[Changleen]

Any of you lot heard of Transactional Analysis? What about Ego States?

OK, Here is a brief explanation:

When engaging in a conversation (called a 'transaction', as in a communication transaction in this field) people broadly place themselves in one of three ego states.

The ego states are Parent, Adult and Child. When we have a conversation with anyone, about anything, we play the role of one of these three states, and so does the person we are conversing with.

(Very) Brief descriptions:

Child: Childish; Refusal to take points seriously; use of humour as defence/way to ignore points being made; deflection etc.

Parent: Talking down; stating points as 'facts'; 'This is the truth'; Imaging parents telling a 3 year old about boiling water and not grabbing pans off the stove; often seen as 'patronising' tone.

Adult: Use of rational part of brain to listen, contemplate, understand and reply rationally and without resorting to the other two states.

A genuine conversation can really only occur if both parties in the conversation are in the same ego state, and for most purposes, a productive and rational argument can only occur when both parties are in the Adult state.

More here: http://www.businessballs.com/transact.htm

So I was thinking, maybe we could all try and stick to our Adult state a little more in here, at least for the first few posts in a thread?

 

[genpowell71]

I would agree with you on this, but seeing as how I'm stone drunk right now, forget it!!!! :nuts:

 

[Changleen]

Ah, the 4th ego state!

 

[enkidu]

RM, Moderator: I vote to make this a sticky!

It's a good mental-exercise to go through before posting in PD or before engaging in any conversation really.

 

[clancy98]

Oh let me guess, Chang, which Ego state YOU fancy yourself to be in?....

 

[Changleen]

^^^ Child.

Me = Parent right now, telling you that you're in Child

 

[H8R]

LA LA LA LA NYA NYA NYAHHH!!!

(fingers in my ears)

I CAN'T HEAR YOU!! WHAT?? WHAT?? LA LA LA LA AAAAAHHH NYA NYA NYA!!!

 

[clancy98]

hahaha

 

[genpowell71]

Too Funny!!!

 

[clancy98]

eh, not much response.... try again, chang.

N8 would have twice the number of responses by now....

 

[genpowell71]

I think the rest of RM is tired of his loud mouth, left wing, communist propaganda Bullshiat.

 

[Changleen]

Good try Gen. I'm still not gonna argue about nothing.

 

[H8R]

I think the rest of RM is tired of his loud mouth, left wing, communist propaganda Bullshiat.

Commie propaganda? Right on McCarthy.



Loud mouths on both sides, saying what amounts to nothing.

 

[genpowell71]

AHHH!!!! Another loud mouth Schmuck.

And I hate Bigger and better than you jagoff.

Hey Chang, I almost forgot, check your IM box.

 

[Changleen]

Just did - Tis empty. Did you spell my name right?

 

[webb]

Child: Childish; Refusal to take points seriously; use of humour as defence/way to ignore points being made; deflection etc.?

but humor doesn't necessarily mean that you're not taking a point seriously, only that you have seen an opportunity to make a joke.

Parent: Talking down; stating points as 'facts'; 'This is the truth'; Imaging parents telling a 3 year old about boiling water and not grabbing pans off the stove; often seen as 'patronising' tone.

but there are imperial truths that exist- if you ride on flats too long you'll f-up your rims and your tires. breathing helps you live. eating food is a good idea. what's wrong with stating them?

So I was thinking, maybe we could all try and stick to our Adult state a little more in here, at least for the first few posts in a thread?

no humor? why would I read any of these threads then?

to be honest, these kinds of pseudo-psychological descriptions of human interaction are fairly annoying. generally, they're shared by people who think they are intellectually superior to everyone else and use them to try to mold other people's behavior. but they don't see the glaring contradiction that they've actually posted- in this case, announcing that there are only three kinds of discourse and that there's a hierarchy to them is actually fairly "parental", wouldn't you agree? by making an imperial statement like that, you're basically making your parental response before anyone has stated anything, and anyone that disagrees with an over-arching truth like that is, by definition, making an imperial statement themselves and falls into the catagory of #2. this ultiimately makes the first statement infalliable and above the discourse that this claims to promote.

to sum up: dear changleen, f-you.

 

[H8R]

And I hate Bigger and better than you jagoff.

That's very nice. Hugs and good vibes bro.

:love: :love: :dancing:

 

[Changleen]

but humor doesn't necessarily mean that you're not taking a point seriously, only that you have seen an opportunity to make a joke.


but there are imperial truths that exist- if you ride on flats too long you'll f-up your rims and your tires. breathing helps you live. eating food is a good idea. what's wrong with stating them?


no humor? why would I read any of these threads then?

to be honest, these kinds of pseudo-psychological descriptions of human interaction are fairly annoying. generally, they're shared by people who think they are intellectually superior to everyone else and use them to try to mold other people's behavior. but they don't see the glaring contradiction that they've actually posted- in this case, announcing that there are only three kinds of discourse and that there's a hierarchy to them is actually fairly "parental", wouldn't you agree? by making an imperial statement like that, you're basically making your parental response before anyone has stated anything, and anyone that disagrees with an over-arching truth like that is, by definition, making an imperial statement themselves and falls into the catagory of #2. this ultiimately makes the first statement infalliable and above the discourse that this claims to promote.

to sum up: dear changleen, f-you.

You've misunderstood. There are far more than 3 types of discourse. I suggest you go and read around the subject a bit before making such sweeping statements.

We both just used Parent, BTW.

Edit: Also, this isn't 'my' idea - it's a widely used tool for despute resolution and management... If you don't like it you need to be saying 'F you' to a fairly wide group of psychiatrists and behaviour-studying-people. (Adult, bordering on Parent.)

 

[genpowell71]

I cant believe this thread made it to 2 pages.