stoney98 said:[sketchy marina guy] So uh.. you want to graba drink at happy hour?[/smg]
HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Worst Date stories
- Thread starter Damn True
- Start date
HAHAHAHAHAHA!
I'm kinda curious how this can happen?dh girlie said:
I mean, really, most guys I know will settle for a Safeway bag filled with mud. My worst date:
I met this chick in the bar one night and we pretty much hit it off. Super chatty, friendly, touchy feely, she seemed pretty interested in getting to know me. She even bought ME a drink. We hit up the restaurant for this date. Nothing too fancy as we both kind of felt like keeping it casual and relaxed and all. When I picked her up I knew that it was going to be a looong date just from her lack of any kind of reaction when meeting me at the door. I'm not a super talkative guy (hence the nickname SilentJ - my friends actually call me that), but I'm usually pretty good one on one. I really dont think she put together a string of more than five words the whole night...everything was: "yes" / "no". It was pretty painful. I ended up excusing myself once she was done her meal, paid the bill, went back and said "ready?" she nodded and I took her back to her place....I still dont know what the deal was. Never saw her again. No loss.
Lol... probably this girl from woodside who I hooked up with at the sketchiest party ever... don't remember her at all.Kopiklokoli said:
stinkyboy said:
could have been I guess...she had two beers with dinner and showed no sign of lightening up, though. Its not like it was awful, just a waste of time.
Freshman year at Iowa I had to start the year living in a dorm lounge with 6 other guys because the dorms over booked. Anyway, I meet a girl on the floor and we hang all week. The first Friday we go out to the bars and drink our share and head back to the dorm. Things are getting a little hot so we go back to the lounge and get down to business. Lounge mates come home and leave us alone. About 5 AM she starts pulling my are and trying to wake me up.
"yoneedtotakemehospiitaall"
Me "what"
"youneedtotakehospppiiaalll"
I wake up, open my eyes and there is this 200 lbs beast next to me. I start freeking out. look on the floor at her clothes and hand them to her to put on but they don't fit. Turns out she was alergic to latex and didn't know it. She blew up like a ballon. My lounge mates made fun of me for weeks and never believed me that it was really the girl from down the hall.
"yoneedtotakemehospiitaall"
Me "what"
"youneedtotakehospppiiaalll"
I wake up, open my eyes and there is this 200 lbs beast next to me. I start freeking out. look on the floor at her clothes and hand them to her to put on but they don't fit. Turns out she was alergic to latex and didn't know it. She blew up like a ballon. My lounge mates made fun of me for weeks and never believed me that it was really the girl from down the hall.
Well if at the end of the date you just want to run for cover then you're forced to make the choice of gettin' some or putting yourself out of your misery.SilentJ said:I'm kinda curious how this can happen?
And there is also still that double standard in place....a guy scores on the first date he's a stud, if a girl scores on the first date she's a slut (Even though as I've gotten older those concerns have flown out the window...if a guy can't handle the fact that I like sex...well, his loss I guess) .
Jekyll800 said:
Don't know if you got to his dates with Ms. America yet but she is sueing him over that stuff.
stoney98 said:
And before it comes up:
Either she had never had protected sex before or was a virgin. Either way I didn't ask and we never hooked up again she was too embarassed.
I figured that was the case, but I'm a freak show when it comes to technicalities...'you didn't get laid because it was a terrible date' not 'it was a terrible date because you didnt get laid'.Velocity Girl said:
I typically wont try too hard to mount the woman right away if I like her a lot...if it happens, it happens. If I know that it really wont work out then Ill do my best to get my dipstick oiled ASAP. I have the rockinest GF ever right now (i.e. shes the one) so I don't have anything to worry about :love:
SilentJ said:
Good point....but if the date/guy was so terrible that you choose to fly solo that night....well it must've been a pretty bad date!!!
Two come to mind... Kinda the same... First off was this chick that looked like a small version of Amy Mann. Wanted to get her out forever... We get through the first 3/4 of the date...things going good...she's been initiating some good physical contact and she lays the "you know I'm seeing someone" card on the table like it aint gonna phase..... What a waste....Turns out he was hangin at the counter the day I asked her out... 4-5 years before that, been cultivating this curvy little beast for 2 dates...3rd date going real good. Bar close, great summer night...parked under a tree in front of her house, got her on the hood, and its past the point that ya want someone drivin up on, so I suggest we move into the house...Without skip'n a beat she says..."we cant, my husbands home."
Clark Kent said:
WOW!!! Time to role her off the hood and get the hell out of dodge.
Tucker max is nothing short of a baller. A true American hero.
Yeah, that story's nasty. Who is this guy?stinkyboy said:
I dunno...but I have been reading his stories all day on that site, and although disgusting and gross, they are absolutely hysterical...I'm going to pick up where I left off tomorrow...bluebug32 said:
Wow...my story can't top most of these, but this one was...interesting. During my senior year of high school, there was this exchange student from Belgium I liked. It was a dreary Pacific Northwest day, so we decided to go see a movie. The only place that was still showing the movie she wanted to see was an old 2nd run moviehouse. It had been years since I'd been there, but I remember it being an old-school 1930's cool kind of place. Well...in the intervening years the place had become a real dump with a lot of unusual customers, but we were there so we went anyway.
About a third of the way through the movie, I felt the seat backs of our chairs moving. I looked over my shoulder and saw a fat woman lumbering out through the row of seats behind us. Eventually, I heard this subtle, labored breathing sound behind us. I look up and back, and there is the most hideous, bohemouth beast of a woman I've ever seen hovreing over my date. Suddenly, the look on this woman's face got just a little weirder, and I knew something was about to happen. I reached over and grabed my date, yanking her out of her chair, pulling her over ontop of me before she even knew what was happening (must've really suprised her at first!). Suddenly, the creature-like she-beast standing behind her let an enormous flow of vomit loose, right where my date's head was mere fractions of a second before. This jaba-the-hut look alike would've puked all over my date's head, but instead just puked all over her now vacant chair, with only a small splatter landing on her shirt.
She was very appreciative of my quick action (even I was suprised how quickly I moved her- this whole sequence of events between me looking over my shoulder and the puke flowing was 2 seconds, max), but needless to say that date was a real bust. That is OK though. Although we hit it off, nothing really "clicked" anyway, so we just became friends, and hung out semi-regularly until she went back home. I even went to visit her for a couple of days a few years later when I visited Belgium with my new girlfriend (who is now my wife).
About a third of the way through the movie, I felt the seat backs of our chairs moving. I looked over my shoulder and saw a fat woman lumbering out through the row of seats behind us. Eventually, I heard this subtle, labored breathing sound behind us. I look up and back, and there is the most hideous, bohemouth beast of a woman I've ever seen hovreing over my date. Suddenly, the look on this woman's face got just a little weirder, and I knew something was about to happen. I reached over and grabed my date, yanking her out of her chair, pulling her over ontop of me before she even knew what was happening (must've really suprised her at first!). Suddenly, the creature-like she-beast standing behind her let an enormous flow of vomit loose, right where my date's head was mere fractions of a second before. This jaba-the-hut look alike would've puked all over my date's head, but instead just puked all over her now vacant chair, with only a small splatter landing on her shirt.
She was very appreciative of my quick action (even I was suprised how quickly I moved her- this whole sequence of events between me looking over my shoulder and the puke flowing was 2 seconds, max), but needless to say that date was a real bust. That is OK though. Although we hit it off, nothing really "clicked" anyway, so we just became friends, and hung out semi-regularly until she went back home. I even went to visit her for a couple of days a few years later when I visited Belgium with my new girlfriend (who is now my wife).
At least it wasn't his date puking all over him...and all over his car...and on the side of your neighbor's car...Zark said:Bwahaha, ohh man, that is classic Towelie! You are the puke dodger!
Ahhh OK already! I'll tell the storyJoe Pozer said:
Classic white trash date:
My date has a partially drunk bottle of raspberry vodka and suggests finishing it...soon
I drive her up the mountain where we can drink and....
She drinks, gets a little friskey, and then looks totally sour.
I take the hint and drive her ass home before the technicolor rainbow goes off in my Tacoma.
I didn't get her home quite quick enough.
Results: Truck that smells faintly of rasberries and higher standards in my dates (kinda)
Zark said:
So what.........you now require that they at least live in a double-wide vs single?
Ahhhhh... so that's what that smell was.Zark said:
Hahahaha... that's a classic story. I didn't know they allowed white trash in S.B. Though I guess you are still south of the Fresno-Dixon line.
Thankfully I have never had any really bad dates. (Of course I never had many dates to begin with.) Though once I did stand there and watch in amazement as my date picked up on another girl in front of me. I just kinda backed away slowly and went home. Yes, I left her there. :nuts:
C'mon, we know you are trolling down in Oxnard.Zark said:No one rocks single wides in Santa Barbara dude, even the trailer trash here are upper echelon.
You're not asking them out via e-mail are you? If so they may not understand what you are saying.mack said:
And I was CEO of that club.
Don't worry though, because when the aging Lotharios are still plying their schtick, you'll be home with your wife of many years. (Or husband. I'm not one to discriminate
)
That kid's site is like crack cocaine. I can't stop reading his stuff.Jekyll800 said:
D
d-sop
Guest
:love: potato gunsMMike said:
i had to see cat in the hat, the one that was "rated pg" which shoulda been r