey wait a minute...is that an insult? I'll never publicly laugh at one of your posts again...
Click to expand...
Hahaha. Would you consider yourself 'proper'? Perhaps you are the prim debutante in person and only your online personae tends toward the bawdy. :thumb:
 
dh girlie

dh girlie

MISS MISSY (geek)
Feb 11, 2002
8,056
0
A state where you never find the dance floor empty
llkoolkeg said:
I was just joking in this particular case, but yes, I do have a rather inflated opinion of myself in general. If you ever saw me ride, you wouldn't have to ask that question. I'm usually the one who finishes second to last and first in tumbles taken. :help:




Hahaha. Would you consider yourself 'proper'? Perhaps you are the prim debutante in person and only your online personae tends toward the bawdy. :thumb:
Click to expand...

Not all the time...but in certain social situations, at work, etc. yes. Not necessarily a prim debutante by any means, but yes...I can behave like an adult with manners...but when in Rome...:D
 
Echo

Echo

crooked smile
Jul 10, 2002
11,819
15
Slacking at work
Jesus H. I've been ignoring this stupid ass thread, but I should have known there would be a few dillholes here who couldn't act like adults. Why would you possibly feel the need to brag about your sexual prowess on a MTB board? Read llkoolkeg's post :rolleyes:
 
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