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Need help...Fell on to the wagon again

dogwonder

dogwonder

Nitro
May 3, 2005
1,849
0
Walking the Earth
I've had only one beer in about the last two weeks. I don't know how this happened, but I have fallen on to the wagon again. Has anyone else dealt with this affliction? Is there a support group or professional I can see to try to get back off the wagon again?

:help:
 
D

dw

Wiffle Ball ninja
Sep 10, 2001
2,943
0
MV
Its a serious situation but I can help.

Drop whatever you are doing right now. Go to the local package store and buy a 12 pack of black label or something. Open the cardboard carefully. You do not want to damage the precious goods. Inside you will find some aluminum cylinders. Grasp one firmly in your hand. You will see a tab on one end of the can. That side should be facing up. Pull on the tab. You will notice that an opening appears on the top of the can. Put the opening to your mouth and turn the can upside down. Drink. Then repeat 11 times.

After that you should be all good.
 
SkaredShtles

SkaredShtles

Michael Bolton
Sep 21, 2003
65,799
12,799
In a van.... down by the river
dw said:
Its a serious situation but I can help.

Drop whatever you are doing right now. Go to the local package store and buy a 12 pack of black label
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Dog - do *NOT* listen to this person. They do *NOT* know what they are talking about.

Go to your local liquor store and purchase a 6-er of your favorite ale. Preferably a tasty IPA. Stick it in your basement. Go for a ride. Preferably a nice 4-6 hour ride.

Come home, bring out the six (which should have warmed to a nice cellar temperature by now), open one, pour it into your Ridemonkey pint glass. Enjoy the rich color. Smell it and enjoy the aromas of a well crafted beer. Taste a bit. Savor the ale flavor. Slowly finish the first and if it hasn't put you into a nice place, maybe have one more.

Repeat tomorrow.

And the next day.

And the next.

:D
 
dogwonder

dogwonder

Nitro
May 3, 2005
1,849
0
Walking the Earth
SkaredShtles said:
Dog - do *NOT* listen to this person. They do *NOT* know what they are talking about.

Go to your local liquor store and purchase a 6-er of your favorite ale. Preferably a tasty IPA. Stick it in your basement. Go for a ride. Preferably a nice 4-6 hour ride.

Come home, bring out the six (which should have warmed to a nice cellar temperature by now), open one, pour it into your Ridemonkey pint glass. Enjoy the rich color. Smell it and enjoy the aromas of a well crafted beer. Taste a bit. Savor the ale flavor. Slowly finish the first and if it hasn't put you into a nice place, maybe have one more.

Repeat tomorrow.

And the next day.

And the next.

:D
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It's....raining....very....hard....

No...









Ridemonkey.....







Pint......







Glasses.........




I have the shakes right now.
 
D

dw

Wiffle Ball ninja
Sep 10, 2001
2,943
0
MV
SkaredShtles said:
Dog - do *NOT* listen to this person. They do *NOT* know what they are talking about.

Go to your local liquor store and purchase a 6-er of your favorite ale. Preferably a tasty IPA. Stick it in your basement. Go for a ride. Preferably a nice 4-6 hour ride.

Come home, bring out the six (which should have warmed to a nice cellar temperature by now), open one, pour it into your Ridemonkey pint glass. Enjoy the rich color. Smell it and enjoy the aromas of a well crafted beer. Taste a bit. Savor the ale flavor. Slowly finish the first and if it hasn't put you into a nice place, maybe have one more.

Repeat tomorrow.

And the next day.

And the next.

:D
Click to expand...
LOL

OK, I like both methods. Mine was just a little more "extreme" if you will. :banana::banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana: :banana:
 
BadDNA

BadDNA

hophead
Mar 31, 2006
4,257
231
Living the dream.
SkaredShtles said:
Dog - do *NOT* listen to this person. They do *NOT* know what they are talking about.

Go to your local liquor store and purchase a 6-er of your favorite ale. Preferably a tasty IPA. Stick it in your basement. Go for a ride. Preferably a nice 4-6 hour ride.

Come home, bring out the six (which should have warmed to a nice cellar temperature by now), open one, pour it into your Ridemonkey pint glass. Enjoy the rich color. Smell it and enjoy the aromas of a well crafted beer. Taste a bit. Savor the ale flavor. Slowly finish the first and if it hasn't put you into a nice place, maybe have one more.

Repeat tomorrow.

And the next day.

And the next.

:D
Click to expand...
SS is the man with the plan. I think I need to leave work early and go practice my technique. Gotta prepare myself for my first excursion into the world of homebrewing tomorrow don'tcha know.:cheers:
 
OGRipper

OGRipper

back alley ripper
Feb 3, 2004
10,655
1,129
NORCAL is the hizzle
SS's plan is for ordinary times - for after you've re-attained your proper beer-life balance.

This is no ordinary time.

D-Dub is more on track, except for that part about being careful...
 
A

AA717driver

Chimp
Oct 21, 2006
30
0
The land of Bio-diesel
dw was right! This is not a time for half-measures. This man needs beer stat! And lots of it.

Normally, I'm for quality over quantity (given a fixed beer budget) but these are not normal times.

But, if PBR, Black Label or Blatz makes you gag, try a 12'er of Natural Light or, if money is really tight, Milwaukee's Best Light.

After that treatment is done, we can start rebuilding your intolerance for crappy beer... ;) TC
 
D

dw

Wiffle Ball ninja
Sep 10, 2001
2,943
0
MV
ahahaha

this thread kills me. :) Having completed a hard Saturday of work, and due to the fact that I have not been on the wagon, I am going to have a Hoegaarden.

And then probably some coors lights or bud heavies.
 
Brian HCM#1

Brian HCM#1

MMMMMMMMM BEER!!!!!!!!!!
Sep 7, 2001
32,119
378
Bay Area, California
Look we have a serious situation with dogwonder not drinking beer. WE ALL NEED TO PULL TOGETHER AND HELP HIM THROUGH THIS!!!!!!!





Time for some more Black & Tan's, later peeps:D
 
Nobody

Nobody

Danforth Kitchen Whore
Sep 5, 2001
1,484
6
Toronto
Much as I love dw, and greatly respect both his product designs and his business savvy, I do recall coming by the Evil Bikes tent one year at Big Bear [might have been Mammoth, tho] and was subjected to, i think, Bud Light as the sole offering.

Admittedly, much muttering from the crew [Mike, was it?] but c'mon.

Bud Light?

Bud Anything?

Anything Light?

All I'm saying is, in this single arena, some of his choices may be suspect.

eeesh.
 
LordOpie

LordOpie

MOTHER HEN
Oct 17, 2002
21,022
3
Denver
I've gone two weeks or more without beer several times. The solution during this drought is wine and/or liquor.

But my woman just brought home two cases of Major Tom's Pomegranate Wheat and Shiner 97 Black Lager.

Balance has been restore.
 
Nobody

Nobody

Danforth Kitchen Whore
Sep 5, 2001
1,484
6
Toronto
stevew said:
Who the fvck comes up with this?

How can that possibly taste good?

honestly
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Likely it's just the whisper of a hint of a suggestion of pomegranates...

Either that or it's fruity yuppie swill...

Had a bit of both, here and there...
 
dogwonder

dogwonder

Nitro
May 3, 2005
1,849
0
Walking the Earth
Thought I had the fix going to a christening followed by apps and food. This on a Sunday right during football. Surely I could find my fix.

Alas, the options were Coors Light and Smirnoff's Ice. I couldn't bring myself to do it. I did have a glass of wine, but it just wasn't the same.

The drought continues...
 
D

dw

Wiffle Ball ninja
Sep 10, 2001
2,943
0
MV
AHAHAHAHAA

I make no excuses for my beer tastes. I just haven't found many that I really dislike.
 
TreeSaw

TreeSaw

Mama Monkey
Oct 30, 2003
17,670
1,855
Dancin' over rocks n' roots!
Yes, you do need help! You simply must follow this prescription:1. go to the local beer store and stock up on a variety of brews;
2. Get home as fast as possible;
3. Open one beer and drink;
4. Repeat step 3 until there are no more beers then go back to step 1 and repeat weekly!
:cheers:

Either that or you'll have to come up for a ride again and beers afterwards...that might cure you as well.
 
skatetokil

skatetokil

Turbo Monkey
Jan 2, 2005
2,383
-1
DC/Bluemont VA
IPA = India Pale Ale, a light colored, bitter, aromatic beer produced with lots of hops and very little malt because the malt would rot on the ship to India.

Some excellent examples include the Dogfish Head 120 Minute IPA, the Harpoon IPA, and the Mad River Steelhead IPA. One of those should be available at your local grog shop.

Red Hook IPA is a good generic alternative.
 
dogwonder

dogwonder

Nitro
May 3, 2005
1,849
0
Walking the Earth
SkaredShtles said:
psst - he's joking. He knows damn well what an IPA is. Hell, he's probably brewed one at some point. I'm starting to think he's just an attention whore.

:D
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SS post count = 17,652
Dogwonder post count = 1,089

who's the attention whore?

skatetokil - yes, I am joking and do I love a good IPA. Simcoe and Cascades seem to be my favorite hops at the time, but I had a bitter in Whistler made with Fuggels and absolutely loved the smell. Best apres beer I've ever had!

edit: Picking on someone with a serious problem is not funny. I need to get to rehab fast and a trip to Half-Time http://www.halftimebeverage.com/ is in order.
 
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