[eaterofdog]

My coworkers are driving me crazy. They are all fifty-somethings who get all giddy when they find a piece of technology simple enough for them to operate. Bluetooth headsets are all the rage here. Imagine if you will, a race of wrinkled, incompetent cyborgs.

The current trend is to select a ringtone that will give others the impression that you are retarded, turn the phone all the way up, leave it on your desk and then leave the office for two hours. Preferably during a family crisis, so it rings nonstop. My super has asked me to stop taking the batteries out of peoples phones (they can't get them back together) so it's time to get creative.

Help me find something to create a ringtone that will bug the hell out of everyone. I have some Yoko Ono going on, but I need to level up.

 

[jonKranked]

if i were you, i'd be updating my resume

 

[jonKranked]

-rick astley "never gonna give you up"
-vuvuzela bzzzzzzzzzz
-the barney theme song
-the sound of flatulence

 

[nelsonjm]

Crazyfrog is probably high up there.

...or banana phone

 

[sstalder5]

 

[stevew]

this is mine...

it used to be freamon from the wire saying "english motherfvcker".

Chinese Seaman: [Speaking foreign language]
Moreland: Hey, hey.
Chinese Seaman: ...English.
Middle Eastern Seaman: No English.
Eastern European Seaman: ...English.
Arab Seaman: English...
Moreland: Kunta kinte, yabbdabba dabba do.
African Seaman: Huh...?
Freamon: Hah mishy gishy gushy gushy mishy meshy mushy, mother****er.
African Seaman: Eh?
Freamon: Eh! Negro, you can not travel half way around the world and not speak any mother****in' English.
African Seaman: [Speaking foreign language]
Freamon: English, mother****er!

 

[jonKranked]

a recording of william shatner trying to be a serious actor

 

[w00dy]

Are you going to set your own phone to this, or change the offender's?

It it's the latter I vote something along the lines of "hey everyone, I'm looking at gay porn!"

 

[Kevin]

Ask MMike to voice rec one of his threads?

 

[eaterofdog]

Are you going to set your own phone to this, or change the offender's?

It's going on my phone, so nothing blatantly offensive. I need to have plausible deniability so it has to be something that someone would use as a ringtone.

You ****ers can't even beat Yoko Ono?

 

[Total Heckler]

Get it here...

http://www.geico.com/about/commercials/music/ringtones/

 

[bizutch]

We had a customer with one that screamed..."HEY! DOWN HERE! I'M IN YOUR POCKET! LET ME OUT!!! LET ME OUT!"

Either that or Sam Kinnison.

 

[stevew]

You ****ers can't even beat Yoko Ono?

there is always kanye.....

 

[ridiculous]

owl city - fireflies

 

[jonKranked]

a justin beiber interview

 

[I Are Baboon]

a ringtone of MMike starting a thread.

 

[Sandwich]

well I had one that had the "pork chop sandwiches" dialogue on it:

Another guy I knew found one that said "YOU HAVE A PHONE CALL" and some other crap. Both of those were pretty annoying.

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

I have Samuel Jackson from Pulp Fiction saying, " who the fvck is this asshole ? "

 

[jonKranked]

well I had one that had the "pork chop sandwiches" dialogue on it:

back when aol instant messenger was still the only game in town, i took a .wav file of him saying "pork chop sandwiches!" and made it into my buddy icon. it played everytime i would message someone and the window opened up

 

[RUFUS]

Damn you, I was just about to post this. Serves me right for getting work done first. Damn you, damn you!!!

 

[SuzyCreamcheese]

As a "50 something" I do have to agree with you about the f*cktards who can't even come close to figuring out technology. However, the people in my lab with THE MOST F*CKING ANNOYING ringtones are late 20-30 year olds. I know this because they are the ones with offspring who live with them and have emergencies and the fone rings and rings and rings. They almost always have the ringtone that came with the fone. The rising doodly doodly doooooo and the duh duh duh duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh.

Mine? I have a copy of the Addams Family scream. I am ALWAYS reminded that I left my fone on

The Cheese

 

[eaterofdog]

 

[Bicyclist]

Quoted for truth, that was fvcking terrible.

 

[jonKranked]

 

[eaterofdog]

Yeah I think I have already arrived at the nuclear solution. It went off and one of the techs stands there for a second, and he goes "Jesus Christ, is that Yoko Ono?"

 

[jonKranked]

 

[Sandwich]

this post is now about trololo

 

[jonKranked]

 

[buildyourown]

The "most annoying sound in the world" is good because old people don't get it.
It's an inside joke at work, poking fun at the 60+ guys who are hard of hearing and have a habit of making really loud noises by using tools improperly.


I must admit, Yoko is hard to beat.

 

[mattmatt86]

I have Samuel Jackson from Pulp Fiction saying, " who the fvck is this asshole ? "

I had that one to. It was always good for some laughs when it would ring in public places.

 

[DirtyMike]

Group X.. and there rendition of super mario bros...... I have it, its ****en horribly annoying


Here is a taste

 

[IH8Rice]

"im a gummy bear"

 

[DirtyMike]

"im a gummy bear"

Ihave that one too...... The scream is hideous... but I lvoe it

 

[Uncle Cliffy]

The obvious choice:

 

[Snowflake]

Yoko is pretty amazing. I have to say, I enjoyed it as art.

B.Spears "If U Seek Amy" would be amusing around stuffy old people without being directly inappropriate.

 

[disasterarea]

 

[worship_mud]

ok, that's already pretty annoying, but i raise to this: