[LordOpie]

I farted. Loudly. In the bathroom at work.

Let me explain:
I'd been married for about 9 years. In the beggining of those nine years, I trained my ass to withhold gas in front of my wife. It got to the point, where my farts were no longer man farts....they turned into this pathetic low sounded phfft....I starting farting like a girl.
Even when I was not around my wife, my farts were truely pathetic sounding (smelled the same, but I missed the loud thunderous sound from my ass).

Well, this morning, I get to work, and I go to urinate. As I'm standing at the stall, I expelled gas.

A audible... lonnnnng...fart. A man's fart. It felt good. It was about 10 seconds in length. I was giddy, so I chuckled. Never had I farted that I felt the need to chuckle alone....but I did.

Anyway, I'm back I my desk. I feel the need to fart again, but I'll spare my co-worker.... I guess all those years training my ass was not wasted.

 

[Full Trucker]

http://www.storytimewithmyass.com/

 

[LordOpie]

it's still funny mutha trucka!

 

[caboverpete]

Who in the world holds their farts around a woman they married?

 

[dh girlie]

I farted. Loudly. In the bathroom at work.

Let me explain:
I'd been married for about 9 years. In the beggining of those nine years, I trained my ass to withhold gas in front of my wife. It got to the point, where my farts were no longer man farts....they turned into this pathetic low sounded phfft....I starting farting like a girl.
Even when I was not around my wife, my farts were truely pathetic sounding (smelled the same, but I missed the loud thunderous sound from my ass).

Well, this morning, I get to work, and I go to urinate. As I'm standing at the stall, I expelled gas.

A audible... lonnnnng...fart. A man's fart. It felt good. It was about 10 seconds in length. I was giddy, so I chuckled. Never had I farted that I felt the need to chuckle alone....but I did.

Anyway, I'm back I my desk. I feel the need to fart again, but I'll spare my co-worker.... I guess all those years training my ass was not wasted.

Hysterical!

 

[llkoolkeg]

Who in the world holds their farts around a woman they married?

In fact, why deprive her of the opportunity to flee for safety by taking the battery out your body's smoke detector? The fire marshal may say monthly testing is the answer, but I feel that it would be irresponsible as a husband and a father to test my alarm with anything less than daily frequency.

 

[JRB]

We're proud of you Opie. Nothing better than a good pooty out in public.

 

[Tenchiro]

The greatest gift a man can give the woman he loves is a stank ass fart.

 

[schwinnstr8]

2 words - DUTCH OVEN!!!!

 

[Lexx D]

Let me explain:
I'd been married for about 9 years. In the beggining of those nine years, I trained my ass to withhold gas in front of my wife. It got to the point, where my farts were no longer man farts....they turned into this pathetic low sounded phfft....I starting farting like a girl.

Wow you really are a wuss. You held farts back for 9 years! Your not man your a scared little girl that's worried it might effect her popularity. Hhahaha you just made may day........9 years.

"but, but if she knows I fart she may not like me anymore" :nuts:

 

[RideND]

First a triple ring and now holding in farts! What a disgrace to man.

 

[Full Trucker]

it's still funny mutha trucka!

Dude! Your story is HILARIOUS! I was merely suggesting that you join up at that site and share with the rest of the world!

 

[LordOpie]

 

[Knuckleslammer]

Know what I like to do. Yeah I'm sick but it's funny. Go into the stall with a black majic marker. Pull down about 2 feet of toilet paper. Write
"WIPE IT GOOD AS**OLE" roll it back up

 

[Smelly]

Know what I like to do. Yeah I'm sick but it's funny. Go into the stall with a black majic marker. Pull down about 2 feet of toilet paper. Write
"WIPE IT GOOD AS**OLE" roll it back up

that's awesome. i'm about to head to class. i just put a sharpie in my bag so i can do this.

 

[Flakey Jake]

You shouldnt marry a woman if u cant fart around her!!!

 

[Tenchiro]

http://www.maximonline.com/world_o_sex/articles/article_5891.html

How long should a guy wait to fart in front of you?

• Until he’s my boyfriend: 39%
• Forever, if at all possible: 34%
• At least until dinner’s over: 13%
• Until we live together: 12%

“It’s never OK to do.”—Lulu, 30, therapist, NY

 

[jmvar]

next step, lighting them on fire. when I was 12 my best friend could do this. I am 26 now and I still look up to him.

There is nothing more satisfying than ripping one that is so long, it changes to a higher pitch sound right at the end.