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Who likes Chili?

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dan-o

dan-o

Turbo Monkey
Jun 30, 2004
6,499
2,805
SAN FRANCISCO, California (Reuters) -- A diner at a Wendy's fast food restaurant in San Jose, California, found a human finger in a bowl of chili prepared by the chain, local officials said Wednesday.

"This individual apparently did take a spoonful, did have a finger in their mouth and then, you know, spit it out and recognized it," said Ben Gale, director of the department of environmental health for Santa Clara County. "Then they had some kind of emotional reaction and vomited."

Local officials launched an investigation after the incident Tuesday night and the medical examiner determined Wednesday that the object was a human finger.

Officials are trying to determine whether the finger came in the raw materials Wendy's used to prepare the chili, Gale said.

Wendy's International Inc. corporate office did not immediately return a call for comment. Wendy's is the third-largest hamburger chain.


Corporate negligence like this makes me want to beat up 5yr old hippies.
 
LordOpie

LordOpie

MOTHER HEN
Oct 17, 2002
21,022
3
Denver
These are notes from an inexperienced chili taster named FRANK,
who was visiting Texas from New Jersey .

"Recently I was honored to be selected as an Outstanding Famous Celebrity in Texas , to be a judge at a chili cook-off because no one else wanted to do it. *Also the original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's
table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the other two judges that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy, and besides they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted this as being one of those burdens you endure when you're an internet writer and therefore known and adored by all."
Here are the scorecards from the event:

Chili # 1: Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili

JUDGE ONE: A little too heavy on tomato. Amusing kick.
JUDGE TWO: Nice, smooth tomato flavor Very mild.
FRANK: Holy smokes, what is this stuff? You could remove dried
paint from your driveway with it. Took me two beers to put the flames
out. Hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

Chili # 2: Arthur's Afterburner Chili

JUDGE ONE: Smoky (barbecue?) with a hint of pork. Slight Jalapeno tang.
JUDGE TWO: Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
FRANK: Keep this out of reach of children! I'm not sure what I am supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. Shoved my way to the front of the beer line. The barmaid looks like a professional wrestler after a bad night. She was so irritated over my gagging sounds
that the snake tattoo under her eye started to twitch. She has arms like Popeye and a face like Winston Churchill. I will NOT pick a fight with her.

Chili # 3: *Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili

JUDGE ONE: Excellent firehouse chili! Great kick. Needs more beans.
JUDGE TWO: A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of red peppers.
FRANK: This has got to be a joke. Call the EPA, I've located a Freekin' uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been sneezing Drano. *Everyone knows the routine by now and got out of my way so I could make it to the beer wagon. *Barmaid pounded me on the back; now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. She said her friends
call her "Sally." Probably behind her back they call her "Forklift."

Chili# 4: *Bubba's Black Magic

JUDGE ONE: Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
JUDGE TWO: Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish
or other mild foods, not much of a chili.
FRANK: I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to
taste it. Sally was standing behind me with fresh refills so I wouldn't have to dash over to see her. When she winked at me her snake sort of coiled and uncoiled ... it's kinda cute. I'm getting toasted!

Chili # 5: *Linda's Legal Lip Remover

JUDGE ONE: Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground adding
considerable kick. Very impressive.
JUDGE TWO: Chili using shredded beef; could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
FRANK: My ears are ringing and I can no longer focus my eyes. I belched and four people in front of me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed hurt when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue by pouring beer directly on it from a pitcher. Sort of irritates me that one of the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks!

Chili # 6: *Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety

JUDGE ONE: Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spice and peppers.
JUDGE TWO: The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. *Superb.
FRANK: My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous flames. *No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that babe Sally. I asked if she wants to go dancing later. I need to wipe my ass with a snowcone!

Chili # 7: *Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili

JUDGE ONE: A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
JUDGE TWO: Ho Hum, tastes as if the chef threw in canned chili peppers at the last moment. I should note that I am worried about



Judge Number 3, he appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
FRANK: You could put a hand grenade in my mouth and pull the pin and
I wouldn't feel a damn thing. I've lost the sight in one eye and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My clothes are covered with chili which slid unnoticed out of my mouth at some point. Good, at autopsy they'll know what killed me. *My pants are full of
lava-like **** to match my damn shirt. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful and I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air I'll just let it in through the hole in my stomach. Call the X-Files people and tell them I've found a super nova on my tongue.

Chili # 8: *Helen's Mount Saint Chili

JUDGE ONE: This final entry is a good, balanced chili, neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge Number 3 fell and pulled the chili pot on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor Yank.
JUDGE TWO: A perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili, safe for all, not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.
FRANK: * -----------------------------

(editor's note: Judge #3 was unable to report)
*
 
dan-o

dan-o

Turbo Monkey
Jun 30, 2004
6,499
2,805
SkaredShtles said:
I don't like that kind of chili, but I do like *this* kind of chili:


:drool:
Click to expand...
I could eat green chile all day long, fingers or not.
 
El Jefe

El Jefe

Dr. Phil Jefe
Nov 26, 2001
793
0
OC in SoCal
dan-o said:
Corporate negligence like this makes me want to beat up 5yr old hippies.
Click to expand...
"You know, this chili tastes different...it tastes like...hmmm, I recognize the taste but I just can't put my finger on it...."



I'm sure Wendy's purchases the chili as premade, so the negligence shouldn't be on their shoulders, but on the company that made the chili.
 
dh girlie

dh girlie

MISS MISSY (geek)
Feb 11, 2002
8,056
0
A state where you never find the dance floor empty
El Jefe said:
"You know, this chili tastes different...it tastes like...hmmm, I recognize the taste but I just can't put my finger on it...."



I'm sure Wendy's purchases the chili as premade, so the negligence shouldn't be on their shoulders, but on the company that made the chili.
Click to expand...
All they need to do is narrow it down to the guy who's missing a finger...
 
J

JRB

Guest
dh girlie said:
Shut up, ass...I meant SCARRED. I'm in a nyquil induced haze...cut me some slack.
Click to expand...
Haha - the other day, someone meant scared. :think:
 
H8R

H8R

Cranky Pants
Nov 10, 2004
13,959
35
At least it wasn't a testicle.

Finger chili is bad, but testicle chili is really, really bad.



What about vulva chili? Now that would be yummy.
 
H8R

H8R

Cranky Pants
Nov 10, 2004
13,959
35
dh girlie said:
Sorry...I prefer a hearty guffaw as opposed to total dork ass internet acronym like ROLF or LAFOLF or LOL... ;)
Click to expand...
Or ROFLMAOCMPBFMEALAGF





(rolling on floor laughing my ass off crapping my pants bleeding from my eyes and leaking a greenish fluid)
 
Westy

Westy

the teste
Nov 22, 2002
55,993
22,030
Sleazattle
The question that begs to be asked is whether the finger was cut off in an accident or if it simply fell off of a leperous chef.
 
pnj

pnj

Turbo Monkey till the fat lady sings
Aug 14, 2002
4,696
40
seattle
am I the only one that wonders where the rest of the body is?

people chilli!

sounds like a movie......
 
pnj

pnj

Turbo Monkey till the fat lady sings
Aug 14, 2002
4,696
40
seattle
LordOpie said:
...or a South Park episode.

Do NOT piss off Cartman!
Click to expand...
Ahahahahahaha! hell yea. I forgot about that one.

I was thinking texas chainsaw...... :oink:
 
I Are Baboon

I Are Baboon

Vagina man
Aug 6, 2001
32,742
10,682
MTB New England
ALEXIS_DH said:
i think i´ve read this yesterday on snopes. it happened on march 22 2005.

they have a picture and everything. its supposed to be a female finger, because it had a long manicured nail.

dont click if you dont want to see the pic
http://www.snopes.com/horrors/food/chili.asp
Click to expand...
I wonder how many times the person chewed the finger before realizing it wasn't something that belonged in the chili.
 
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