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Zorbees vs. Shamwow

BurlyShirley

Rex Grossman Will Rise Again
Jul 4, 2002
19,185
17
TN
Shamwow commercial says "Beware of imitators," but Billy Mays is a man of integrity... how is a man in need of the towel of the future supposed to make this decision?
 

r464

Turbo Monkey
Oct 17, 2006
2,608
2
Earth
There is only one possible outcome.

The ShamWow guy and Billy Mays must have a shovel fight to the death.
 

Broken_Spoke

Mr. Big Hot Pastrami
Feb 26, 2003
2,410
0
Bozeman, MT
"This one last for a week. This lasts for 10 years. I don't know, sells itself."-Vince the Shamwow guy


Imagine if Billy Mays was a librarian.
 

jebfour

Turbo Monkey
Jun 19, 2003
1,195
52
CLT, NC
Billy Mays never stops yelling to make his point, but the shamwow guy wears a headset while on TV......

I don't see a clear winner.
 

$tinkle

Expert on blowing
Feb 12, 2003
14,591
5
Shamwow commercial says "Beware of imitators," but Billy Mays is a man of integrity... how is a man in need of the towel of the future supposed to make this decision?
billy mays has thinned his influence now that he's taken up pimping insurance. however, the shamwow kid has all the allure of an mtv real world contestant (even looks like puck from the 1st season).

just hump a sheep?
 

H8R

Cranky Pants
Nov 10, 2004
13,967
35
The Shamwow guy says at one point, "...but if you call now, within the next 20 minutes, cause we can't do this all day..."

Slimy guy from NJ with impatient sales pitch FTW.
 

BurlyShirley

Rex Grossman Will Rise Again
Jul 4, 2002
19,185
17
TN
Usually Billy Mays will throw in some kind of completely unrelated trinket to sweeten the pot with an order. Like if you order some mighty putty, you get a free screw driver or something... but he doesn't toss anything in with the Zorbees. I guess they sell themselves as well.
Hmmm....
 

llkoolkeg

Ranger LL
Sep 5, 2001
4,329
4
in da shed, mon, in da shed
I think you should lock Billy Mays, Tony Little and the Shamwow twit in a hot conex for one week and see who comes out of it. My prediction? The Shamwow twit would get pounded into jerky within half a day and Tony Little would become Mays' sue-EEET ponytailyank bitch for the remainder of their incarceration. Mays is related to the devil, by marriage methinks.
 

BurlyShirley

Rex Grossman Will Rise Again
Jul 4, 2002
19,185
17
TN
A credible source has informed me that Fitness Celebrity John Basedow uses Shamwow.

Implications?
 

stevew

unique white person
Sep 21, 2001
34,239
4,514
How long until Billy Mays is selling sex toys on midnight info-mercials?
 

jebfour

Turbo Monkey
Jun 19, 2003
1,195
52
CLT, NC
How long until Billy Mays is selling sex toys on midnight info-mercials?
**In Billy Mays yelling intimidator “buy now” voice**


……..AS SHOWN BY OUR SIDE BY SIDE COMPARISON!

ORDER WITHIN THE NEXT 3 MINUTES AND YOU NOT ONLY GET THE ORGASMITRON 2000, YOU’LL ALSO GET THE ORGASMATRON 1500 (THE TRAVELERS EDITION) AND THREE FREE ZORBEES TO CLEAN THINGS UP.

ORDER TODAY, OPERATORS ARE STANDING BY!!!!!
 

IH8Rice

I'm Mr. Negative! I Fail!
Aug 2, 2008
24,548
492
Im over here now
How long until Billy Mays is selling sex toys on midnight info-mercials?
O&A have a good bit mocking the guy who sells baseball cards on the home shopping network.

"Sammy Sosa rookie cards!! and we'll also throw in some VIRGINS if you call in the next 10 minutes!"
 

CdaleTony

Chimp
May 26, 2006
47
0
Billy Mays is too close to AL Borland (Tool Time).
Shawwow guy, Too close to that guy who parks near the school and playground...:disgust1:
 

Frazer_james

Chimp
Oct 4, 2008
3
0
I've actually met Billy Mays AND Vince and I'm happy to say they are both really nice guys. Can't say the same about Lesko.

I went to a effin strip club with Vince in San Diego. You have no idea how crazy that was. That dude gets the chicks.

The best part about Billy Mays, I got to direct him in a video we did for an advertising awards show. Check it suckas.

 
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JohnE

filthy rascist
May 13, 2005
12,667
708
Front Range, dude...
I've actually met Billy Mays AND Vince and I'm happy to say they are both really nice guys. Can't say the same about Lesko.

I went a effin strip club with Vince in San Diego. You have no idea how crazy that was. That dude gets the chicks.

The best part about Billy Mays, I got to direct him in a video we did for an advertising awards show. Check it suckas.

Lesko is a dick? Do tell...
 

Mr Ridiculous

Margarita my slippers
Apr 21, 2006
435
0
Morgantown, WV
Gotta be careful about any claims I make but I'll leave it like this... Don't lend the dude any money. AND he wears that suit everywhere! He must have hundreds of them.
I can vouch for the suit thing. My dad told me a few months ago he was coming home, driving on the interstate when he passed one of those boxy Scions covered in question marks. He looked over and there was Lesko, in full question mark suit, driving the thing.
 

BurlyShirley

Rex Grossman Will Rise Again
Jul 4, 2002
19,185
17
TN
Gotta be careful about any claims I make but I'll leave it like this... Don't lend the dude any money. AND he wears that suit everywhere! He must have hundreds of them.
Is this the greatest post in the history of ridemonkey? I think it just may be!

From apparently firsthand experience, "Don't lend Matthew Lesko any money" :rofl:
 

Sandwich

Pig my fish!
Staff member
May 23, 2002
16,932
1,515
01776
I've actually met Billy Mays AND Vince and I'm happy to say they are both really nice guys. Can't say the same about Lesko.

I went to a effin strip club with Vince in San Diego. You have no idea how crazy that was. That dude gets the chicks.

The best part about Billy Mays, I got to direct him in a video we did for an advertising awards show. Check it suckas.

is this the best first post ever? some dude out of nowhere who hangs out with professional sales-pitch allstars?
 

cannondalejunky

ease dropper
Jun 19, 2005
2,928
1
Arkansas
my favorite line from the shamwow guy is " your going to spend $20 a month on paper towels alone" ...does he use paper towels to dry himself off after a shower, or when he gets out of the pool. i buy the 6 pack of the cheapest ones they have and that lasts me a long time
 

Frazer_james

Chimp
Oct 4, 2008
3
0
is this the best first post ever? some dude out of nowhere who hangs out with professional sales-pitch allstars?
I'll accept the nomination if you're throwing it out there like that. :biggrin: Also, to clarify, hanging out with them is more of a work thing than anything else.

Here's one cool thing of note. Billy and Anthony Sullivan are actually being followed by the producers of that "Ice Truckers"(?) show on Discovery for their own show called Pitchmen. They were filming last time I saw them and I got to see a trailer. It's gonna be hilarious.