[AngryMetalsmith]

The building and neighborhood that my studio is in has had some problems with thieves. They are mostly of the opportunistic nature and steal things like purses and phones.

I was thinking that it might be fun to set up a christmas tree in the hallway with some presents underneath it. The presents, which surely will not last long, could be filled with some unexpected surprises, such as electronics boxes filled with road kill.

What thief would not be overjoyed to unwrap a gift, see an Ipod box thinking they could pawn it for a chunk of cash, only to discover it contained a dead squirrel.

What else could be put in a box and wrapped up for our xmas thieves ?

 

[jonKranked]

sh*t.

 

[DirtMcGirk]

Can you get your hands on some bio-hazard waste?

Used surgical stuff, needles, maybe some used tampons just to drive the point home.

 

[RUFUS]

a pipe bomb filled with nails. That will teach them a lesson.
But seriously, try to set up some type of stick bomb that goes off when opened. Something that really stinks.

 

[mandown]

Can you get your hands on some bio-hazard waste?

Used surgical stuff, needles, maybe some used tampons just to drive the point home.

i can. being in a hook squad has privledges
...i just don't want to handle it. buyer must arrange for pickup.

 

[DirtMcGirk]

Nothing but McCain campaign propaganda.

Later we can blame all crime on him, and again sit back and chuckle with the thought of what could have been should he and Nalin Palin have ever taken office...

 

[sanjuro]

A GPS tracker.

 

[maddog17]

how bout a cigar box filled with talcum powder and when you open the box up, the powder explodes into your face. put a note in telling them to enjoy the anthrax

 

[Arkayne]

It sounds like you have the rm secret santa thing down!

 

[DirtMcGirk]

Can you get your hands on some powdered gonorrhea?

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

A GPS tracker.

Awesome.

The downtown bike cops would love that.

" Here ya go officer, the coordinates to an easy day, muray krismuss. "

It sounds like you have the rm secret santa thing down!

It's probably a good idea that I stay out of the secret santa thing.

 

[johnbryanpeters]

how bout a cigar box filled with talcum powder and when you open the box up, the powder explodes into your face. put a note in telling them to enjoy the anthrax

Good way to get the feds on your ass big time.

 

[jonKranked]

If you wanna go for the gross out:

used tampons/condoms/douche.

Or something completely worthless, like:

sand, gravel, sticks, dried leaves, junk mail, obituary clippings, things like that.

 

[stinkyboy]

Encouraging criminals to come to your door and then fuggin with them is not a good plan.

On another note: I rolled up to my bank the other day and see a wallet lying there by the door...

Well played King, well played.

 

[jerseydirt]

fill it with blue ink. Or you could smurf them-when you spray them in the face with blue stuff at high velocity.

 

[Damo]

What kind of apartment block has a Christmas tree in the hallway with real presents underneath?
Unless these thieves are really stupid, they won't think they are real for a second!
Then, by the time Christmas is over, your hall is going to stink of ripe roadkill.

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

What kind of apartment block has a Christmas tree in the hallway with real presents underneath?
Unless these thieves are really stupid, they won't think they are real for a second!
Then, by the time Christmas is over, your hall is going to stink of ripe roadkill.

It's not an apartment, my studio is a metalsmithing studio in a building with other artists in a neighborhood with more artists in a city with...

 

[sanjuro]

Even better:

A Fake Gift Certificate for $500 worth of work, so when the thief returns to claim his free gift, you can give him his just rewards.

 

[Drunken_Ninja]

a box inside a box inside a box inside a box inside a box inside a box inside a box with nothing in it.

 

[I Are Baboon]

Give them a box of VX.

 

[zahgurim]

Got any friends working in banks?

Get some of those exploding dye packs they stuff into the moneysack when they're being robbed.

That sh!t won't wash off.

 

[maddog17]

Ok another take on mine.... Same box but have a small dart shoot out.
Leave note saying if dart hit you then you have been poisond. Also have a small vial in the box that's the "antidote". To live drink the antidote which of course will be something nasty like your pee or an animals pee, or whatever.

 

[Streamline]

Fill it with rocks to get about the right weight and the rest of the way with those dots from a paper hole punch.

I am digging the condom idea as well... make sure you put some hair gel with a touch of powdered sugar mixed in on the inside, and put some vasoline on the outside of the box so they think they got the nasty on their hands.

Put a letter inside that says, "You've been caught on candid camera. Please email xxxx@xxxx.com for your prize." then sign them up for spam and pass the address on as well.

 

[Da Peach]

spoiled yogurt. I hate that.

 

[MMike]

box o' scabs....

 

[boogenman]

If you wanna go for the gross out:

used tampons/condoms/douche.

Or something completely worthless, like:

sand, gravel, sticks, dried leaves, junk mail, obituary clippings, things like that.

I like the used condoms, tampons and some sanitary napkins, mmmmm

And mad gay porn clippings.


In high school me and my buddy cut hundreds of gay porn clippings out and stuffed them into the vents of another dudes locker. When he opened it between periods gay porn flew all over the place in tha hall in front of many many other students. It was fvcking funny as hell!

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

box o' scabs....

Are you offering to donate from you collection ?

 

[Westy]

Ground fiberglass.

 

[Bullitrider]

Connect the gift box to the Christmas lights and a hot wire.

 

[sanjuro]

Burn the tree and the building down.

 

[pinkshirtphotos]

raisinettes but change them for shiny goat poop

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

Burn the tree and the building down.

If I did that I wouldn't have a computer or internet access and couldn't respond to any of your posts.




Wait a minute...

 

[maddog17]

Ground fiberglass.

asbestos!!

 

[TN]

Encouraging criminals to come to your door and then fuggin with them is not a good plan.

On another note: I rolled up to my bank the other day and see a wallet lying there by the door...

Well played King, well played.

There could be some value to that card & stuff....

From November 12-14, Burger King will be dropping a total of 5000 wallets "in high-traffic areas and landmarks around Chicago." The wallets will be filled with "a BK Crown Card pre-loaded with $5 to $20 and cold, hard cash ranging from $1 to $100." The money - and presumably, the wallet - is yours to keep if you find one. So if you’ve avoided all of Chicago’s finest tourist traps up to this point, now would be a fine time to strap on a fanny pack and work on making ends meet.

http://www3.timeoutny.com/chicago/blog/out-and-about/?p=10331

 

[TN]

How bout a Chia Pet?

 

[Westy]

How bout a Chia Pet?

Cha-Cha-Cha-Cha-Cha-Chia



How about a Clapper?

 

[Da Peach]

box 'o slugs

 

[skinny mike]

How about The Clap?

fixed

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

Live snakes

 

[MMike]

Live snakes

I was going to say springy paper snakes a la "fake peanut brittle can"......but live snakes would be good too......